Tag Archive | Dating

#36 ~ 365 Reasons Being Single Rocks

Quality

#36

Your quality of life is your own to determine. As the quote below says, no one to lean on, rely on or blame.

I like that the most right now about being single, it is MY life.  All about ME.

I make no apologies to anyone anymore.

I no longer have to make excuses to anyone for who and what I am.

It is my life, and right now it is amazing as I discover who I am beneath all the layers of what others thought I should be.

And I am pretty darn special!

#30 ~ 365 Reasons Being Single Rocks!

TIME IS ON MY SIDE

#30

Time is the one thing of value that we cannot make more of, find more of, discover etc.

We’re given one life and a limited amount of time to live it.

Being single means I have more freedom with my time to do things I need or want to do.

Like building my business.

Juggling a relationship (2 since starting Avon) made it hard to devote enough time to keep the relationship and the business growing at the rate necessary.

The business is my money, my livelihood.  Getting it to where it can support me is critical.

I was married 2x, the first just 3 years, the second, 22 years.  I know what kind of time and commitment that takes.

I don’t have time for a friend with benefits let alone a relationship.

Being single….Time…it is all mine and on MY side right now.

~*~

#28 & #29 ~ 365 Reasons Being Single Rocks!

DRAMA!

#28

It happens, this thing called Drama.

For some of us simply waking up means there it is, waiting for our eyes to open.

Others…well they have to try harder I suppose.

Drama is going to happen in a relationship.

Be it with friends of his/hers, family, whatever or whoever, drama will occur.

Unless of course you are single.

No drama with his mama….

or sister, or niece, or whoever.

AHHH!

Holidays

#29

Holidays are stressful enough without trying to split them down the middle.

His parents want you at their house, her parents want you around their table.

No one wants to give, especially the couple, when it comes to traditions.

Our family always does….

Thankfully, when it is just you, there is no need to worry about where  you will spend a holiday or if it can be split in such a way as to make everyone (except the two of you) happy.

#27 ~ 365 Reasons Being Single Rocks!

Toilet Seat

#27

One nice thing about being single, male or female:

The toilet seat is always just as you left it!

Leave it up, it stays put.

Leave it down, and there it will be next time you use the bathroom.

Personally, I prefer to keep the lid closed, keeps cats from drinking from it and from knocking things IN to the commode.

#25 ~ 365 Reasons Being Single Rocks!

Tootsies!

#25

Seriously, when was the last time I painted my toes?

Hmmm…..before the camping trip I think, around Halloween.

See, I was dating The Count back then and so I kept the piggies all pretty.

Now that I am single?

Screw it, who cares?  Still a peek of red polish left on a few toes and I just don’t care!

#24 ~ 365 Reasons Being Single Rocks!

My Friends

#24

The person I am NOT dating, married to, involved with, LOVES all my friends!

The beauty of being single is that there is no one to say they don’t like your friends, or a particular friend.

The person you are NOT involved with never complains about any of them, knocks them, etc.!

Advice for the girls: Chicks before dicks!

Flip it if you are a guy, never let anyone come between you and your friends.

#19 ~ 365 Reasons Being Single Rocks!

Sleeping

#19

Okay this one isn’t quite mine.

I mean I had it on my list as sleeping anywhere you wish in the house.

Not on the couch because you are fighting and you were banished or decided to be a dolt (listen if you opt for the couch rather than the bed you are indeed a dolt).

But you fall asleep wherever and it is YOUR choice to sleep there.

The part not quite mine is what a local DJ on the radio posted on his Facebook this morning, that goes right along with this reason:

“The best part about living by myself is not having to explain why I fell asleep on the kitchen counter…naked…again.”

~ Jeff Thomas Q102  http://www.facebook.com/jeffthomasradio

Picture 'borrowed' from Daily Cognition, click photo to see other funny animal sleeping pics

#16 ~ 365 Reasons Being Single Rocks!

Colors

#16

Colors.  As in hair color.

For years I wanted to dye my hair just for the hell of it.

The ex-hubby was not in support.

He also didn’t care for it when I dyed just my bangs pink, said I’m too old for that.

Not against it either but you know that “look” you get from the significant others that says this isn’t one of your best ideas, so you don’t do it.

The ex-boyfriend was totally against it, he “fell in love with a blond”.

And by going red it made me a different  person?

Whatever.

Now, I am happy with my new color.

My daughter tells me she loves it and not to go back to blond.

Being single means I can sport any color of the rainbow without caring what anyone else thinks.

#15 ~ 365 Reasons Being Single Rocks!

Ink

#15

Ink..as in tattoos.

I happen to like tattoos.

Not ALL over me, but I have a few and want a few more.

They are significant to ME.

I dated a guy for 5 months that didn’t want me to get more, said “I don’t want your body littered with ink”.

Key word there, my former love, YOUR…

..as in MY body.

MY choice.

MY ink.

Being single means NO one tells me not to get another tattoo.

*Note: yes those are my legs from a photo shoot I did in an abandoned theater*

#14 ~ 365 Reasons Being Single Rocks!

Career

#14

Working or your career – NO one to complain that you are working too much.

For me, I’m busy building a business at the moment, and it can take a lot of my time.

Since it is 1 of 2 jobs I have, and the one that I plan to make HUGE and the big bucks, I have little time for a relationship.

No one can complain if there is no significant other!

I Am NOT Alone

There is a grave  misconception that if you are single, you are alone.  That poor, lonely woman/man, all alone in the world.

Excuse me?  I am far from alone or lonely.

If I wanted to reactivate my dating profiles on all the dating sites, I’d have no end to the dates.  No kidding, I had dated 13 men thanks to those sites, in a very short period of time.  The Count being number 13, evidentially he is NOT my lucky number guy. OR maybe he was, he showed me I was still caught in the cycle of being a pleaser and that had to stop.  No more  bending me to mold to someone elses specifications.  I could start that whole saga again, many of those men would still love to be on my dance card.  I know this due to the sudden influx of communication when I changed my status in life back to single.

I have a multitude of friends, both men and women.  At any time I can find a male friend to go have a beer, a sporting event or something a bit more intimate.  I have girlfriends I can call to go hit a movie, dinner or a cemetery tour (don’t judge, it was by full moon and very cool).  My kids love to do many of these and other things.  My Divas, yes we all love this and more.   I have plenty of people in my life to fill any need I have on a friendship or social level.  If I stay home and do nothing, it is my choice!

Single does not mean lonely or alone.  Single = FREEDOM!  INDEPENDENCE!!

Other than my work responsibilities, I can come and go as I please!  I see who I want, when I want, do what I want when I want to do it!

Lonely? Hardly.

Alone? Really? Nope not at all.

If I want to sleep next to someone, that can be easily arranged too. Yes, I have friends I can call if I want to spend the night in the arms of someone special.  Believe me they need to be special to make that list.

My point is:  being single doesn’t mean I am lonely.  It simply means I am not committed to anyone….but me!

In the new year I plan to write 365 reasons that being single ROCKS.  I know that is a huge undertaking but I think I can do it!  Every day I will find some reason why being INDEPENDENT is awesome!

Shelving 2011 ~ Box 29

I follow The Single Woman and that is where I was inspired to come up with this year ending purging from my life. The first post (Life’s Changing Landscape: Shelving 2011) covers the how/why, the rest will be the 31 things I am shelving from 2011 that will not go with me into the new year, the full list of posts pertaining to what I’m purging can be found here: Shelving 2011.

Box 29

This box is related to my post yesterday, about embracing ME in 2012, it is dating.  I’m putting dating in the box and putting it on the shelf for the coming year.  I think my biggest problem was jumping into the dating scene too soon after the marriage had ended.  I need time to finish unwrapping me without reapplying layers to suit others that I am seeing.  Only one of the 3 men I got into a relationship with this past year didn’t try to change me, and that was the Superhero.  He just wanted to know ME and didn’t ask me to change anything about myself.  Sadly it didn’t work because I didn’t want him to change either.  Mr. Wonderful wanted me to layer over things, not mention them, etc from my past.  And the Count…well obviously he wanted me to layer over things too, and that simply will not work.  Again. Ever.

I’ve decided that I need more time to discover  me.  I know that I have some unresolved issues and hurts from the marriage.  I found an awesome divorce support group called DivorceCare.  Bible based and full of support, I am going to look into it.  It runs about 13 weeks and many of the churches in this area have started DivorceCare groups.  My best friend from childhood told me what a wonder it did for her, not to mention she met her soon to be husband in this group, remained friends long after the sessions ended, and now they are in love and going to get married.  I don’t want to join to find anyone, I’m not looking.  I want to join to clear up any last fragments of pain and move forward.  No doubt it will help in my faith too.

SO, while I will enjoy the company of male friends now and then, they have to understand I am not seeking a relationship right now with anyone but ME.  No dating, I pay my own way or I don’t go.  Simple as that.  I will gladly spend time with friends, but I am not seeking a mate.  I’m seeking the person that matters most in my life, ME.

2012 – The Year Of Embracing ME!

I am SINGLE.

I love ME.

I do not need a relationship.

I am not looking for a relationship.

In fact, I’m looking to avoid a relationship at this point.

2012 – my year of JOY.  And part of that joy is going to be in being single.

One thing I learned after my divorce in 2010, I had lost me in the 22 years of being married.  We ALL do this in relationships.  HOSSO (he or she significant other) doesn’t like our nails with color on, so we get those nails done in a French manicure all of the time.  Those cute little airbrushed designs on the nails? Nope.  Tattoos, what you have is what you get, HOSSO doesn’t want you to get anymore, or maybe doesn’t care for your choice of designs so you don’t get the desired ink.  Feel there are situations where using the word FUCK is appropriate (outside of the bedroom)? HOSSO doesn’t like that word so you just don’t use it.

These are minor things really but over time we all make changes, burying parts of ourselves to please our HOSSO.  I looked in the mirror at the end of the marriage, after moving out, and realized the person looking back at me was a complete stranger.  Oh she looked familiar, but I didn’t really know her anymore.  I had buried so much of myself that I was a screwed up mix of a person that looked like I had melted in the kiln, I wasn’t recognizable any  longer.  Heck maybe that is why the marriage didn’t work out after 22 years, I kept trying to adapt to my HOSSO’s specifications instead of standing up and being ME from day one.

In peeling back those layers to find the real me underneath, I’ve learned a LOT.  Baggage is not a bad thing.  We all have baggage we drag through life.  You know what? I opened mine up and took a long hard look.  I even went as far as to pull out some of the items and put them back ON.  See, every experience in life is in those suitcases we pull along with us. It is who we are and it is not a bad thing to have baggage.  If we dumped it all, then all that is left is the empty shell of the vessel that is us.  The canvas would be white and blank and BORING!  I don’t want to be dull, I want to be ME.  And ME is in all of that baggage.

I’ve decided that in order to really free myself from any remaining layers piled on me, I need to take a year to just enjoy being Marti.  Marvelous, wacky, destined for old maid/crazy cat lady status, MARTI.  For 2012 I do not want a relationship.  I want to enjoy being just me. Not Marti & ______ (fill in the blank with whatever male counter part name).  I want to embrace being the odd woman out, the 5th wheel.  I have plenty of male friends I can go hang with for a football game, a beer, dinner or whatever.  But I do NOT want to date anyone, I don’t want to be known as anyone’s woman, girlfriend, or significant other.  Being single is my CHOICE.  I can have a relationship, long term if I so chose.  But my choice for now is to just be single, sassy, marvelous ME!

I’m going to start a new category and page on my blog, Sassy & Solo – reasons why being single ROCKS.

The Marvelously Sassy One! yes that will be my new, crazy cat lady name.  :)

Shame On The Other Woman?

*Photo credit - click photo to go to it's origin*

*Walks in, puts soap box down, jumps up on it*

I’m reaching the end of my tolerance for people trashing “the other woman” when a man is found cheating.  In fact my dear sisters that want to bad mouth these women, you need to have some sense knocked into you.  Quit slamming our fellow females and put the blame squarely where it belongs, on the cheating man!  It is time for the ones doing the betraying to be held responsible and not the person they were getting it on with.

I will use my own experience as an example.  I started seeing someone that I was very attracted too.  It wasn’t just a physical thing, we connected on many levels.  We went out, and yes we had a physical, intimate relationship as well, right off the bat (come on folks, we’re adults, this is 2011, sex happens and happens right away so get over acting like  you are shocked when it does).  I asked him if he was single, and was told he was divorced and not involved with anyone.  I believed him, what reason would I not? And, as I was single, I didn’t have a commitment to be concerned about.   All I had to go on was his word and I trusted him.  As it turned out…he was in fact very married.  Now, who is to blame here? Not me, I’m not the one that was in a committed relationship and failed to share that rather important piece of information.  I got MY heart broken because I was being lied too just as much as his wife was being deceived.  The responsible party here is the man who was married and cheating on his wife! I didn’t make the commitment, it is not my responsibility to keep that commitment to her…it is HIS!

Look, I get it, I’ve been cheated on in my lifetime a few times.  It hurts and we want to blame someone, so we lash out at the other woman (or if we are guys we go kick some dude’s ass).  Suddenly the other woman, the innocent-and-unattached-didn’t-make-a-commitment one is called a home wrecker, whore or worse.  Never mind that she was never informed that said cheating dirt bag was married or otherwise attached, we want to blame the person that isn’t in the now shattered bond of trust.  We let our sisters take the blame and responsibility for something the man did.  If he tells me he is single and I go sheet dancing with him and later it is found out he is sort of or very much attached, that is HIS DAMN FAULT.  He needs to take ownership of his screw up and we need to put the blame ON HIM!

As women we get all worked up, what does she have that I don’t have? We start picking apart the other female when the person that needs to be picked apart is the cheater, not the woman he cheated with.  We love our men so we don’t want to rip them up too much, so we blame the woman, she must be a whore or a slut.  Um…NO LADIES! She is a victim in this situation too!  She was lied too, and in a sense cheated on by the dishonest man who KNEW he made a commitment and chose NOT to honor it.  Remember, her time is invested in him, so is her heart.  He deceived her and you!  I don’t care how pretty, sexy, or tempting that lady is, I don’t care what you think she did to lure your man away…HE made the decision to jump in the sheets with her. HE was in the committed relationship, HE is the one that made a promise, and HE is the one that broke it.  Not the other woman.  It is NOT her fault.  AND if by chance she did know he was attached, as I know there are women that love going after married guys, it doesn’t matter if she DID do all she could to lure him to her bed.  If he goes, it’s HIS FAULT not hers.  HE broke the commitment, HE cheated, HE made the decision to go for it rather than walk away.

How about we start blaming the one who cheated, and leave the one they cheated on us with out of the picture.  No one held a gun to his head ladies, no one forced him.  He made a conscious decision to leave your bed and go to hers.  Which SHOULD tell you something about where you stand with him.  Don’t be upset that you were lied too, be upset that you were not worth the truth!  And put the blame on the right party.

*gets  down off my soap box*

Things I Can't Say

*DISCLAIMER – I know, women cheat on husbands/boyfriends too, but lately I’ve seen several ‘other women’ trashed when the cheater should be to blame*

The Dating Diaries ~ My Fantasy Dating Profile

I follow a guy on Twitter and through his blogs, Dad Unmasked, who is a divorced dad raising 2 girls.  I love what he writes about in both venues.  As someone that has done the dating site game, I totally enjoyed his Fantasy Dating Profile post.  It inspired me to write one of my own.

The whole idea is that the profile I write is REAL, the real me!  The fantasy in this case being that someone out there wants the REAL people, not the Barbie dolls.  I cannot tell you the number of profiles I had read of guys who are overweight, unemployed or living like it (hey can only go on your pictures of the trashed trailer you appear to be sitting in with dirty dishes stacked high and trash bags piled around) that are dog ugly and specify that the female needs to be trim, in shape, and gorgeous.  Really?  So see, the fantasy is that someone would really want the real me!  And so far that guy I seek must be a fantasy too, as I’m just looking for a REAL guy. But that is for the post I will title “Mr. Right’s Fantasy Dating Profile” to be posted in the near future.

SO, here is my fantasy dating profile:

My Self Summary:  I’m a 48 year old, divorced mother of two.  My children are both adults, they do not live with me but are known to make unscheduled, unannounced visits and this is a good thing.  I’m 5’6″ tall, curvy with a few extra pounds.  Yes a FEW.  NO I am not fat, obese, etc.  When I say few I mean it, I am nothing if not brutally honest.  I have big boobs, a plus to some men and a minus to others. I have hips and a booty and I’m not upset about it.  I’m very happy with myself as I am.  I’m not your sugar mama, I don’t make a lot of money.  But I’m very happy with what I make and comfortable.  I am not a clean freak but I’m not a hoarder.  If it hasn’t been used or worn in 6 months I dispose of it to charity or the trash.  I don’t like clutter and I won’t live with it either.

I’m really good at:  Cleaning, taking care of little ones, and sales.  I was a very good office manager too, but I’ve made a serious career change into daycare and sales and have no intentions of returning to managing anyone’s office but my own.  I can cook but don’t like too so my talents are limited.  But I’ve yet to go hungry.  I’m good at cheering for my favorite football teams and yes I do like watching it either in the stadium, a sports bar, or my own living room with friends.  I can dress up and look like a million but frankly much prefer a tailgate, fire pit, a hoodie and some beer with friends.

The first thing people notice about me:  My eyes.  If I had a dollar for every time someone complimented my eyes I’d be rich.

Favorites:

Food: Chipotle steak bowls, with rice, black beans, corn salsa and cheese…no sour cream. EVER.

Movies: too many to name but they are not all chick flicks.

Music: that varies with my mood or the mood I wish to set.  Country, classical, hip-hop, classic rock, easy listening, soft rock…

Books:  first and foremost my bible. Then a variety of things, romance, historical fiction, biographies, autobiographies, motivational, business…I love to read.

TV Shows:  Blue Bloods, CSI, CSI:NY, NCIS and Criminal Minds.

I’m seeking: A man who is honest, I cannot and will not tolerate lies.  Someone who is affectionate, who isn’t looking for a Barbie Doll, is loyal/faithful (sorry don’t share), works hard but doesn’t let work come before his family, someone seeking a best friend in their mate and not a trophy.

Sadly this isn’t what most are seeking I am thinking.  But I’m working on a post all about the real me.  I did one for my 100th post long ago, but thinking it is time to really open up. That is a post coming too.

BEEP – Time’s Up!

Fellas, don’t suddenly decide to remember her the very moment she finally forgets you. Let her go & let her be. ~ TheSingleWoman™

It has been a week since things fell apart with The Count.  I’m sitting here at my computer analyzing it one last time.  Last time because I figure a week has gone by now and if in 7 days he didn’t see fit to find time to contact me and iron this out, then perhaps I am the one that needs to rethink the relationship.  True love would not let something so ridiculous as a Facebook post that may be seen by a 12yo end a relationship (sorry 99% of those on my Facebook are adults and the post had to do with politics, the Occupy weirdos and as it happened they were topless women).  Looking back it may not have been one of my brighter shinning moments when it comes to posting stuff, but gee, really?  So I’ve been rethinking everything and going back over the pros and cons of the Count & Me, and analyzing it all.

I need more than a few texts and one day a week to build a relationship.  We aren’t talking a “friends with benefits” thing here.  This was us, planning a future, talking about a future business, where we’d live, like as in LONG TERM and permanent.  Him being busy I understand, but not so busy that the person you claim to love doesn’t take more priority in your life.  I’m not unreasonable and really not all that demanding.  I saw much more of the ex husband when we were dating (several nights a week and weekends) and he lived 2 hours away!  In the beginning, with the Count, in the first few weeks, we did see each other a bit more, but then his job got in the way.  SO…is a phone call on the way home from work that taxing? Or one night during the week finding time, like in the beginning of the relationship, to have dinner on that night he wasn’t working?

Meanwhile of the 12 other men I dated off the dating sites, several would have been happy to continue to date, see me far more often and 3 of them would have carted me off to Vegas and got married after the first date.  I wouldn’t have done that, my mother didn’t raise a fool, but it would be very nice to have fallen in love with someone that put me just a little bit higher up the priority list, where I did not feel like an after thought.   And if you cannot spend more than a day a week with me, then don’t ask me not to date other people.  If you don’t have time for a relationship, why in the world were you on a dating site to begin with? Why start something that you know full well you cannot give the time too that it deserves?  Why would you get involved and let someone fall in love with you, fall in love with them (or so you say), knowing that you cannot (frankly in this case more like will not) devote the time to them that is needed to grow things?

The statute of limitations for over hauling and putting this relationship back on the rails has run out.

*Note To Self:  never again, as the saying goes, make someone in my life a priority that only makes me an option.*

The Dating Diaries ~ If You Can’t Handle Me At My Worst…

TheSingleWoman™ – As uncertain as the life of a single girl might be..we make our own rules & answer only to ourselves..& that ROCKS.

The door to the secret garden of my heart is slammed shut and locked.  Yeah, all is not good in paradise today.  And if you know anything about me you know that if you hurt my feelings bad enough, I’m going to completely close up and good luck getting me to open up again.  My heart is a very fragile thing, has been for a few years now and for me to open it to anyone is a huge step for me.  And for anyone to find themselves in possession of a key to the gate of my secret garden, the deep parts of me, the whole of my heart and soul, well use it responsibly because while I do not pick who has that key, fate/chemistry/God does, I do chose who will suddenly find their key no longer works in the lock.

I’m trying very hard not to be irrational, stomping pacing back and forth in front of the gate on the inside of the wall, the temptation to revoke access is definitely there.  Once I revoke it, it is never available again, which is why this Taurian is snorting and stomping fuming and pacing.  I’ve worked hard the past two years, with the help of the meds, to learn to control my reactions and instead of reacting, chose to  respond.

As I have said in my About Me section, I am known for posting things now and then that may be considered inappropriate, or not thinking through things before I hit post/publish.  This is not just on my blog, it goes on Facebook too.  Seems I did that…well okay after further review of the play, the penalty call stands.  I cannot reverse it no matter how many red flags I toss out there on the field.

The post was a video of some of the occupy Wall Street ladies topless, whining and carrying on about the cops telling them to put their shirts back on.  I found it hard to take these idiots seriously when I saw it, so much for being intelligent liberals, obviously you had to resort to displaying your less than impressive rack to gain attention to your cause as no one was paying attention.  And they sure weren’t going to take you seriously now!  But back on track here (love when I hijack my own blog).  I posted that, not thinking about the fact that the Count’s 12yo grandson would see it.  Seems the Count didn’t care for it either.  I thought I had set it so the  children/youngsters on my Facebook didn’t see it, but guess that was an epic FAIL.  I had commented on a photo of a cheerleader with a spot on the crotch of her shorts too, that I thought it was photo shopped.  Because I commented on it, the way Facebook works these days, it showed up in the feeds of my friends.  I didn’t think about that, I’m still adjusting to the changes Facebook made (when will they learn if it isn’t broken don’t fix it?).

Now backing up a tad here, things have been strained between me and the count of late, at least it felt that way.  I knew going into this that this time of year he works, A LOT.  As in he is at work before most of us get out of bed in the morning, and is still working when most of us go to bed at night.  And we’re seeing each other one day a week if that.  But as I said, this I knew so while I am a woman that needs more attention than a random text every day, I was being patient and trying not to complain.  Though I admit I felt like the family pooch given the crumbs brushed off the table after everyone else had their portion of the count’s time.  It’s what you do when you love someone.  And is wasn’t going to last forever, just a few more weeks before things would be normal again.

So, Friday at 9pm I received a text, him venting about work.  I sent multiple texts after that.  Nothing, no response at all.  I had dinner with a very dear friend last night and came home to discover I had been deleted from the Count’s Facebook, and his grandson’s.  No text, email or phone call to explain, just gone.  I texted and got no reply. I called and left a voicemail, nothing.  Now maybe I am not thinking this through clearly (damn muscle relaxers) but when one goes from dozens of texts a day, slowly down to a random ONE most days…it is hard to hold on with that crumb.  Then to go over 24 hours with no communication and to find oneself removed from their significant other’s friends list and their grandson’s.  Well I’m sorry if I jumped to the wrong conclusion after the attempts to communicate from my end, but I assumed the relationship had come to a halt.  Please feel free to point out to me if you think this was not a valid conclusion.

I come to find out, finally after making that assumption in a text in the wee hours of this morning when I couldn’t sleep and asking yet again later at a reasonable hour of the morning when I still had no reply, that he removed me and made the grandson remove me, over that video and the picture.  And now he needs to take a step back and rethink us?

All this could have been avoided with a quick text pointing out the necessary reminder (told ya I don’t think things through all the time) that there is a child on my Facebook and that the items were inappropriate viewing material.  But no, he reacted in anger (he said he was mad over it) and deleted me.

Now, I might be wrong here as I’m stomping through my vegetation tip toeing through the tulips inside the garden here, but when you go from “I love you” and “I miss you” and talking about a future, a business, and a life together, to all of the above….well to ME it sure seems like someone was just looking for an easy way out?  How about just telling me you want out, it isn’t working for you, whatever.  If anyone thinks it hurts less this way well they are quite mistaken.

The  worst part is I find myself repeating dance steps of the past…making excuses for him!  He is working so hard, long hours, is sleep deprived and grumpy and on a short fuse these days….when in fact there is no excuse for treating someone you say you love this way!  Communication is key to any relationship and there was a huge lack of it here.  And I cannot do this again, I’m not going to be an option rather than a priority in anyone’s life.  And I am sure as hell not going to change who and what I am to fit in anyone’s mold.  Been there, done that, and spent a long time  peeling back the layers and rediscovering who I really was and I am NOT going back in a box for anyone.  Take me as I am or don’t take me at all!

In the words of my all time favorite quote and personal mantra:

“I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.”~ Marilyn Monroe

And  honestly, if that is the worst anyone ever has to deal with, my imperfection when it comes to posting stuff now and then that maybe I need to think through, but my best is loyalty, love and total faithfulness and support, then  they should seriously be thankful because I’m one hell of a great package!  If he cannot handle my worst…well as it says, he doesn’t deserve my best.

Which must be evident  to many because the single men are already swarming  like cockroaches when the lights go out, asking for a chance to see if they might hold that key to the garden gate after seeing my relationship status change to single when someone deleted me.

Sorry boys, the marvelous one needs time to let the cracks in her heart heal right now.  :(

Meet Me On Monday

Welcome to the 57th edition of “Meet Me On Monday!” 

Blogging  is a funny thing…we tell our most intimate thoughts for all to read  and yet most of the time I find myself sitting and wondering, “who is  this person!?”  I know them…but yet I don’t know them!  I want  to know who the person is behind all those words so I thought of a great  way for all of us to “meet” each other!

Every Sunday Never Growing Old will post five get to know you  questions that you can copy and paste into your own Monday post and we  can all learn a little more about each and every one of us!!

Java will add a linky so we can follow who participates and get to know them  better!!  Be sure to link the POST and not just your whole blog!!

Questions:

1.  Does your family/friends know about your blog?
2.  What is your favorite card game?
3.  What do you wear to bed? 
4.  What is your favorite kind of French Fry?
5.  What is your usual bed time?
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My Answers!

1.  Does your family/friends know about your blog?

Yes, my family, friends,  the ex-husband, the kids, guys I dated off the online dating sites (some of them even subscribe to it!) and yes, Steve knows and to my knowledge doesn’t read it but supports me, probably the only people that really don’t know about my blog is the current neighbors.   I have an open door policy for my blog.  Though I admit, parts are password protected, and I DO post on a site  where I can let it all loose when I just need to vent without hurting feelings.

2.  What is your favorite card game?

That  would be Rook (aka Baptist Bridge).  I really am not much of a card player but I really like Rook…I GET IT  so it is a good game!

3.  What do you wear to bed?

Well…jammies until I am IN the bed.  Then partial jammies.  No bottoms as nothing bugs the crap out of me more than getting tangled in my jammies so I remove those.  They are close by lest the house catch fire and I have to hang my big white butt  out of the window naked.  NOT good fodder for the community press or the 11pm news.

4.  What is your favorite kind of French Fry?

Regular old fries….used to be McDonald’s but they got all healthy and ruined the flavor.  Now, I suppose White Castle is good, Burger King….just fries, ya know?  For the most part I haven’t met a french fry I didn’t like.

5.  What is your usual bed time?

Well I aim for 10pm but lucky to get there at 11pm most nights.  Once in a while  I am just too tired and go earlier but that is  rare.  11pm ish  so to speak would be my regular bed time.