Wine & Cheese: 1st Serving 2018

wineandcheese2Some Wednesdays I devote a blog to whining. Despite being a really happy, positive person, I do have things that annoy me at times. I never let anything grate on my nerves for long but thought it would be fun to vent them periodically in my blogs. I also feel that good things, the cheese in life, should be acknowledged as well. I’m even going to throw in a bit of dessert, a piece of virtual chocolate, something that made me laugh or smile just a bit more than normal. If you’d like to read the past editions of Wine & Cheese just search past postings. Sit back and join me now for a serving of some whine and cheese!

 ~*~ ~*~ ~*~

 WINE WHINE

😦 I know, it has been months since I blogged. Life. It happens.

😦 Mom is on the decline, I probably see it more than the rest of the Diva Den because I don’t see her for a few days sometimes when I’m doing double shifts. And others see it when the come over and haven’t seen her in a few weeks. 😦

😦 Winter is here and it has been so dang cold! And snow…OH I really do not like it one bit outside of being pretty to look at as it is coming down and then it just plan sucks.

 

CHEESE

🙂 Mom may be declining but here we are in January, 6 months past when we were told 2-4 weeks left to live. WOW. We had 2 Christmas celebrations, one in July and then she made it to Christmas anyway! She is one tough cookie. She is going to lose this battle, we know that, but we rejoice that she is still here!

🙂 Nearly a year into this job and I love it still just as much as the first day! Okay MORE than I did when I started. These sweet souls with whole hearts and broken brains are so amazing with what they can do, and how they make me smile, challenge my reserves when I cannot find a ‘tool’ in my belt to redirect or comfort them…I’m growing as a person thanks to them.

🙂 I have new air plants! I killed the last 3, I forgot for long stretches to dunk them in water for 20 minutes and those little things dried up. But I have 3 new ones. I have already neglected these too (face palm) but I’m trying!

🙂 Not sure what rock I was living under but I’ve only recently learned of bullet journaling and OMGoodness I LOVE it!!! Maybe my air plants stand a chance of survival after all now that my life is becoming more organized. More on this topic in a later post, which will happen thanks to this new way of being organized.

🙂 I have new jammies. I got a nice, warm, fuzzy set from my sister for Christmas and that prompted me to watch for after Christmas sales. Got a nice, $40 pair for $15 on sale and with some Kohl’s cash. I now have 2 pair and I’m in heaven. Go me!

DESSERT

da9830e6ba9c32d7f820942ea8597352

Advertisements

Wine & Cheese ~ 94th Serving

wineandcheese2Welcome to Wine & Cheese, my weekly, Wednesday whine session.

Most Wednesdays I devote a blog to whining. Despite being a really happy, positive person, I do have things that annoy me at times. I never let anything grate on my nerves for long but thought it would be fun to vent them periodically in my blogs. I also feel that good things, the cheese in life, should be acknowledged as well. I’m even going to throw in a bit of dessert, a piece of virtual chocolate, something that made me laugh or smile just a bit more than normal. If you’d like to read the past editions of Wine & Cheese just click HERE for all of the past postings. Sit back and join me now for the 94th serving of some whine and cheese!

 ~*~ ~*~ ~*~

 WINE WHINE

😦  I hate winter.  I hate cold, snow, wind, all of it.  I hate wearing a coat, heavier clothes and the shorter day light hours.  Pretty much if it is part of winter, other than Christmas, I HATE IT.

😦  I had lofty aspirations of getting the year off to a running start.  It is 1/7 and not so running.  Who am I kidding, not even moving!  But that is being adjusted, read on in the cheese section.

😦  The Florida house hunting/vacation trip has been pushed back to June, but that too has a cheese side to it.

 

CHEESE

🙂  I did something rather radical today.  Okay radical for me anyway.  I joined a gym/fitness center.  I know, sit down and breathe slowly, I’m shocked too.  But I am sick of my weight, and I want to be bikini ready come the Florida trip so the only way to ensure this was likely was to join.  See, it is too dang cold to walk outside and I figure if I am going to pay for it then I will go.  So, I’m meeting the trainer tomorrow to get a program in place for me to bust my ass into shape.

🙂  Yes, Florida got moved to June due to The Badge’s work schedule but that is okay.  I just have one more month now to reach the weight that it says on my driver’s license and get toned up so I can rock that string bikini.  Not to mention the several pairs of jeans in my dresser that I want to be able to wear.

🙂  I even found sweat pants at the thrift store, for only $1 a pair!  I am not there to be seen, so I don’t care if Kim Kardashian wouldn’t be caught dead in them.  I hope NOT to be seen as that is my early morning, no makeup, leave me the hell alone time.  It’s get into shape so that by late Spring I can rock the shorts instead.

🙂  I’m currently rocking the Highlander Grogg Coffee and my jammies at 7pm.  I am also about to go curl up with a good book!

🙂  All this talk of fitness and I’m debating joining the running group at church to train for The Flying Pig.  Even if I do NOT run it, I’ll be that much more fit! Not mention the fun of making new, like minded friends!

 

DESSERT

Untitled

Tuesday Coffee Chat ~ What Makes Me Unique?

Today is Tuesday, and time for the Tuesday Coffee Chat.  Join in and post your answer the the Tuesday question!

What Makes Me Unique?

  • I’m 50 years old and still a big kid!  I love pink dye in my hair and ANYTHING Hello Kitty.
  • Direct Sales? I’m addicted and have 3 different direct sales businesses.
  • My desk has a variety of toys on it, from Hello Kitty, Smurfette, and the entire Wizard Of Oz Happy Meal collection.
  • I love the color pink, bright pink!  My office practically glows when the lights are on thanks to the bright pink walls.
  • I have a watch fetish.  I own about 15 watches, and will likely own a lot more as I find cute ones to add to my collection.
  • I took the Kolbe A Index and MO quiz online, best $$ spent in a while, and discovered I am a 7-3-7-3.  🙂
  • Social Media is like a drug addiction for me!  Thanks to that it is an area that I am given to work on for the company so that I can play to my strengths.
  • I  love chocolate, especially dark!
  • Marti with the party! I just like to be positive and have FUN!

What’s In A Name?

Names seem to carry with them some significance as to the personality traits associated with the name.  The bible talks of names, and even at times of God instructing a father to give a certain name to a particular child.   I know that when I look up meanings of names, my children do seem to have the characteristics associated with their names.

I also find it interesting how we are named by our parents.  My name, Martha, is from my mother’s side.  It is common to name the oldest daughter after the mother, and son after the father, at least in the Roman Catholic faith.  I carry my mom’s first name, as I am the oldest.  She is the oldest of her siblings and named Martha like her mother.  My brother is named after my dad, and so on.  I broke that tradition with my children. Oops.

Nicknames are a funny thing too.  While mom is named Martha, her siblings all call her “Marty”, though outside of family, everyone calls her “Martha”.  When I was born I too was called “Marti”.  I changed the ‘y’ to an ‘i’ going into high school for several reasons, one being that too many assumed “Marty” was short for “Martin”.  I wanted it very evident that it was a female name.  In 50 years no one has ever called me Martha other than in school those first few days until teachers got used to the nickname.  More than once I’ve sat through hearing my name called at the doctor’s office or other places where they have your legal name, because from the day I was born no one uses my given name.  Well, one person did, and that was my grandfather.  I was born on his birthday, was his first grandchild, and he always called me “Martha Marie”.  He loved that name.  Even grandma called me Marti.  No greater man has graced my life than my grandpa, and therefore, honestly, I do not deem anyone worthy to call me Martha Marie.   I love the name Martha, as I first encountered it outside the family when I was very little, in the character of “Marvelous Martha” on Sesame Street.  I always loved that little snippet.  It is where I got the idea for my blog name, as I do find life to be very marvelous.

My mom’s family, after my birth, called her ‘big Marty’, or ‘big Mart’ and me ‘little Marti’ or ‘little Mart’.  That still is the case today, which is funny to hear one of my uncles or aunts say “hey, little Mart, how are ya?”  When I was pregnant with my daughter, my one uncle asked if we were going to name my daughter Martha, so then we could have Big Mart, Little Mart and Mini Mart.  While we found this rather comical, the ex-hubster said NO.  And that is okay too because I love the name he chose for my daughter, Liesl.

So, what is in my name? In Hebrew it seems it meant ‘lady’.  I like that.  But I wanted more, so I went looking.  The Kabalarian Philosophy website has an interesting take on names and their power in our lives, and I have to say that the characteristics associated with both the name Martha, and Marti, are pretty on target with me.   Too much to publish here, but you can check it out and check out your own name there.

The Landscape Of 2013

375254_588441514504373_587190092_nWhen I first told my mom I was getting a divorce, back in February 2010, she looked at me and said, “you think the world is ending now, but trust me, a year from now the landscape of your life is going to be so different than it is at this moment.”  It was hard to believe that anything could be different than what I felt at that time, the pain and depression, and that it would be better than I was able at that time to imagine, but I kept those words in my heart and mind as I drifted mindlessly through the process.

The thing about mom is she is right about 99.9% of the time.  And wouldn’t you know it, one year out, January of 2011, my life was indeed very different.  My first Christmas as a divorcee was past me, and my first New Year’s Eve.  I not only survived it, but wow what an amazing holiday season it had been.  No longer married to Ebenezer Scrooge, I  found so much joy again in the season and relished the memories I made through that year.  I had moved in with my mom, sister and 2 nieces.  We had 2500 square feet of new home to enjoy and I discovered that despite the many differences (and similarities) in our personalities, and the nay-sayers that said it would never work, it rocked.  We laughed a lot around here. Daily in fact and we still do.  I can still count on one hand, though admittedly only about one digit is left to spare, the number of times I’ve gotten into a heated argument or confrontation with any of my housemates.  In that time I discovered it wasn’t me that had the ugly attitude and temper for 22 years.

As 2012 is coming to a close, and January looms over the hill in less than 24 hours, I realized that it will be 3 years now since that day when the ex told me he wanted out of my life.  The day my world changed forever and life became known as “before the announcement/after the announcement”.  And again this year the landscape of my life has changed very much.

So, what things changed, what did I learn in 2012?  That is really what this is post is all about.

CHANGES IN THE LANDSCAPE

*My son married on St. Patty’s Day and I gained a daughter-in-law and granddaughter (my first grandchild).

*My first grandson was born the day after Christmas, to my son and his wife, making me a grandma twice over.

*My younger brother (the older of the two brothers) married the woman I believe is the love of his life, on 12/30/12, in a flash wedding ceremony at the local conservatory.  We all walked in, located the spot that they as a couple determined was a good, quieter one, and the minister began the ceremony.  With visitors to the conservatory who happened to be in the room, or wandered in, all looking on with us close family, they were married.  Then we were off to a wonderful (I cannot say enough about the food OMG) dinner to celebrate.  I loved this as we have waited, not too patiently, for this day to finally arrive.

*I did not end up marrying at the nationals for the “outlaw” motorcycle club that the now ex-boyfriend (but very very dear friend) was a member.  I did not end up marrying at all.  I’m single but honestly more than content being so.  I’ve learned to relish my singleness and not at all sure I will ever marry again.  Not closing the door on that but it is no longer on my bucket list to marry again.

*The ex-hubby tied the knot while on vacation in Jamaica this year, and much to my surprise I not only wasn’t hurt by it, I was thrilled for them both!  And over joyed for my children, even though they are adults, she is a wonderful person to have in their lives and I believe has made their lives that much richer with her love of them.

*I went back to ‘school’ and achieved my certificate to be a nurse aide.  In a few weeks I’ll take my state test and hopefully find a job in this field quickly.  I loved working with the residents in the nursing home during clinicals and think I may have found my niche in life.

THINGS I LEARNED IN 2012

*No one is responsible for my happiness.  I am not lonely because I am not ‘attached’ to someone.  I’m not ‘alone’ either.  I knew all of this but as the year progressed it came to be better understood on deeper levels to me.  I am independent, confident, and comfortable as Marti.  I am not “just Marti” because I am not “Marti and ______ “, but rather I am MARTI – marvelous, fun, quirky Marti.  I am happy, have fun, enjoy life and love me as I am.

*I do have areas of me and my life that  need to improve, and I’m actively working on those.

*My faith is very important to me, and I need to take nurturing that faith more seriously.

*95+mph on the back of a Harley on the highway is liberating, crazy, amazing….and I’m okay if I never do that again.  Oh don’t get me wrong, I was terrified of highways at all up until the Biker/Cowboy, but in a pack of riders who are riding like they just stole the motorcycles (some probably had if I was honest with myself), it was an outstanding rush!  But not wise and certainly not something I want to keep doing.  I had my moments on that one, crossed it off the bucket list.

*People I had admired, looked up to, and had inspired me, people I thought were over all good people…can turn out to to be evil, vindictive people.  And many who play the victim are not only the ones doing the victimizing, they usually are just seeking attention.

*It is perfectly okay to write whatever I want in order to vent and get it out of my system, but it isn’t always necessary to hit “publish” once I am finished writing.  Somethings are better left between me and the keyboard, or to be published at a later date in my novels or on my pen-name/ghost blog.  No I do not share that one, sorry.  It is the place for things I don’t publish under my real identity to avoid hurting people I love.

*My son continues to amaze me, but that is another post.  But one thing I learned, just when you think you cannot possibly love your children anymore than you already do…they have children of their own and your heart swells bigger as you watch them hold their own child and you find you love them more and in a brand new way.

The landscape of 2013 is before me, and over the next 12  months it will change, grow, parts will die off and when I look up at the end of this year, it will look familiar, no doubt, but it will be again so different from what it is now.

Living And Loving Plan B

Recently, while browsing the hospital gift shop, my sister found this birthday card that had a piece in it called, “Life Is All About How You Handle Plan B”, by Suzy Toronto.  We both loved it.  Next to the cards we discovered calenders for 2013 with a different piece for each month, like “Never Under Estimate The Power Of A Hissy Fit”.  We both bought one of the calenders, we plan to frame each piece because they are fantastic.  We also plan to read the book, The Sacred Sisterhood Of Wonderful Wacky Women”.

The piece is too good not to share:

Life is All About How you Handle Plan B
Plan A is always my first choice.
You know, the one where
Everything works out to be
Happily ever-after.
But more often than not,
I find myself dealing with
The upside-down, inside-out version —
Where nothing goes as it should.
It’s at this point that the real
Test of my character comes in..
Do I sink, or do I swim?
Do I wallow in self pity and play the victim,
Or simply shift gears
And make the best of the situation?
The choice is all mine…
Life is all about how you handle Plan B.

It got me thinking about my life and how pretty much it is a series of plan B.  And we never planned for Plan B, it comes with it’s own charted and uncharted waters.

Plan A was just get through high school and stay under the radar. Plan B, I ended up pregnant and gave the  baby up for adoption.

Plan A, I got married with Cinderella dreams and it ended in divorce a few years later and Plan B was I found myself a single mom.

Plan A, I got married again, this time with somewhat more realistic dreams to the man I called my Hero, but later found out I spent 22 years married to a man who had never wanted to marry me in the first place (his words not mine) and the  last few years living what I felt were our best years, while listening to him daily lie to me about his love for me.  Plan B became single again in my late 40’s and a sincere lack of trust for much of anything that any man will now tell me as far as how he feels about me.  To say my views of the male side of the species is jaded would be spot on.

I could delve into a lot of other examples but those are the primary ones that come to mind.  It sucks when Plan B pops up, at least initially. However, if life is all about how you handle Plan B…well honestly over all I think I’ve done well.  Oh I didn’t always just accept it with arms open wide, and sometimes fought against it a bit, but eventually I came to realize that Plan B can have a lot more to offer.

When the current Plan B first began, I spent some time wallowing in self pity and honestly I don’t feel I played the victim, I WAS the victim.  And I jumped into far too many relationships really fast looking for a balm for my wounded heart.   But I started to embrace being single and now I see the benefits.  Trouble was then along came the Biker and now I am stuck at a fork in the road with entirely too many paths to choose from.  And I’m not sure that I’m ready to ever again be Mrs. __________ (fill in last name of whichever man is vying for my hand).

I’m currently living the Plan B dream of sorts.  No, not making the kind of money I WILL be making (trust me I will). But I’m working for myself.  I get up when I feel like it, go to bed when I want too.  I have FREEDOM.  I dyed my spiky locks auburn for a while, now they are bleach, skanky blond.  I am saving for some new tattoos (having ink envy big time looking at my daughter’s gorgeous, latest tattoo that wraps around her body).  If I want to walk around in the morning with bed-head, scratching my butt, farting and then pee in the shower, I have no one to worry about offending with the unladylike behavior.   I’m finding it difficult to nurture a relationship along when I am the only person I really feel the desire to nurture.  I’ve been told I’m selfish and self centered for  my “life is all about ME” attitude right now, and for not being able to give my whole heart to another, because I am still mourning the loss of the man who truly was my Hero.  Well then I suppose I can carry that label too.  Because right now, that is Plan B – ME!

I’m re-examining my faith and getting back into my Bible study and finding a church home.  Not one I can go to with someone else as a couple.  Some where to go ALONE.  I don’t want to be “Marti & _____” when I go there.

I am building my business and have taken on another that has even greater earning potential to have me sitting very comfy in a short time financially.  Those take up a lot of time right now and I LOVE what I am doing.

I want to be free to enjoy the friendship I have with several male buddies.  Not booty buddies, they are FRIENDS.  One is a former lover (Mr. Wonderful) but our friendship stayed very much intact and his wisdom offers a sweet balance to my ADD and OCD ways at times.  I want that freedom to go enjoy a drink and help him mend his relationships, share about my faith walk etc. with him.  But that causes waves in my relationship with the Biker.

Marriage is off the table with the Biker and every other man, and not sure it will ever be served as an option again.  Marriage  honestly isn’t a side dish I want with my meal of life with any man at this point.  I’m not at a place where I want to deal with “why haven’t I heard from you yet today” when I wake up and don’t text a good morning until it is now “good afternoon”.  I don’t want to cause waves in the relationship ocean because I went and saw a movie, or checked out a band, or had a drink with an old male friend who I may or may not have slept with at some dot on my timeline of life.  I’m just not happy being tied down, my spirit wants to soar the skies right now.

I’m not seeking other options or wanting to keep my options open.  The only option I want is to explore Plan B MY way, in MY time, on MY terms.  I get that it is not what the man in my life wants right now, but we are not at the same place with wanting a relationship.  And if that is selfish, so be it. Then I guess I am self centered.  When one is independently owned and operated, it IS all about ME!

Sharing Some Blogger Love

WOW, I received another blog award today.  I’m delighted of course! So here is the scoop:

I was nominated/given the award by Carla, over at Seasons Change, And Change…, and first, thanks a bunch! I love when someone enjoys my page!

If you find you’ve been given the love from me, this is what you do:

You will need to Thank the person that nominated you first (me) and link the blog to that person before you start.

Then you  will have to tell the world 7 things  we might find interesting about you. Then you add your 7 nominees.

SO, first and foremost, I can hopefully think of 7 things about myself that I’ve not really shared on my blog, that others may or may not find interesting.

  1. When I was in high school I very much wanted to be a lawyer.  Then I learned how much schooling was involved, and that sometimes you have to defend someone that is completely guilty.  I couldn’t do that.  I probably could have been a good prosecuting attorney but still, any chance of having to work as a defense lawyer and I’d not be very good.
  2. After that, my dream was to be a stay at home mom.  Yeah, never got that one either but that’s okay.  After 28 years of working as an admin assistant and office manager, I am doing daycare in my home, which is pretty close to being a stay home mom except I get to sleep at night. Well when the menopause allows me too.
  3. I’ve had things like cold pizza and fried chicken for breakfast.  But probably the one odd ball thing that stands out is popcorn.  I used to make it sometimes at work for breakfast and that always got me a bunch of strange looks.
  4. I like ketchup on my roast.  This used to just take the ex off his rails.  To me, it’s beef.  But I like steak sauce on my hamburgers.  He felt it ruined the roast and I think he even got a tad insulted.  To me, it enhances it.
  5. I love lima beans!  Not creamed, just good old fresh/frozen lima beans, prefer them steamed.  They are yummy.  Mix them with corn…succotash, yeah baby!
  6. IF I believed in reincarnation, I’d want to come back as a pampered house cat.  Black. That way it would make me very mysterious.  And I’d of course want a pink, blinged out collar.
  7. Sometimes I love to sit outside and blow bubbles.  I love them. I think it’s therapeutic.  Not to mention great fun with kids, but frankly I like it better by myself.

And now, to award this to 7 bloggers I enjoy:

The Beautiful Angeo at Martini’s Needed

Kim from Truly Simply Pink

Nani over at Chronicles of Nani

Susi over at Boca Frau

The Cinful one, Cinful Cinnamon

Ducky from Bat Crap Crazy

The other Marti who muses, Arty Marti

Hopefully they can all participate too!

Mid-Week Odds And Ends

It is hump day.  My brain is all over the place.  Probably because the pressure is mounting.

I have my dress for the wedding, but not my shoes yet.  I have NO idea what shoes to wear!  I will worry about those Friday.  Maybe. I hope.

And then there is the rehearsal dinner, which is tomorrow night.  I still need to find something to wear to that! ARGH!  Headed out after dinner in search of something.  Gotta love my last minute approach.

*Note to Melissa: I WILL have shoes don’t worry, promise not show up at your wedding in my bare feet. No guarantee how long the shoes will remain on at the reception.  Mother-of-the-groom or not, I just HATE shoes!*

Today I went and had my nails put back on.  You’ll recall that in December last year I boxed those up and shelved them along with my highlights.   Soon after that I dyed my hair cherry-cola (far cheaper than the salon highlights!).  With the wedding this weekend, mama needed to have her nails done again, so today I am sporting claws!  I missed them SO much, but now I’m trying to get used to typing with them again. Ugh.  Then I will get used them again and not be able to function without them.   Frankly I missed them when I wear rings, as I feel women should have pretty hands and nails are so girly!  People notice rings and I prefer my nails to look amazing when they do!

One of my favorite parts of this coming weekend is that my son will be gaining a daughter, and he will make a great step-dad.  In fact short of the gene pool, he will be her daddy in every way, a role he is well trained for as my ex-husband was ‘dad’ to my son from before he can remember.  If he is half the dad to his new daughter that my ex was to him, he will do great.  And of course this means I am gaining a granddaughter.  I am SO excited.  She already calls him daddy, and me grandma.  I love it.  I love her and her mom (knew her mom since she was a little girl and frankly cannot believe I didn’t see way back then that this match would happen.

Naturally, being a grandma, I have to step it up now on holidays a bit.  I have already purchased somethings for her for Easter.  🙂  Yeah, like she isn’t spoiled enough already.

If you look at those eyes, there is mischief in them.  I believe she is trying to marry me off based on conversations we’ve had (see previous post. And recently, when I kept her for an evening while mommy and daddy went to dinner, we had this one:

(I was chatting on IM with Sir Lancelot at the time and she sat down next to me on the couch)

Little Miss Mischief Photo by Penny Hodge Photography http://www.pennyhodgephotography.net

Ryann:  Who is that, grandma? (she could see his photo in the IM window)

Marti:  He is a friend of mine.

Ryann:  What’s his name?

Marti:  Sir Lancelot.

Ryann:  Is he your boyfriend?

Marti:  Not exactly.

Ryann:  Why not?

Marti:  I don’t have a boyfriend, sweetie.

Ryann:  Well why not?

Marti:  Because grandma doesn’t want a boyfriend, I’m not dating anyone right now, I took the whole year off from that.

Ryann:  Well HE can be your boyfriend then!

Marti:  NO he can’t.

Ryann: Why not?

Marti:  It’s complicated.

Ryann:  Are you going to marry him?

Marti:  (hiding that terrified look again) Um, no, I don’t want to get married right now.

Ryann:  Well, marry him later!  🙂

Marti:  Not likely sweetheart.

Ryann:   I think you should.

Marti:  It’s just not that easy, honey.

See what I mean?  I really need to watch this kid, she is seriously into the match making game here, it’s a bit frightening!  She goes at this like it’s her job.

I also think it best if I not leave her alone with Sir Lancelot for so much as a second!  I don’t want her giving him any crazy ideas either.

My son and his beautiful bride. Photo by Penny Hodge Photography http://www.pennyhodgephotography.net

Because I am always asked, my snake ring is from Avon, visit my store by clicking the name below if you’d like to purchase one:
Wild Safari Critter Ring – Snake