Meet Me On Monday

Welcome to the 50th edition of “Meet Me On Monday!” Blogging  is a funny thing…we tell our most intimate thoughts for all to read  and yet most of the time I find myself sitting and wondering, “who is  this person!?”  I know them…but yet I don’t know them!  I want  to know who the person is behind all those words so I thought of a great  way for all of us to “meet” each other!

Every Sunday Never Growing Old will post five get to know you  questions that you can copy and paste into your own Monday post and we  can all learn a little more about each and every one of us!!

Java will add a linky so we can follow who participates and get to know them  better!!  Be sure to link the POST and not just your whole blog!!

If you have a question suggestion please email: nevergrowingold@hotmail.com and if she uses your question she’ll will give you a shout out! 

Questions:

1.  What is your favorite food?
2.  What color scheme is your bedroom?
3.  Do you carry a donor card?
4.  In your opinion, is the glass half empty or half full?
5.  Vanilla or Chocolate?
—————————————————————
My Answers!

1. What is your favorite food?

Seriously hard to nail down just one, as I LOVE food!  But by far one of my all time favorites is a Chipotle steak bowl with rice, black beans, corn salsa and cheese.  Only variation in what I get there is sometimes chicken rather than steak.  Oh and always chips, I use the chips to scoop and eat! YUM!

2.  What color scheme is  your bedroom?

The walls are painted Chai Latte, kind of a warm peach color.  All accents (curtains, bedding etc) are black and white.  I love my room, it is my nest and haven.

3.  Do you carry a donor card?

No, but my drivers license is flagged as an organ donor.  I am a huge supporter of organ  donation as a dear friend’s son was born with heart valve issues and required a valve replacement at 5 months old.  Someone  had to lose their precious child of 3 years old, but they lovingly gave the gift of life to countless other children by donating parts of that angel.  I cannot imagine NOT donating my organs.  Or blood on a regular basis for that matter!

4.  In your opinion, is the glass half empty or half full?

Full…only far more than half, about 95% full.  And I believe that is all attitude.  It isn’t our circumstances,  it is how we respond to them that makes life great!

5.  Vanilla or  Chocolate?

Chocolate…preferably dark chocolate.  :)

The Dating Diaries ~ First Date Story by Chuck

It should be noted that I may have to offer Chuck his own page on this blog.  I personally love  his style and humor, it plays well in the sandbox (he doesn’t throw the sand, smack others with his dump truck or shovel and bucket, and isn’t a cat so doesn’t view this as a litter box…we have good chemistry going here!)  I leave you this morning with Chuck, while I go find coffee and get a shower and get ready to take on this day….

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

I have a first date story that I’d like to share.

Testing a comment made previously on this blogger’s site, I was compelled to test the “Welcome Home” theory.

My first date was walking into the appointed meeting place as I pulled up. Acting quickly, I beeped and waved. Well done me! She turned away from the door and started walking towards my car. My plan is working. I would much rather meet someone for the first time anonymously and away from others. There’s just something about meeting someone for the first time from a sitting position, a sitting in a restaurant or otherwise type of establishment that I’m uncomfortable with. As if one of us has been sitting there for a time alone has somehow drawn the attention of others. Hence, now our meeting is a show for the entertainment enjoyment of those already there and with someone! I’ve recognized those situations myself, and likewise take great interest in the opportunity to observe two strangers meeting.

So… as I got out my car and walked towards her in the relative anonymity provided by the establishment’s parking lot/building front my immediate thoughts were of her hair, her smile, and her eyes. Wild arse hair, great smile, and beautifully gifted eyes. I’m not one to ogle, so I didn’t check to see if the smile on her face went all the way to her toes as was claimed previously on this blogger’s site. However, I did note later when she showed me her lower back tat, the smile went at least that far… but I digress as is my tendency to do.

So back to my first meeting… As I approached, she smiled and held out her hand for the obligatory “shake”. I shook that off and went in for the ostensible “church hug”… after all, it was Sunday and no one refuses a church hug on Sunday. It has been my experience that “hello hugs”, while not necessarily taboo are generally not part of a “meeting you for the first time” greeting… at least in the virtual dating world. But that may have something to do with the virtual vs. actual touching thing where touching another person may absolutely ruin a good virtual experience. The hug was a bit awkward at first… I believe each of us had one arm up and one arm down but other than that, all I will say is that I was able to move my hands up and down her back a few times while contemplating the question, “do I feel ‘Welcome Home’?” Note I had driven an hour to get there and had just recently navigated a hairpin turn on a steep hill the likes of which have probably failed many an Oak Hills High School student driver. I won’t even mention the bus transfers, losing my luggage at the train station, and being pawed by the TSA lady I match dated once a few years back. Nonetheless, I knew for certain I was deep in the Westside… Like Charlie Sheen in Apocalypse Now, a near drop off from civilization… I think I smelled Indiana.

Again, back to “the hug” and the end of this story… what I felt is what I wanted to feel, and that was to be comfortable and comforted. That may sound strange but believe me it was exactly where I was at today. Maybe “Welcome Home” only happens at home… and I’m definitely okay with that concept. I also want to make one last point before going to bed (good thing I took a nap today… it will help at work tomorrow). She talks fast, upbeat, and with excitement… a conversational pace and style very similar to my own. Actually, even my use of the “ellipsis” or “…” in writing is simply a reflection of a conversational style of both wanting to provide further detail on a subject yet move on all at the same time (ADA, multitasking, call it what you will). But in general, the “…” notes that more was said or done in that interval and there may be more to come… which in case you’ve not been reading there is yet more to come…

The Dating Diaries ~ Hello Again, Chuck!

As you may recall, I  had been dialoging with a reader, named Chuck, who sought out my advice because I am a possible person of interest to him so damned brilliant, about asking me some doubtlessly magnificent chick out on a date.  He then took a hiatus for a reconnection with a past love, but he has returned to the dating scene and is back to corresponding with me via comments on blog posts.  He recently commented on my Letter To My Future Husband about our wedding vows.  As is the  case when Chuck leaves me a comment, I’m going to respond, because we have such fun doing this!

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Dear Marvelous, Sexy, Wonderfully Sweet Marti, (artistic liberty taken again)

So when you say those vows… try not to blink uncontrollably, as my 2nd and 3rd wife did (she was the same person… I shoulda known), as the uncontrollable blinking shows the whole sincerity part is already lost. But what do you do then? What do you do when you realize at the last possible moment you are alone at the alter. You move forward in your new marriage saying I can change that… that’s what I did anyway. From “for better…” to “…in health”.

Seriously though, those are some great vows… while I’ve not lived them perfectly myself, I have lived them and I do have those expectations for my future. What’s interesting about vows is that many people look at them as if they are just words in a sentence when it comes to their day to day lives. The concept of belonging to one another takes on a negative connotation… my future bride will read “Love and Respect”. And she will understand my basic need for respect as I understand her basic need for love. Sometimes I do not know if I’ll ever be up for that again, but if I found her, The One, all those doubts would fade away.  I’m absolutely certain that the doubts I have in others, that I carry on my shoulders like weights of gold vaulted up for protection, a sword held high and a shield held out will fall with a resounding crash to the earth and I will be whole again.  Oh yeh, another thing that will always be certain about my bride, she will like watching Red’s games on TV with me at sports bars and stuff!

Chuck

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Dear Handsome Stranger,

Ah yes, those moments at the alter when everything in us screams run like hell yelling “no way, not happening, I MOST DEFINITELY DO NOT”, and yet we stand there and say “I do”.    It sucks donkey jewels when we don’t listen to our inner voice,  doesn’t it?  Usually they are costly lessons, either of paying dearly for sticking with it or for letting go of the best thing that will ever happen to us. (many are the men that are thankful regret not hanging on to me, as I indeed am the worst nightmare best thing that can happen to any male of  the  species!)

Maybe we should get together and compare notes (strictly for research purposes of course)?  I know of some great sports bars that happen to air the Cincinnati Reds games.

Oh..and by chance is that book available on Kindle??  ;)

Your Favorite Go-To Girl With A  “Make them whole  again”  Glue Gun,

Marvi Marti

Friday Featured Friend

Friday Featured Friend Feline

Today I am featuring one of the Diva Den cats, Ms. Ditzy, who feels she  needs a soap box to air some grievance she has with me.  So, I decided to let her have at it.  She is our 3rd, and for now, final cat addition.  Roughly 6 months old, we refer to her as our ‘special’ cat, as in mentally touched.  She is NOT the brightest bulb in the box.  Here she is with her first post:

Greetings to all of you, my name is Goddess, you may call me Princess.  I am well aware that the staff refer to me as ‘Ditzy’ but that is their disrespectful name for me.  I am royalty, after all.  I mean, look at that photo, that is a true Princess, don’t you agree?  Of course you do.

I’m more than just a tiny bit miffed of late at the staff member that feeds us fabulous felines,  the one you know as Marvi Marti.  As far as her duties of feeding us, we give her a ‘C+’.  Too many evenings she arrives back at the palace late,  or just seems to forget us, how rude!

But it isn’t her lack of attention to our food dishes that has my tail puffed up like a Christmas tree.  It is her inability to accept that the one she refers to as Mr. Wonderful, belongs to ME!  He is the staff member in charge of entertaining me, and my most adored play thing.  SHE thinks he is here for  her and frequently distracts him from his duties: playing games with me.  It brushes my fur the wrong way, and it simply must stop!

My very favorite game is fetch.  Stop gasping, we cats taught the game to dogs, they just try to pretend they thought of it first.  Seriously, dogs have  no brains whatsoever.  Kick them and the fools come back wagging their tails.  Kick us? OH big mistake, we will poo in your bed, chew the tassels off your favorite shoes, fling the litter box contents all over, or trip you in attempts to kill you on the stairs.  We cats are gods, get used to it.  We punish those that serve us when they are incompetent or anger us.

Let me tell you what this not so marvelous one does.  My man-toy arrives and as the staff opens the door, there I am sitting pretty as can be near the door awaiting his adoration.  What does the Marvi do? Steps in between he and I and into his arms, making him hold and kiss her.  I know, right? HOW RUDE!!!  Then he tries to appease me after the wench has gotten her fill.  REALLY not happy about this at all.

Do you think she is at all lagging in making sure he has something to eat? OH no!  She will wait on his every need, getting him a drink and even turns her phone off and puts her computer away.  Unless of course he wants to dance with her, then he puts on romantic music and turns the lights down and dances with her, even singing to her!  Do you think he ever thinks to hold me and dance  with me, the goddess he is here to entertain? OH no, she has him all to herself and refuses to give him up!

The past three evenings he has come over to play games with me and entertain my wonderful self.  At first, once she was done slobbering all over him at the door, he sat on the floor throwing my crinkle.  I impressed him with my abilities to jump and twist in the air (we taught dogs to do that while chasing frisbees), then landing feather light on my paws.  I would walk all regally back to him, dropping the crinkle at his side allowing him to continue our little game.  While retrieving the crinkle, I find SHE has once again diverted his focus to HER.  There he is, head in her lap while she is rubbing his head and cooing at him!  Or worse yet, has  her head in HIS lap while he is rubbing her head!  REALLY????  And do you think he requests a back scratch from me,  the one with the natural claws? OH no, he asks her, the lowly food wench,  to use her fake talons to scratch his lovely, muscled and tattooed back.  It makes me want to heave up a hairball in her shoes.

One would think this staff member would be tripping over herself to please me after stealing my man-toy, but no, she continues to ignore every opportunity to pay me homage.  She has a window kitty cat television right next to the desk lounging platform in her sleep chambers.  There are few things we felines enjoy like watching our kitty TV.  Do you think she raises the blinds turns it on when I paw the ledge and ‘meow’? Oh no,  she shoos me of the room and closes the door.  She doesn’t seem to grasp that there are NO doors ever to be closed to us of tailed divinity.  NONE of our staff seems to understand this.  HUMANS! Such simple minded low life they are.

What’s Growing Under My Feet???

Mama's Losin' It

“The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance; the wise man grows it under his feet.” — James Oppenheim

LESSON LEARNED

 

I am no stranger to adversity, pain and a broken heart, my life path has encountered these on more than a few occasions and sometimes, through my own fault.  But one thing these bumps in the broken road have taught me is that happiness is right where I am.

I married the starter hubby at 19, full of Cinderella dreams that came crashing down soon after the engagement.  Hey, when the groom shows up to the wedding drunk, it MIGHT be a sign that you should yank up those skirts and run like hell for the hills.  My daddy even leaned over and whispered something to the effect that it wasn’t too late to kick off those heels and bolt if I was so inclined.  I missed that less than subtle hint, and I guess everyone thought I was aware that my very soon to be husband was plastered.  I wasn’t even remotely aware that the ridiculous grin on his face had zero to do with making me his wife, and everything to do with  over consumption of alcohol until communion, when he downed the entire chalice of wine himself.  We had already said our vows, were legally wed….EPIC FAIL!

Then I met and became legally bound again a few years later and once again had blissful dreams of happily ever after.  While married I was happy, and loved him very much. But it was all a dream while I slept for those years.

When Sleeping Beauty awoke from that beautiful dream, a shattered heart was the reality.  But it didn’t take me long to pull from memory and stop dreaming of somewhere over the rainbow in the distance and start finding happiness right there in my own back yard (thank you Dorothy).  There, in my present reality, I found happiness.   In those people that chose to wrap around me in love and support, I found comfort.  In the little things like the sun shining, a great song on the radio, a scoop of my favorite ice cream, or a special text from my niece* when I went home before we all moved into one house, I found happiness growing under my feet.  As it grew like a vine it wrapped around me, and on bare branches roses of hope and joy bloomed.

I am a fairly easy person to please, pretty low maintenance.  I don’t need a lot to make me happy.  A favorite candy bar, a warm hug and a really deep kiss, my hand wrapped in someone else’s, the giggles of the kids in the neighborhood as they play outside, the purr of my cat in my ear when she wants me to wake up and scratch her head, my daughter’s dog running at me all excited to see mommy (gotta love visitation with the pooch!), curled up with a cup of coffee and the Divas on a winter morning in front of the fire place, or on a starry night on our deck, a sweet text “good night” or “good morning”, hugs from the twin 6yo nieces, these are the things that are now, under foot, growing the REAL happiness in life, in the current moment.

 

*one night when I left the Divas, while preparing to move out of the Black Hole’s galaxy, my niece texted me, “don’t lose your green card, we want you back!”.  It made me tear up to know someone wanted me.

 

A Walk In The Park

It is SO nice  outside today, 59 degrees here  in the Queen City!!!  That called for a walk.  I cruised up to my favorite park of walking trails.  I admit, some areas were slushy and snow covered, some kind of soupy, but I was OUTSIDE and not freezing.  I was also walking, something I need to be doing!  And it felt fantastic!  25 fitness minutes on the trails now logged in my fitness minutes on SparkPeople.

Here are some of the sights, I cannot wait until summer when it is green again, and the  trails are dry!

 

 

Where Is The Food????

Okay I’m not really starving, but I am facing a harsh reality.  There is a big reason my butt is growing so big and my jeans are getting snug:  mega portions!

Over the past 3 days I’ve been adding my foods to my SparkPeople nutrition tracker and noticing that if I actually measure out my portions, holy heffers no wonder I’m weighing in at 170!!!!  Okay so I know if we eat appropriate portions we’d likely all start dropping pounds, but DAMN!  I measured out my Special K cereal this morning, 3/4 cup and 1/2 cup of vitamin D milk.   Then I looked at the tiny bowl in which it was waiting for me to dive in.  Tiny bowl is what I chose so that it appeared full.  It was full.  It still appeared rather small…too small.  It isn’t hard to see that my usual portion would be about 3 times that much.  SIGH.

I have had  no major issued getting my water intake up to the 64 ounces a day, that is a piece of cake for me.  But taking time to measure out my foods is another story, and staying focused.  My pink heart post it note on my mirror still is a #1.  I didn’t go on with my workouts.  I know I know,  don’t give up, just do it today and start over.  I AM going to do that!   It is hard to establish a new routine and stick to it though, and I’m quickly meeting my resistance on the road to a more fit self.  I refuse to give up!

One place I DO need to starve myself is my social network addictions connections.  It likely is somewhat related to my expanding bum!   Last night Diva Mom, Boo, me and my daughter had dinner then went shopping for a bit.  I went out of the door without my most prized appendage…my cell  phone.  I  experienced varying degrees of withdraw, especially when we had to stop at the Verizon store on the way to Target.  There, in a valley of cell phones, I was naked.  I had to touch my daughter’s for a moment so I could keep breathing and hold back the panic attack.  Then when we came home we watched Police Women of Cincinnati, CSI: NY, and then CSI (we DVR’d them).  When I crawled in bed I realized my usual nightlight was not glowing from the desk…my laptop.  I had gone an entire evening from the time I left the office without being on the computer.  I think hell must of experienced a frost warning, the Packers may win the Super Bowl, and I should go buy a lottery ticket.  An entire evening without the computer??? Be afraid, be VERY afraid.

Time to get my life train back on the track from its derailment.  Obviously I’ve gotten my priorities in life completely out of whack, but now it is time to refocus!

On that note, time to change the sheets, get myself together, and go buy yarn. I have blankets to finish!

MEMETASTIC – THE TRUTH REVEALED!

Yesterday I put up the 5 ‘facts’ for readers to determine which one of the 5 was true.  The idea was to show my skill at embellishing things, criteria for the acceptance of the MEMETASTIC award.  Any believable tale must have a grain of truth in order for it to at least seem like it could indeed be fact.

I posted 5 facts, each with just enough truth to be believed as possibly true, but only one was true.  Time for the big reveal!!!

:: DRUM ROLL::

TRUE OR GREATLY EMBELISHED FALSE?

F :)  Everyone who reads my posts knows that I am a reformed cat hater.  Call me the Crazy Cat Lady, I love the little fur balls now.  We have 3 cats in our home, all females.  While we aren’t overly picky about which breed of feline we have, we insist that they all have to be polydactyl cats!  Yes each of our kittens has more than the normal amount of toes on their paws!  Usually cats have 5 toes on their front paws, ours have 6 or 7 depending on the cat.  Nothing normal about the Diva Den, why would we have normal cats?

While it is a fact that I am reformed from hating cats, loving them to pieces, we do not have a single polydactyl (aka Hemingway) among them.  Frankly the last thing we need is a cat who has anymore reason to presume itself special!

F :)  I love being pampered, and one of the ways in which I pamper myself is getting my nails done.  I have had acrylic nails nearly ongoing for about 7 years now.  I never got pedicures often, too expensive and frankly I don’t have real cute feet so why draw attention to them was my thought.  Recently I noticed a trend at the nail salon in which women are getting acrylic nails on their feet!!  I finally gave in and decided I have nothing to lose so had them done on my toes.  For the first time I feel like I have great feet, all nicely painted on those picture perfect, acrylic nails.  Now, I love my feet, and if it was not so cold I’d have flip flops on already to show them off!

It is true, I have had my nails done for years, and love that, I find the whole getting one’s toenails done to be just kinda freaky!  NO thanks, I’ll just stick to a pedi and some pretty polish.

F :)  Two of my supporting cast, my brother Mike, and his wife, Trina, are actually both my cousins.  Mike is a cousin from my mom’s side.  His mom was one of my mother’s first cousins who was pregnant out of wedlock.  She wanted to keep him in the family, but was unable to raise him.  My parents adopted him and raised him as their own.  Trina is one of my cousins, our dad’s are brothers.  They always had a special friendship and attraction to each other growing up.  As an adult, Mike consulted with a lawyer and found that because he was a second cousin to us siblings, and not a birth child of my parents, he and Trina were not related and therefore not really cousins.  They have been happily married for 18 years and have 2 kids. So, my sister-in-law is also my cousin, and my niece and nephew are actually like 2nd cousins once removed or something weird like that.

I loved that many of you thought this was true, as it IS rather believable that it could indeed happen.  However Mike is my blood brother (all of my siblings are blood) and Trina is related by marriage only.

T :)  In a bizarre twist of fate, we grew up with a cousin as a neighbor and never knew it.  The boy behind us was around the age of one of my brothers when we were growing up.  I received a friend request from him all these years later, and did not recognize his name any longer.  He told me that he was my cousin, and had grown up in the house behind us.  I thought it was a stalker at first, since I knew the kid behind us and they were not related to us.  Turns out, my dad’s cousin had given birth out of wedlock and placed him for adoption.  All that time growing up we had a cousin living there and playing with my brothers and never knew it!

This is the true story/fact!  Growing up the kid behind us, Bobby, actually turns out was a cousin.  His birth mom and my dad are cousins.  It was all these years later that he asked to be my friend on Facebook then explained to me why.  His adoptive parents remembered our last name so when he found his birth mom, and learned his birth name,  (it is highly unique) he hunted down his unknown cousins.  Kinda cool!

F :)  One time when getting my nails done, it was taking longer than anticipated at the salon due to a high volume of customers.  I was last in line so when my now ex-husband came to pick me up they had just started my nails.  He was irritated by the delay so I convinced him, with a little help from the nail tech that was now free, to get a pedicure.   He finally gave in and found out it was a rather NICE experience.  If you have ever had one, you know that they will put clear polish on your toe nails if you aren’t having color done.  After some teasing he acquiesced and let them paint his toe nails bright red.  He has worn them red, to my knowledge, ever since.  Turns out he found having his toe nails colored was a kind of turn on for him.

I would NEVER post something like that about Pete/ex-hubbster if that were true!  Pretty sure none of the firefighters fell for that one, as they have undoubtedly seen his feet a few times at the fire house.  He was irritated, and he did get a pedicure after a LOT of pressure (Hey, Chad Ocho Cinco gets them weekly, as do many men, more men should keep their feet looking nice!!) I do not believe it was an experience he ever repeated and he drew the line in the fun me and the nail techs were having (at  his expense – though he was a good sport), when it came time to polish his piggies.  He enjoyed the massage chair, the foot and calve massage, but he drew the line on nail  polish!!

There you have it, the truth and the fabrications!!

I AM A PROUD MEMETASTIC!!!!!

MEMETASTIC!!!

‘M’ over at The Professionally Insane, gave me this awesome award yesterday!

Photobucket

I have to say this is absolutely the cutest  award I’ve received!  This award is a fun one! In order to claim this award, it requires a cunning, and finely tuned skill : lying fabricating fibbing creative embellishment…

As a condition of my acceptance of this award I have to demonstrate my supurb skills by writing five facts about myself.  Four of these ‘facts’ have to be  ficticious deceptions   enhanced realities (some grain of truth but a lot of enhancements!).  But somewhere among the lies fibs fabrications falsehoods AHEM *cough*cough* ::crossing fingers behind back::  embellishments, will be one solid truth.

The next part of this acceptance is that I have to pass this onto five other bloggers. 

SO feel free to comment and let me know which fact is NOT embellished and is in fact, 100% true!  I’ll post answers this weekend!

TRUE OR GREATLY EMBELISHED FALSE?

:)  Everyone who reads my posts knows that I am a reformed cat hater.  Call me the Crazy Cat Lady, I love the little fur balls now.  We have 3 cats in our home, all females.  While we aren’t overly picky about which breed of feline we have, we insist that they all have to be polydactyl cats!  Yes each of our kittens has more than the normal amount of toes on their paws!  Usually cats have 5 toes on their front paws, ours have 6 or 7 depending on the cat.  Nothing normal about the Diva Den, why would we have normal cats?

:)  I love being pampered, and one of the ways in which I pamper myself is getting my nails done.  I have had acrylic nails nearly ongoing for about 7 years now.  I never got pedicures often, too expensive and frankly I don’t have real cute feet so why draw attention to them was my thought.  Recently I noticed a trend at the nail salon in which women are getting acrylic nails on their feet!!  I finally gave in and decided I have nothing to lose so had them done on my toes.  For the first time I feel like I have great feet, all nicely painted on those picture perfect, acrylic nails.  Now, I love my feet, and if it was not so cold I’d have flip flops on already to show them off!

:)  Two of my supporting cast, my brother Mike, and his wife, Trina, are actually both my cousins.  Mike is a cousin from my mom’s side.  His mom was one of my mother’s first cousins who was pregnant out of wedlock.  She wanted to keep him in the family, but was unable to raise him.  My parents adopted him and raised him as their own.  Trina is one of my cousins, our dad’s are brothers.  They always had a special friendship and attraction to each other growing up.  As an adult, Mike consulted with a lawyer and found that because he was a second cousin to us siblings, and not a birth child of my parents, he and Trina were not related and therefore not really cousins.  They have been happily married for 18 years and have 2 kids. So, my sister-in-law is also my cousin, and my niece and nephew are actually like 2nd cousins once removed or something weird like that.

:)  In a bizarre twist of fate, we grew up with a cousin as a neighbor and never knew it.  The boy behind us was around the age of one of my brothers when we were growing up.  I received a friend request from him all these years later, and did not recognize his name any longer.  He told me that he was my cousin, and had grown up in the house behind us.  I thought it was a stalker at first, since I knew the kid behind us and they were not related to us.  Turns out, my dad’s cousin had given birth out of wedlock and placed him for adoption.  All that time growing up we had a cousin living there and playing with my brothers and never knew it!

:)  One time when getting my nails done, it was taking longer than anticipated at the salon due to a high volume of customers.  I was last in line so when my now ex-husband came to pick me up they had just started my nails.  He was irritated by the delay so I convinced him, with a little help from the nail tech that was now free, to get a pedicure.   He finally gave in and found out it was a rather NICE experience.  If you have ever had one, you know that they will put clear polish on your toe nails if you aren’t having color done.  After some teasing he acquiesced and let them paint his toe nails bright red.  He has worn them red, to my knowledge, ever since.  Turns out he found having his toe nails colored was a kind of turn on for him.

Okay, now it is time to present this award to 5 other bloggers that I follow!  In no particular order mind you, just others I LOVE to creep on!

Julie – byanyothername

Cinnamon – Cinful Cinnamon’s Blog

Beth – Two Monkeys & A Washtub

Pinkim – Truly Simply Pink

Oka – The One and Only Oka

Enjoy ladies!!! Cannot wait to see your facts!

Wine & Cheese – 26th Serving

Welcome to Wine & Cheese, my weekly, Wednesday whine session.

Every week on Wednesday I devote a blog to whining. Despite being a really happy, positive person, I do have things that annoy me at times.

I never let anything grate on my nerves for long but thought it would be fun to vent them periodically in my blogs.

I also feel that good things, the cheese in life, should be acknowledged as well.

I’m even going to throw in a bit of dessert, a piece of virtual chocolate, something that made me laugh or smile just a bit more than normal.

If you’d like to read the past editions of Wine & Cheese just click HERE for all of the past postings.

Sit back and join me now for the 26th serving of some wine and cheese!

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

WHINE

:( I have to get this out of my system this morning…I AM SO SICK OF WINTER!!!!!  Sick of cold, sick of ice, sick of the @#$%^&*! SNOW!!!  Enough said, everyone is likely in agreement and what more can be said about Snowpocolypes or Snowmageden, whatever you want to call this winter storm nonsense!

:(  I am also tired of whatever this cold bug, sinus infection is, it is time for it to go bye-bye!  Finally was able to sleep last night without the aid of my Nyquil induced coma.   Now if I could just quit blowing my nose and feeling so tired I’d be happy.

:(  Brace yourselves, we’re going to talk about poop.  Cat poop to be exact.  One of these 3 felines has something very wrong in their digestive track and the smell is worse than anything I’ve experienced in a baby diaper.   Best diet program I’ve encountered, cleaning up a litter box used by a cat with a questionable issue in their bowels.  (See, one doesn’t have to be a mommy blogger to talk about poop!)

CHEESE

:)  ANTIBIOTICS!!!  The  single greatest discovery in medical history, at least in my opinion this week as it seems to be the only reason I finally started feeling better.  Can I get an AMEN?

:)  COFFEE!!!  I gotta say that right now nothing beats a fresh, hot cup of coffee in the morning.  All the better if served up in one of my favorite coffee cups!  Yep, makes your breath smell like butt, however what would the morning be without it?  It would be a sad morning without the hot cup of  java!

:)  SPARKPEOPLE!!!  I’ve neglected to use my SparkPeople account as being sick the last thing I even remotely cared about was what was being fed to my tummy.  But today we are back on the Spark, watching every little morsel that will enter through my mouth.  BRAVO ME!!!!  It is AWESOME and FREE and you will love it if you want to get fit, healthy, lose weight etc.  There is a link on the side bar over  yonder on the right –>

DESSERT

:)  :)  :)  Never do anything that you wouldn’t want to explain to the paramedics.  ~Author Unknown :)  :)  :)

Are You Red Or Pink?

It is Day 2 of the LBS 5 Day Writing Challenge. Today the question/topic is:

Are You RED or PINK?

I am definitely PINK!  As a child my bedroom was a lovely shade of Pepto Bismol PINK, it was my favorite color.  Well it still IS my all time favorite (purple runs a very close second), but for a few years I had a purple thing going on, but back to my first love I prefer PINK!

PINK is girly, and I embrace my femininity, I LOVE being a female.  I have many shades of the color in my personality.  Being a girl means it is okay to be emotional, and soft on the inside, light PINK.  But we are also permitted to be strong, courageous and tough when needed.  That would be my deep, MAGENTA side! (just another shade of PINK)

PINK might seem like a sissy color to some, and RED the very hard core and bold, but PINK is deceptive.  Keep in mind that to get the color PINK, you mix RED with WHITE.  Think of PINK as the more balanced form of our sisters that sport RED (no offense meant ladies) as we contain all the strongest characteristics of both RED (bold and flashy) and WHITE (soft and mellow).

This package? Yep I am all PINK

Don’t Play Your Tuba At Someone’s Violin Solo

 

“Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as one goes on.…” ~ Samuel Butler


I wonder if we thought about that daily, how differently we might behave?  If we were playing a violin solo, in public view, while learning to play it as we went along, most of us would be diligent to practice, and try very hard to put on a good performance.  But in the game of  life we don’t always strive to be our best, we often forget who is watching us as we perform.

When my marriage came to an end, it shocked me.  I was devastated and really took it very hard.  A marriage ending is much a like a death, and there are stages that you go through just like when losing a loved one.  In many ways I think it is harder when it is a divorce, as you have to go on and from the background you are forced to watch the other person move  on without you.  If they wanted out they are off and living their new life, often before you even know the marriage is over, so their present is often your own future.  They are going on, you are still picking up the pieces of your heart trying to figure out how to glue them all back together again and just learn to breathe.

As I moved through the grief stages I thought I did a fair job of handling things considering  no one  handed me the sheet music to play with the announcement or when we filed the paper work.  I was expected to play an unfamiliar symphony with no conductor.  In many faiths you cannot get married without going to classes.  I think classes in how to get divorced would be a great requirement in order to even file the papers to get things started.  Anyway I thought I had done a fair job of handling things.  That is until the other evening when I made a comment to my daughter about how ugly my brother’s divorce has gotten and how vindictive and mean I’ve learned his ex-wife-to-be has become.  My daughter, wise beyond her 20yrs, looked at me and said “you aren’t one to talk”.  That brought me up short.  I never saw anything I did as being  close to the ugliness I see coming from my sister-in-law.  But the more I thought about it the more I could see that my kids were impacted by my solo show, regardless of how well I thought I had played.

I could have fought hard and forced the ex to sell the house, and dragged things  through court, but while I made a lot of threats in hurt and anger, I didn’t do that.  I did send a good number of mean spirited texts and emails to my ex, often threatening to get a lawyer and fight for all I could get, but I didn’t mean them.  I never did get a lawyer, never went after anything,  I just acted out in emotional turmoil.  But what I didn’t take into account was how much my kids would see and know, or how they’d be affected, as I was  playing that violin.  There were things I said in front of them, and I’m certain there were things their dad shared that he would have been better not too.  It really caused  some issues and hurt to my daughter that I was being less than kind.  Referring to her daddy as “he who shall not be named”, “Lord Voldemort” and assorted other not so nice  nick names really did not do much good, they caused her to withdraw from me to the less  hostile environment at her daddy’s.  My son is more removed in that until last week he didn’t live at home any longer so he was able to stay fairly neutral.  He didn’t over hear either his dad or me talking to others or to one another so he wasn’t impacted like his sister.  At times I made no attempt whatsoever to play the music, I was too busy bashing the ex virtually over the head with my violin, it wasn’t a very nice performance.

A very wise man that has been through a number of divorces himself, made the comment to me  one day that divorces  usually turn into drama fests and fights because of those outside of the marriage.  The friends and relatives on both sides feed the fires with comments and opinions that would be better left unsaid.  They tend to get one side of  the story but not both, form an opinion and then pick up their tuba in an effort to enhance the production, influencing their side to go for it all, etc., embellishing the facts or even telling out and out lies, trying to make one side look bad.  In the end,  it serves no good purpose but to make a bigger mess of an on stage musical that never  should have opened the curtains.  And  in the end, the outcome is not usually changed at all by the fighting and attacks, the  courts have a pretty standard method for how things get divided up and doled out.  The only parties that hurt are those hearts  caught up in the middle, usually the kids.  Even in my late 20’s, as my own parents divorce was taking place, I heard remarks made  by friends and family members that had taken my dad’s side.  I’ve never forgotten those things, and while it is forgiven, I have no desire to be around those  that judged and pushed the drama rather than just staying neutral.

As you play your violin solo of life, keep in mind that others are hearing and watching your performance,  and often we are unaware of those in the audience.  You usually only get one shot at each piece of music you have to play, make sure that you give it your all in such a way that the critics can give you rave reviews.  Oh,  and don’t try to play your tuba during someone else’s violin solo, trust me you won’t be doing anything to enhance their performance.

 


Yawn, Hurl, Yuck…

I am EXHAUSTED.  And sick.  Some how I managed to contract the cold or whatever from hell and lose my voice.  My head is stuffed up, I am lucky to get out enough voice to even be heard, and last night had the pukey stuff to go with it.  This so is NOT what I wanted to be doing.  I wore out completely what little voice I did have by the time I finished work yesterday.  Just after crawling in bed and drifting off to sleep last night I was suddenly wide awake and very very sick.  Without much  detail it is suffice to say that  I never made it out of my room, and owe my sister big time.  I was completely unable to sleep all night between the sour stomach, mega night sweats and not being able to breathe.  I stayed home from work today and slept as much as possible.

The cats seemed to pick up on the fact that I was not well, as they all came and checked on me several times.  Noel was in bright and early this morning and groomed my hair line on my forehead.  That is a big hairy deal as she is anti-social.  Guess they were worried that the food wench (I am the one that typically feeds them both times in the day) might be on her death bed.

Ditzy napping with me

My cat slept at my feet quite often.  Then later, during an afternoon snooze,  little Ditzy kitten came and  napped with me.  She is such a doll.  While the other two will check on you, Ditzy is a cuddler and she wanted to snuggle in for her sick watch over me.  She purred for close to 20 minutes, even as she drifted to sleep, which was flat out adorable.

THE SKY IS FALLING!!! THE SKY IS FALLING!!!

If you do not live in this area, you really miss out on the fun of watching the panic that will set in as SNOWPOCOLYPSE decends.  Sometimes called White Death.  Known  to most of the nation simply as SNOW.  Yes snow, that stuff that happens in winter.  It is a typical occurrence here in the Cincinnati area, snow happens in winter.  But you’d think we lived in the Florida Keys and never seen the stuff before the way things will progress here.

It starts at the local news level, where I believe some sort of kick backs from grocery stores must take place.  For days out the weather men will begin predicting the coming snow storm (of 3 inches of snow) like they report on a pending hurricane on the coast.  The way people  will react to the news you’d think that is exactly the level of catastrophe we’re looking at taking place.  As the doom draws near, the panic begins and by the night before the  big event, insanity has taken over the minds of otherwise intelligent individuals.

Idea go / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Tomorrow there is a weather forecast of a ‘really big snow’.  Yes, this one is above average, we might get up to 7 or 8 inches of snow.  I’ll wait  while readers in areas such as Buffalo,  NY, laugh to the point of tears.  *insert pause* This type of snow fall here will paralyze this town.  In Buffalo and other areas I doubt it is even news that it snows.  Here, it is the leading story for days on end.  Because the snow is due here tomorrow, today is the day to get a front row seat at the grocery store.  In fact, park every extra car you own in the lot.  Anywhere will do, just go lay claim now to those spots.  You’ll thank me this evening when you can sell those  spots for about $20 a piece to the fearful coming to wipe out the grocery store.

Ah yes, the grocery store.  Out there, somewhere, is a winter survival guide that lists French Toast as the staple food to get one through a really bad blizzard.  I know this because by 10pm this evening there will be no bread, milk or eggs to be found in this city.  I have yet to figure out what else can be made from those 3 ingredients, but I am not exaggerating when I say the shelves will be empty.  You would be lucky to find a package of out dated, moldy hot dog buns at the back of what was once a well stocked bread aisle.  Hens cannot hope to keep up with the demand for eggs, and the cows will be drained dry.  It is frankly pathetic.   Really folks, if we are going to be snowed in for any length of time, what good are 10 loaves of bread, 8 dozen eggs and 5 gallons of milk???   Why not steak, potatoes, some veggies, dessert (ice cream!), a few cases of beer and  a few dozen bottles of wine, some snacks and a bunch of fire wood? That sounds like better choices to me.  Just saying.

I have lived in this city for 47 years.  I’ve survived the blizzards of 77 and 78.  Snow emergencies were declared at level 3, no one but the emergency personnel (cops, EMS, fire) were permitted on the  roads (mandatory snow days for adults are the best!), and at no time were we close to starving.  Possible death by BOREDOM perhaps but not from being snowed in, trapped, lost in white death.  WE HAVE SNOW PLOWS!!!! We have salt trucks!! And within 24 hours the roads will, for the most part, be reasonable.

I won’t drive in the bad stuff, my car is paid off and it is rear wheel drive.  I’m not stupid enough to chance it. But I will NOT panic.  I will curl up in a chair, sip hot cocoa & coffee, in my slippers and jammies and watch the deer that frequent our back yard, and watch the snow fall.

What I won’t be doing is watching local stations on TV.  Our local news media will report on the snow fall as if the Lord is returning.  From the time the first flake floats gracefully down to earth it will be wall to wall coverage of SNOW FALLING!  Every  local  news station will have every available reporter standing in various parking lots and at intersections throughout the city to report what we might not be aware of…OMGITISSNOWING!!!!  Yep, I am not kidding, this is big news.  I’ve said it before, if the world was coming to an end, a meteor was headed on a crash course with the earth and we were about to be destroyed before the dinner hour, we in the greater Cincinnati area would be blissfully ignorant of the impending death because OMGITISSNOWING!!!!!  Snowpocolypse is news here, BIG news.  If you are hoping to catch The Ellen Show, The View or The Young And The Restless, give it up.  God forbid the news would break away for the day from reporting that roads are getting slick and the snow is coming down.  A fact that everyone in the city aside from those under anesthesia for surgery will be well aware of simply by looking out a window!!!  This will continue until the last flake falls and the roads have been cleared, usually within about 24-36 hours.

Someone is shaking our snow globe!!! Run, Chicken Little, buy bread, milk, eggs!! The sky will be falling!!!

Meet Me On Monday

Welcome to the 31st edition of “Meet Me On Monday!” Blogging  is a funny thing…we tell our most intimate thoughts for all to read  and yet most of the time I find myself sitting and wondering, “who is  this person!?”  I know them…but yet I don’t know them!  I want  to know who the person is behind all those words so I thought of a great  way for all of us to “meet” each other!

Every Sunday Java will post five get to know you questions that you can copy and paste into your own Monday post and we  can all learn a little more about each and every one of us!!

“Its a great way to to meet new friends and for others to get to know me better….one Monday at a time!!!”….as quoted by the Chacogirl!! Java will make this SIMPLE and FUN!!!

Java  will add a linky so we can follow who participates and get to know them  better!!  Be sure to link the POST and not just your whole blog!

Questions:

1.  Do you like your ice cream in a dish, waffle cone, pretzel cone, sugar cone or cake cone?
2.  Do you read the newspaper daily?
3.  Marinara or meat sauce?
4.  Last time you cried?
5.  What word/phrase do you find really annoying?

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

1. Do you like your ice cream in a dish, waffle cone, pretzel cone, sugar cone or cake cone?

If I am eating my ice cream in a cone, it has to be a waffle cone, preferably one that the end has been dipped in chocolate and nuts or sprinkles.  The way I see it, if  I am going to indulge in something fattening I might as well go all the way with it, right?

2.  Do you read the newspaper daily?

Honestly it is rare that I bother.  If I do take time to read it then I do it online but most of the time it just ticks me off so I tend to avoid it.  On Sunday I will read the comics and browse the coupons but beyond that I have little use for the newspaper anymore.

3.  Marinara or meat  sauce?

OH meat sauce!  I am not picky if it is ground beef, chicken or turkey, as long as there is meat in that sauce, YUM!!!!

4.  Last time you cried?

Hmm..I teared up in church a few times Sunday.  And then again at home while writing my blog yesterday but that time it was happy tears.  :)

5.  What word/phrase do you really find annoying?

I truly detest this phrase, it is just dumb. Of course it is what it is, as if it is something else?

A Letter To My (Former) Best Friend

30 Day Letter Writing Challenge

Day 1 — Your Best Friend

~*~

Dear Pete/Ex-husband,

I know I said I was not going to mention you in my blogs anymore, but I did give the ‘unless it is positive’ disclaimer.  Besides, when this topic came up you were the most recent best friend so you won by default.

Simon Howden / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I don’t know if my suspicions and all the rumors and ‘scoops’ given to me about you near the end of our marriage were true or not, but that is all water under the bridge.  I know nothing happens that is not meant too and for whatever reason, the time for the end of our marriage came about.  I know I reacted poorly on many occasions throughout that process of hearing from you that you wanted out and up until very recently, I’m just not sure how a person is supposed to react when they think everything is wonderful and their dream suddenly explodes into a pile of smoking debris.

First let me say that I’m very sorry for anything and everything I did or said in the past 23 years of knowing each other that brought pain or added suffering to your life.  I am far from perfect as you more than anyone else on this planet well knows.  I tried in my human imperfection to be the best wife to you that I could be, and I know that I failed in so many ways, miserably.  It is no secret that I’m an over achiever when it comes to failures.  But hopefully in that 90% you say was good about us and our marriage, you have some sweet, wonderful, and beautiful memories.  I certainly do!  I also hope that you are able to forgive me where I fell short.

You were a good husband in many ways.  You always worked very hard to keep a roof over our heads when you were able to work, often through intense pain physically.  No one can ever say you were less than a driven soul when it came to work, you always gave way more of yourself than you were compensated for, and it is commendable.

You were and are an outstanding dad, first to Michael who you loved like your own, and then to Liesl.  Both were very fortunate to have you there and I hope that they know this as much as I do.  I know you weren’t perfect, but you did excel far more than you know.

You were also my best friend, like you will never know.  You kept me safe, warm, and well taken care of over the years.  You tolerated my imperfections as best you could, I am well aware.  And you will never know and understand this, but the best thing you did for me was send me away.  At the time I didn’t see that, but now I see the good that has come and is coming from that.  No, not interested in reconciling, I never wish to be married to you again, I am not the one that will ever be able to bring joy and peace to your life, but someone out there will!

I am sorry that somehow I missed the attempts you made to tell me of my issues.  I am sorry that it took you leaving the marriage for me to see the damage I had done to your heart over the years.  I have those under control now and I’m a better person for the shocking reality I finally faced.  Nope, didn’t face it with the grace a class I aim for in life but then you know how hard-headed I can be at times.  :)  I also learned some hard lessons in this past year about my inability to drink without being an emotion charged stick of TNT.

You were right about so much that I am sorry now I didn’t give heed too.  A year of mourning and adjustments, and now renewed faith has brought much to light for me.  So this one last time I did feel the need to talk to/about you in my blog.

I wish you all the best, with all sincerity.  I hope you find  someone who can make you very happy, you deserve that.  And some day, for the sake of our kids and grandkids to be, I hope we can one day be friends again.  You were the center of my world, and I keep a special place in my heart for you.  I still pray for your safety when I hear the sirens.  You were a great friend, a good husband, a great dad and over all really a great man.

The past is done, water under the bridge, buried.  Here’s to the future and happiness!  Stay safe out there, Mike and Liesl still need their daddy!

With much fondness,

Marti