Posted in 30 Days of Thankfulness 2012

Day 2 ~ 30 Days Of Thankfulness 2012

I am thankful for the technology we have today.  I can text with someone in Hawaii, chatting as it were in real time!  I can get on my computer and use Skype to talk via live stream video with a friend or relative,  there is an app for just about anything and everything you can think of, including birthday candles in case you forgot to buy them when you picked up the cake.   Even GPS on our phones that is pinging cell towers that can help track down a lost person if their phone is on.  I am absolutely blown away by it all and love it all as well.  Guess rather than be overwhelmed the ADD in me cannot get enough of the newest, coolest technology crack as it is released!  All of which helps me stay connected to family and friends.  Yes, I could pick up a phone and call, but with a family that all works odd shifts, this way questions and reaching out to touch someone can be done and responded too far more easily.  And then not to mention the new friends I’ve made around the world via the various social media available.  I love technology and I am so thankful for it!

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Posted in Plinky

Talking Versus Texting: My Preference

I am evenly divided on this, depends on the situation.

When I am at work I don’t have time for personal calls, things are usually on the hectic side and my work is often very detailed. I cannot afford the mental interruptions from calls much of the time. I prefer texting when at work, as I am able to reply when I have a moment to break concentration. I have the text there on the phone and can respond when the time is appropriate.

I prefer conversation to texting for some situations as tone of voice is critical to understanding and when something is of a touchy or serious nature I want to talk in person so I can read facial expressions as well. It is best to be seeing what is in the eyes in those situations.

I confess I am a social media addict, using Text, Twitter, Facebook and Foursquare often to the extremes. My email also comes across my cell phone so I am ‘connected’ all around.

All that said, I don’t do these things and drive!!! If the car is in motion the phone is NOT in my hand.

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Posted in Wine & Cheese

Wine & Cheese – 13th Serving

Every week on Wednesday I  devote a blog to whining.  Despite being a really happy, positive person, I do have things that annoy me at times.  I never let anything grate on my nerves for long but thought it would be fun to vent them periodically in my blogs.

I also feel that good things, the cheese in life, should be acknowledged as well.

I’m even going to throw in a bit of dessert, a piece of virtual chocolate, something that made me laugh or smile  just a bit more than normal.

Sit back and join me now for the 13th serving of some wine and cheese!

WINE

Traffic Light Forfeiting

I swear every day I can see more and more reasons to ban cell phone use when driving.  Not just texting, as the city of Cincinnati has now passed an ordinance that bans texting/emailing while behind the wheel, but ANY use of cell phones while operating a motor vehicle.  Today when I headed out to pick up some lunch,  I was waiting for the light to turn left out of our office complex.  Turning left at this intersection requires waiting for the signal to give you the arrow, because someone deemed it too dangerous to make  that decision for oneself.  Likely due to idiots like the one I observed waiting to turn left INTO the complex.  Two cars were in that turn lane waiting on the arrow, and believe me this is a long wait, I have to endure it every morning.  I could balance my check  book during the wait and if you know me you know that takes a while.  When at last the signal changed the first car pulled away and turned into the office complex.  The  second car never moved.  I began to wonder if the driver had died at the wheel when I looked closer and could see he was so busy texting he did not realize the light had not only changed but that the car in front of him was gone.  I am not entirely certain he ever did realize he had sat through the long awaited opportunity because by the time I got the light to turn out he was still keying something into his phone, oblivious to the fact that he was one and a half car lengths from the stopping line and occupying the  turn  lane all alone now.  THAT is just plain ridiculous.  Anyone that absorbed in a text conversation should not  be driving.  Put the phone on silent and put it down and concentrate on driving the car.  And please, never, never, NEVER be in front of me at a light, or behind me while in motion, I don’t think you are safe.

What Not To Wear – Ever

If you are a man pay attention to this please.  Unless you work out on a regular basis and are muscular and solid, please do not wear wife beater shirts out in public and think you look hot.  Seriously if you have man dinners peaking through your shirt (man boobs), you have no business being seen in this shirt out in a public place.  And when you need suspenders to hold your pants up to go along with this shirt, then dear gawd go purchase a full length mirror and take a good look at yourself.  If you are over weight that is fine, but please, consider those of us that have to look at you when you use one of your dumb pick-up lines.  We do not find you attractive, you not a hunka hunka burning love.  You have bigger tits than an NFL cheerleader, cover that train wreck of a physique up please!!  I’d gouge out my eyes or pour bleach in them but the image is burned in my mind for life.  You won’t see my big butt in Daisy Dukes or spandex shorts, gain some fashion sense!

Sam Witches

No,  they are not a new Halloween treat, or decoration.  It is a total mispronunciation of the word sandwich.   S A N D W I C H.   Read it again,  S A N D W I C H.   Note that there is no ‘M’ in that word, sandwich.   It is is NOT pronounced ‘sam witch’, there is no such thing as a samwhich, samwitch, or samwich.  It is a SANDWICH.  The ‘D’ is not soft.  Say it with me, SAND,  and now this part, WICH.  It makes me flipping crazy when people order a samwich or tell me they made a ham and cheese samwich for lunch.   There is no such thing, even dictionary.com did not list it as slang.  One more time, try it, SANDWICH…..thank you.

CHEESE

Nothing is quite as nice as finding money you forgot you had.  In your jeans pocket, stashed behind your drivers license for a rainy day, or in my case opening your ashtray to figure out what is rattling around and discovering a nice handful of change!!!  Obviously I don’t use mine for ashes as I do not smoke.  I forgot that is the ex-hubby’s favorite place to dump change and the other day was trying to figure out what I was hearing in the car when I opened the ashtray and discovered about $2 in change. YA ME!!!

Recently I stumbled across a blog page that caught my eye, because they had developed a FUN way to shrink your jeans…by sizes. Shrinkvivor is like the show Survivor but online and for losing some weight. This is so cool and I cannot wait for it to begin tomorrow! My sister, a fellow blogger, decided to get in on it too. We’re in different tribes which adds to the competition and will make this much more fun!

And last but not least, sleeping with the windows open!  While Summer is by far my favorite time of year, because I HATE being cold, I have to admit that with the gradual change of seasons taking place it is SO nice to not only have the windows open and the air conditioning off, but I LOVE sleeping with the windows open.  On top of the nice breeze while I sleep, and the night sounds of crickets and tree frogs, my kitten is able to occupy herself when she isn’t sleepy by watching out the window, which beats her climbing on the night stand or dresser to pounce on me when I’m sleeping.

DESSERT

I have NO clue of the  origin, but this was too funny not to share.  Longer than the usual dessert I serve up but very enjoyable!

Amazing Grace

As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man.  He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper’s cemetery in the Eastern Oregon back country.

As I was not familiar with the backwoods,  I got lost and, being a typical man,  I didn’t stop for directions.   I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone and the hearse was nowhere in sight.  There were only the diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch.  I felt badly and apologized to the men for being late.

I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place.  I didn’t know what else to do, so I started to play. The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around.  I played out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. I played like I’ve never played before for this poor, homeless man.

And as I played ‘Amazing Grace,’ the workers began to weep.  They wept, I wept, we all wept together. When I finished I packed up my bagpipes and started for my car.  Though my head hung low, my heart was full. As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, “I ain’t never seen nothin’ like that before and I’ve been putting in septic tanks for twenty years.”

Apparently I’m still lost…

Posted in Wine & Cheese

Wine & Cheese – 10th Serving

Every week on Wednesday I  devote a blog to whining.  Despite being a really happy, positive person, I do have things that annoy me at times.  I never let anything grate on my nerves for long but thought it would be fun to vent them periodically in my blogs.

I also feel that good things, the cheese in life, should be acknowledged as well.

I’m even going to throw in a bit of dessert, a piece of virtual chocolate, something that made me laugh or smile  just a bit more than normal.

WINE

Mobile Nasal Minners

I follow a blogger, Kristina, over at The Ten Minute Missive and she blogged about observing things people do in their car seemingly unaware they are being watched. Much to my surprise, one she left out that drives me bonkers is nose pickers!  Or nasal miners as she put it and I’m borrowing it because that is funny stuff right there.  And don’t you know, after commenting on the blog Monday, I am then headed to work on Tuesday morning and stop for a red light.  Glancing back in the review mirror I was treated to the vision of a man in his mid to late 20’s with fully half of his index finger buried in his nose!  I tried to look away but when I again glanced up at this train wreck he was holding his nostril open with both hands, trying to peer up his nose in his review mirror, then went mining for more!  SERIOUSLY???? Do you not realize that everyone around you is watching you while you dig in your facial cavern?  OMG and then? YES dear readers, you guessed it, apparently this is where he hides his breakfast because he proceeded to consume whatever morsel he found encased in his sinus cavity! AHHHHHHH!!! For crying out loud, if you must pick your nose, do not do this in the car and please, deposit the goods in a tissue, wipe it on your pants leg, whatever but please do  not eat it!!!!  I was tempted to walk back and offer him some wheat bread and a napkin from my lunch bag as I was pretty sure after that display I was not going to be hungry again anytime soon.

Tanning Bed Tell Alls

When I have the luxury of paying to fake-bake my ample rear in the tanning bed at the local vitamin D salon, I go there to relax.  I turn OFF my cell phone ringer, put on some bronzer, turn on the radio, the fan and lay back for a relaxing, 20 minute warm, naked nap.  NEVER fails as I’m in my virtual paradise watching Juan, the hot ass pool boy clean my cement pond, that a drama queen lands in the room next to mine and,  while worshiping the imitation sunshine on her side of the wall, she gets on her cell phone and launches into a minute by minute update on her soap opera romance to her totally bestest girlfriend….at the top of her lungs!! Just when I am about to seduce Juan out of his swim trunks the vision is gone as the Lindsay Lohan wannabe screeches out details to the entire establishment of her misguided love.  First if you must talk on the phone while tanning, lower the volume on your highly irritating voice.   Cats fighting is more soothing than the sounds coming forth from your vocal cords.  UV rays are bad for the phone display, and though mommy will likely buy you a new one right away if you ruin that one, you could miss an important text from lover boy if the screen ceases functioning, so maybe put that thing away?  Besides, some of us are trying to sleep and enjoy our well mannered, sexy fantasy guys over here, so STFU!!!!

Daddy Daycare???

I have a bone to pick with the dads out there.  I am SO sick of hearing dads refer to spending time with the kids, while mommy is away, as babysitting.  News Flash: YOU are dad, YOU are the other half of the parental unit, half of their biological gene pool.  Your time is called PARENTING. You are  not a babysitter.  You are their father, you are just as responsible as the mother for changing the kids diapers, feeding them, getting their meals, changing their clothes, kissing boo boos and applying a band-aid, anything that mom can do you can do too! You can load the dishwasher, do laundry, and care for the kiddos too, dad, your job did not stop at ejaculation.  Start acting like a parent and get involved with them, daddy!

CHEESE

SPIRIT WEAR In The Mail!

YIPPIE!!! My personalized Bengals jersey is  definite  cheese for me!   Made my whole day to come home and find it had  arrived,  as ordered.  I cannot wait to wear it! 🙂

Money In The  Mail!

Who cares if  it is only $2?  It is cash and with no strings attached.  Okay a small guilt string, a poll about beer (oh darn the luck) and they hope that the cash will be an incentive to respond to the poll.  And I will!  But yeah for money in the mail!

Banana Split!

We broke down and tried this new Mayfield ice cream we kept hearing about, and we in the Diva Den are SOLD!  This is good stuff, especially the Banana Split!!!  AND we get a free carton as the company is so sure you will love  their  product that they buy the first one!  Sure you have to send in the receipt and UPC but so what?  It was that good we want more!

DESSERT

While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display
Of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since
I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband’s
Advice.

‘What do you think?’ I asked. ‘Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?’

‘Better get a bikini,’ he replied. ‘You’d never get it all in one.’

He’s still in intensive care.

Posted in My Crazy Life

Venting Some Pet Peeves

Okay I am jumping up on my soap box this morning and venting a bit about a few things that just drive me bonkers.  All of these have been pet peeves for some time but are fresh in my head this morning because I’ve encountered them all in the past 12 hours.

Let us start with shopping carts left in parking spaces.  Every retail store I’ve ever shopped has multiple cart corrals, places throughout the parking lot for placing your shopping cart when you finish unloading your purchases into your car.  This prevents run away carts crashing into other people’s cars, or filling up otherwise available parking spaces.   Shoppers who can walk the entire mega store  yet cannot walk an extra 30 feet to put their carts in the appropriate place.   Seriously many of them could use a few of those 30 foot walks, they have an exceedingly large amount of junk in the trunk and that little stroll to the cart corral, while it certainly has no real health benefits on its own, if they did it more often it might help!

Next is  sun delays on the highway.  Every morning from early spring until late fall, people on the highways driving into the rising sun cause traffic nightmares when they are unable to see.  The reason they cannot see is the sun is shining right in their field of vision.  These same people drive this same route every single work day and never does it cross their minds to purchase a pair of sunglasses.  They have one hand holding their $8 latte and the other alternating between steering and blocking the sun from their eyes.  The car drifts around their lane, and into other lanes, they hit their brakes because they cannot see and without fail there are near misses and some days rear end collisions all because these people are too cheap to go out and purchase a pair of sunglasses.  There are some that are wearing fashion accessories that resemble sunglasses but are useless beyond making them look impressive.  Well maybe not so, as there is nothing impressive about driving along resembling someone that is heavily intoxicated because you cannot see.  I fail to understand how this can happen to the same people every single weekday and yet they never purchase sunglasses.  They blow countless dollars on over priced coffee every day and cannot splurge for a $15 or $20 pair of dark, effective shades for their eyes.  ARGH!!!!

Right up there with the highway sun warriors is the elite group that THINK they can handle driving while talking on their cell phones, or worse yet texting while driving.  And before you puff up your chests boys, the vast majority of crap drivers while talking on the phone is MEN.  Not that the multi-tasking experts, women, are any better at controlling their vehicles while gabbing on the phone, but the majority of offenders I see every day on the highway are men.  I cannot tell you how many change lanes without looking, drift over the marker lines for their lanes and back, speed up then slow way down, all the while holding the phone to their ear with one hand and gesturing with the other.  Really you not only do not look important as you drive along talking but you are a danger to everyone around you.  Get a damn blue tooth if there is really something SO important it cannot wait until you are off the road or arrive at your destination.  I get that sometimes we all have some reason to be on the phone while in the car (though that is up for debate as we got by just fine without cell phones for a long time), but get a hands free device.  The kicker is the people that are sipping their latte, without sunglasses and talking on the phone! Then trying to read a newspaper or sales report at the same time while driving 65mph in the 55mph zone, oblivious to anything but themselves!

That brings me to another driving disaster…women applying their makeup while driving.  REALLY???? You couldn’t get out of bed 10 minutes earlier so you could doll up before you get in the car?  You sit at red lights then through half of the green light while applying mascara or eyeliner, nearly rear end others putting on your lipstick all because  you are so self absorbed in your appearance in the mirror and not watching the road.  You are driving a car, for crying out loud woman DRIVE THE CAR! Put your face on in the bathroom at home, or in the parking lot at work, NOT while operating a motor vehicle.  And yes, I’ve seen them with the latte in one hand, cell phone tucked under their chin, putting on their eye shadow, driving and shielding their unprotected eyes all with the other hand ON THE DAMN HIGHWAY!

If you are behind the wheel, DRIVE THE CAR.  If you need to arrange for dinner reservations, call when you are in the parking lot or at your desk.  Skip a few lattes and splurge on a pair of sunglasses and a blue tooth. And when you are finished shopping put the flipping cart in the appropriate place!

Ok all done venting, have a swell day!