Category Archives: Random

Baby Steps

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428502_409581465815733_728306446_nI’ve been super confused of late about relationships, dating, and what my heart can take/not take.  Last Saturday I spent the entire day with Teddy Bear, talking very openly about our lives, our experiences, and taking turns asking probing questions that sparked all manner of great conversations and memories.  Later, after a fun day of driving the countryside of Indiana, through an adorable small town, lunch and dinner at new places for me, and touring an art museum (where I discovered I’ve really grown up as I LOVED it), I was laying in bed contemplating some of the conversations.

All day long my inner child and my heart took turns peeking around the barriers while trying to stay hidden.  But maybe not all that hidden?  I was told that despite thinking I have my heart locked up tight where it cannot be broken, that it shines through in my eyes and smile.  I began wondering if maybe I am just over thinking things and need to just let it out to wander again.  After all, with love comes heart ache, they seem to go hand in hand.  I see it as a mom when I dearly love my kids but my heart suffers with theirs when they are hurting.  You cannot love without pain being involved at times.

So I started to think just maybe it is time to remove the barriers and let my heart out completely.  Stop hiding behind the heartaches that have healed long ago and explore the possibility of finding potential forever love again.  It means I have to take chances, risk getting hurt in order to find love.

I’ve reached the conclusion that one day, my heart can and will find someone that I can love completely, like I did the ex.  But I have to be open to exploring those potential loves.

It is with baby steps that I’m shedding the walls and unlocking the gate to my heart’s garden.  Time to see where my heart takes me.

 

Sipping Water From A Wine Glass & Playing With Pou

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MyTiaraWineGlassI am fast realizing it is the presence of the wine glass that I enjoy at night, and not so much the contents.  I am sipping white grape flavored water from mine, and well it is still soothing.  And at zero calories, compared to wine at 80 per 4 ounces (as IF that were truly a glass of wine), this will suffice for the time being.

A few days ago my sister-in-law was over with her fancy water bottle.  75 ounces with a freezer thingie for sticking in it to keep it cold all day.  I had to have one, as that would be the day’s water consumption and I know I would not lose count.  Pink of course, and it is AWESOME!  Had it with me all day and by the end of dinner I had consumed every drop.  I am still under my minimum calories by 3, but I think I can live with that.

Pou?  Oh yes, that would be a cute little app for my phone and Kindle Fire.  It is supposedly and alien, but resembles a little pile of poop.  Like the Tamagotchi my kids had many moons ago, I have to feed, clean up it’s poop, play with it etc.  I know, what the heck was I thinking?  Then I come to find out my granddaughter has one on her tablet.  Immediate ‘hip granny’ points were scored.  It isn’t like there isn’t enough ridiculous crap that I do, FarmVille2, Candy Crush Saga (if you don’t already play that do NOT start, it is highly addicting and frustrating), umpteen social networking apps, a blog, a full time job AND a part time business. Yeah, I have spare time for this, right?  My family and friends are baffled that I’m playing with ‘poop’, but it isn’t, it is Pou.

Tomorrow’s post is the Friday Confessional, and oh do I have some confessions to make.  Brace yourself you are going to think I’ve lost my mind completely.  Okay, not funny, I have NOT lost it, at least not entirely, yet anyway.  It may wait until Saturday morning, as tomorrow begins the 1 week count down to my 50th birthday the following Friday and I have a short day at work before heading out with a friend and my kids and their significant others to kick it off with a 1 hour train ride to an Irish pub for dinner, then a 1 hour train trip back.  I have trains in my blood, gramps was a railroad engineer for a LONG time from back when it was coal ran steam engines.  Pass a train crossing and I might just get out and stand there to feel the rumble as all of the sheer power goes by.  Yet I have never been on a train.  Okay I rode the one at the zoo, but I mean a REAL train.  I cannot wait, this is going to be great fun.  Anytime with my kids is fun.

Good grief my head itches! TMI?  Sorry.  I am bleaching my roots and it is making my scalp itch.  I’m a real sight sitting here in a shredded t-shirt, jammie pants, my water in the wine glass and blue goop on my head.  And NO there will be no photo.

Speaking of wine glasses, that photo, if you click it, will take you to the site where you can purchase one.  Next time I have $24 I am dying to part with on something I do NOT need, that will be where it is spent!  I simply must have that one.

Stand By Hobby Lobby & Get Your Blanket Made Free!

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185715_10151329132024824_641490212_nI usually stay far from politics on my blog, but I’m really yanked today.

I am all over religious freedom, and frankly I am really ticked off over Hobby Lobby, a Christian company, being forced to go against their beliefs with the ObamaCare mandates.

Here is the story:

On Saturday, January 5th, all Americans who value freedom of religion and oppose the HHS Mandate’s unfair impositions upon religious individuals and corporate entities are called upon to show their support for Hobby Lobby by shopping either at their local retail Hobby Lobby store or online.

PLEASE SHARE THIS EVENT WIDELY!

The story until now:
• September 12, 2012: Hobby Lobby files suit against Kathleen Sabelius and the US Department of Health and Human Services in US District Court for Western District of Oklahoma. They are represented by the Becket Fund for Religious Liberty.
• November 19, 2012: District Judge Joe Heaton rules that privately owned companies such as Hobby Lobby are not exempt from the HHS Mandate on religious grounds because these enterprises do not possess the same religious rights as individuals and religious organizations do.
• December 20, 2012: The US Court of Appeals in Denver rules against Hobby Lobby on the same grounds as the lower court; the Green family vows to appeal to the US Supreme Court.
• December 26, 2012: Justice Sonia Sotomayor rejects an emergency request for injunction that would allow Hobby Lobby temporary exemption from the HHS Mandate pending the hearing of their full case before the high court.
• December 27, 2012: Hobby Lobby’s attorneys announce that the chain plans to defy the Mandate which will take effect January 1st, potentially costing the chain (which employs 13,000) hundreds of millions of dollars in fines by the time their case is finally decided.

SO, stand with me in support of Hobby Lobby:

To show support today for Hobby Lobby, go buy something. Better yet, I am going to make blankets for FREE (YOU buy the yarn, my labor in making it and returning it is free) for anyone who goes and buys the yarn (either in person or on line at the Hobby Lobby website).  You must purchase 3 coordinating colors of the  “I Love This Yarn” brand (their brand) yarn.  Blanket measures approximately 45″x61″.  Attached is a photo of what it will look like. I will list the amounts and you can substitute colors keeping in mind that white is also the boarder of the blanket.

white – 21 ounces/1380 yards
black – 15.5 ounces/1020 yards
grey – 14.5 ounces/955 yards

You buy it and ship it to me (contact me for my address) and I will make the blanket and return it to you.  It has to be Hobby Lobby’s yarn, purchased from them.  For the record I would normally charge $75, in addition to the price of the yarn, to make this blanket.

Show support and buy the yarn and I’ll make the blanket for FREE, all you have to do is supply the yarn purchased from Hobby Lobby. Contact me for shipping address and let’s stand by Hobby Lobby!!!

Offer valid TODAY ONLY!!  Contact me today via my email:   marvimarti@gmail.com, to reserve your blanket, then go purchase the yarn to show support.

NOTE: Blankets take approximately one week to make and will be made in the order requests/reservations are received.

ONLY OPEN TO  UNITED STATES READERS/ADDRESSES!

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It’s A Cold Beer Kind Of A Night

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It is dreary and raining and getting cold outside.  We had thunderstorms this afternoon.  Yes, here in an area where white Christmas does happen, we had thunderstorms today.  Frankly I am not a fan of snow but I’m all over it on Christmas morning, bring it.  But keep the thunderstorms, too out of context in December.

I apologize for my absence this past week, especially to those followers who have gotten used to daily posts from my corner of the world.  Last Monday I went back to school to get my STNA certification (State Tested Nurse Aide).  In class all day, homework and study at night, tests the next morning.  Such has been my life since.  Over the weekend I took a break and spent Friday night watching my granddaughter and I slept in on Saturday and Sunday morning.  I know I know, I should have been in church Sunday but I was beyond exhausted.  I’m pretty certain the Lord understands I was fried and needed the rest.

If I had taken the class at Cincinnati State it is like an 8 week course.  I’m not sure why, as it is 75 hours of training that includes 2 days of clinical, so 8 weeks seems a bit excessive.  But I will say 2 weeks really crams the material in fast.

I’ve never had some dream of doing this, in fact I have never really had any desire to be involved in the medical field in any capacity.  28 years of administrative and office management most of which was in an IT department, then 2 years of childcare and Avon, but never anything like this.  I was drawn to it when I visited the nursing home my sister works in, and when I talked about volunteering there she told me to go get certified and get paid to do the work.  Especially as volunteers cannot do the things I will be able to do to care for the residents.  And the more I learn the more I am drawn to this career.  I’m already looking at several other certifications that would expand the role I can play in caring for the elderly.

So that is where I have been.  I miss writing as it is my therapy, and miss all the memes and hops, but I will be back to those soon.  Friday is the final exam and I’ll be back here Friday afternoon for the Friday Confessional.

381998_391024604316403_639913031_nMeanwhile, I’m having a blast in school.  I LOVE to learn new things, and I’m in a class of only 5 students and we have a great chemistry.  Last week at lunch we took Scary Mary, the mannequin we practice on, and had some fun with her.  She is scary because well she just looks freaky.  And her boobs come off, so you can put man boobs on her and a penis.  Her eyes are creepy and more than one of us has walked through the door into the practice/skill room toward the restroom and jumped because there she is in the bed being all low budget horror movie like.  I’m probably scarred for life and will have nightmares about her.  The photo is Scary Mary at the instructor’s desk.  She has also been on the toilet, and I hope it scared the crap out of a weekend student.  Cruel, I know, but I’m all about sharing the love in this case.

Anyway, so here I am now, waiting on the dryer to finish up, sipping a cold beer, on a cold, rainy night, longing to crawl in to my bed.  I have to be up before the angels in the morning to head to my first day of clinical at the nursing home.  I’ll be catching up on my grown up Christmas list posts over the weekend too.  But for now, I think I’ll play on Farmville2 until the dryer is done, then it is off to bed for me.

Doc In The Box

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docWell okay, not a doctor, a nurse practitioner.

And not in a box.  In our grocery store.

The Little Clinic.

I have to say…I am impressed.

I’ve been sick off and on now for oh…maybe 2 months?  Mostly I figured it was allergies, and it was, however it grew.  It became a sinus infection.  I did what every good Diva does, I self medicated with antibiotics I found left over from others in the house.  I know, I know, not good, especially when they were expired.  Weaker versions of their original selves.  Oh I checked to be sure they were ones for treating sinus infections, and they were, but they were weak at best.  It helped a little. But then things just got worse.  Even my eyes are watery and itchy from the, well, yuck stuff in my head.  Not good.

So, now that I’ve lost my voice, I finally went to have it checked.  Okay, again, mom said she was dragging me there strongly suggesting I go.  As I am self pay because I do not have insurance, I opted for the newly opened  Little Clinic.  For what it would cost me at the doc’s office, but without an appointment and much more convenient hours (guess THEY understand people work or have other obligations and their illnesses don’t seem to receive the memos about 9-5 except when on the golf course.

The place was not busy, was seen right away, and now I have a nice, strong, new antibiotic and a steroid to take to get me going.  Not  contagious just nothing more than a whisper and my head is stuffed and it’s dripping its yuck down my throat.  Lovely visual I know.  I’m a vision of loveliness actually, sporting my Bengal jersey (and of course they lost) and sniffling, blowing, sneezing.

And now, all medicated up and with a hot cup of hazelnut cappuccino (thanks to my niece moving home with her Keurig) I’m curling up on the bed to work on a crochet project and enjoy my virtual, HD fireplace on my TV (no fireplace in my bedroom) along with some nice Christmas music.

I Wish You Enough

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I WISH YOU ENOUGH

Recently, I overheard a mother and daughter in their last moments together at the airport as the daughter’s departure had been announced. Standing near the security gate, they hugged and the mother said:
“I love you and I wish you enough.”

The daughter replied, “Mom, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Mom.” They kissed and the daughter left.

The mother walked over to the window where I sat. Standing there, I could see she wanted and needed to cry.

I tried not to intrude on her privacy but she welcomed me in by asking, “Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?” “Yes, I have,” I replied. “Forgive me for asking but why is this a forever good-bye?”

“I am old and she lives so far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is the next trip back will be for my funeral,” she said.

When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, “I wish you enough.” May I ask what that means?”

She began to smile. “That’s a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone.” She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail and she smiled even more.

“When we said ‘I wish you enough’ we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them”. Then turning toward me, she shared the following, reciting it from memory,

“I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.

I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.

I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.

I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.

I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.

I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.

I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.“

She then began to cry and walked away.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person. An hour to appreciate them. A day to love them. And an entire life to forget them.

- Author Unknown

Merry, Happy, Reasons For the Season

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Every year at this time the Facebook statuses, tweets, photos, signs etc start appearing.  ”Keep Christ In Christmas” they say.  People get all freaked out because certain stores no longer allow employees to say “Merry Christmas”, but instead they say, “Happy Holidays”.  So what?

For years I felt that this was important too, the whole “reason for the season” concept.  After all, being raised Catholic and now a Reformed Baptist in my theology, Jesus is a big part of who I am.

And then I did my research.  It was in an effort to back up the whole “reason for the season” argument.

Seems that there were winter and pagan holiday celebrations long before Christianity infused Christ into the equation.   In fact, the church used the birth of Jesus as a way to counter those celebrations and convert pagans to their faith.  It wasn’t until a few hundred years after Jesus was crucified that the church began to celebrate His birth.  The Bible no where indicates that we are to even commemorate His birth.  The only remembrance of the Lord that we are instructed to ‘celebrate’ is His death and resurrection.  Given the detailed instructions for that, and the lack of any mention of remembering His birth, I think it safe to say that Jesus is not the reason for the season.  In fact, He was added to the season by men.

Now for my readers of faith, I am a born again believer.  And yes I do celebrate Christmas.  I do take part in church celebrations of the birth of Christ.  But I also celebrate the whole Santa Claus, Christmas trees, gift giving etc. side of this time of the year.  Our zoo decorates with over 2 million lights, and beginning tomorrow evening is the official opening of their “Festival Of Lights”.  What is amusing is that the Festival Of Lights is another name for the Jewish holiday of Hanukkah.  But countless people of faith will flock to the zoo and  walk amid the lights and decorated trees, some decked out for Christmas, without even realizing that this is not a Christian celebration.

Originally the birth of Jesus was celebrated on 1/6.  But the church moved it to line up with the countless pagan celebrations taking place on or around 12/25.

In other words…again, Jesus was not the reason for the season.  The celebrations were all in place before the church moved Christ into the mix.

Santa Claus is given god-like powers.  He sees us when we’re sleeping, knows when we’re awake, knows if we’ve been bad or good so be good for goodness sake.  That is all very sweet but too often it is used to keep children in line and obedient.   Great come December but what about the rest of the year?  Not to mention many of those same parents who teach their children about Santa, implying that he is real, will freak out when someone says, “Happy Holidays” instead of “Merry Christmas”, because it removes Christ from Christmas.  Give Santa god-like characteristics but get  upset when Jesus is ‘removed’ by virtue of a holiday greeting? Seriously?  Not to mention that the church was guilty of some pretty un-Christlike behavior through the years if you check out this post about the origins of Christmas, among countless others, when celebrating the Lord’s birth.

Sorry, hijacking myself again.

Many different ‘faiths’ and religions celebrate different things at this time of year.  Many of those were in place long before Christ was added.  He isn’t the reason for the season, He is ONE reason for the season for SOME people.  Christ is important to the Christian celebrating His birth.  Others hold this time of year as important too.  Maybe Happy Holidays is just fine, as it enables the one wishing the happiness to just wish that, HAPPINESS, to the other.  Maybe we should all just relax!

Merry Christmas

Happy Hanukkah

Happy birthday (some folks celebrate those this time of year)

Happy anniversary (and those)

Whatever you celebrate, Happy Holidays!

Longing For A Simpler Time…

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I remember a simpler time in my life. 

Stores were closed on Sundays.  So were gas stations except along the highway and even then I’m not sure many were open.

McDonald’s was a treat, every 2 weeks when dad got paid.

Decorations didn’t go up for Christmas until Thanksgiving turkey had been eaten and everyone came back from grandmother’s house, through the woods and back over the river.  I don’t even know when this happened, maybe after the stores closed on the Wednesday prior to Thanksgiving?  I only know that come Black Friday everything magically was Christmas.  But never before Thanksgiving.

Fun was riding the bus downtown to see the windows and the train display at Cincinnati Gas & Electric.  It was free.  Now you have to PAY to see them at the museum.  I won’t go for that reason.

We looked forward to Christmas shows like Rudolph, and Charlie Brown, Frosty The Snowman, The Little Drummer Boy, The Grinch,  and Miracle  On 34th Street.

While we were not Little House On The Prairie, when one really nice, special gift for Christmas made it a wonderful year, this massive gift pile mentality was still not the norm for anyone that I knew.  We received a few toys, things we really wanted, but we also received things we needed, like socks, pajamas and underwear.  A batch of homemade cookies from anyone was a real gift!

Acura is running a commercial of late for the holidays, that says “listen to the voice of reason”.  What a novel idea!

We’re in an economy where a large number of people have no jobs, or haven’t had raises in years.  Seriously these commercials of fancy cars, diamonds and such are really not doing it for me.  Not that they ever have but my ex one time remarked, the Christmas right before he asked me for a divorce, that the car commercials were really good at making a guy feel guilty that he couldn’t buy his wife an Audi for Christmas.  I don’t know too many husbands that can afford to do so!  Unless it is a Matchbox car!

With money exceedingly tight this year, I’m wondering…why not go back to that simpler time.  Why not listen to the voice of reason?

Sure, I’d love diamonds and fancy clothes, or a new car.  Maybe a Kindle Fire, or iPad.  All very nice, don’t get me wrong.  But I do not NEED them.  And need is really far more important.

I was sitting here thinking, what are gifts that I need that I’d truly LOVE to receive?

A gift certificate to my hair salon.
Footie socks, 12 pair? (I go through them fast as I hate shoes).
Jammies!  I love jammies!
A gift certificate to Hobby Lobby, my favorite store EVER!
Essential oils, they are becoming increasingly more of a need for me!
A new phone.  It is a need as my current one is just shot.  And I can buy the phone outright!
Clothes for the new job I’ll be starting.
Gas cards – those are awesome.
Gift Visa Cards – I can then buy what I need as I need it!

Beyond that…there is not much I need!  What if we all actually just made a list of what we really need…chances are that it would be a lot more practical, and less expensive than the list of things we’d like to have.

Things That Go Fuzzy In The Night

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No, not things that go ‘bump’ in the night, though thanks to things going fuzzy there was plenty of bumping going on.  I mean fuzzy, as in my cat’s very favorite toy.  Her Fuzzy.  I don’t know what else to call it other than a fuzzy, as that is what it is, a little fuzzy thing.   She hides it between the wall and the dresser to keep the other cats from getting to it.  So far back in fact that she cannot get to it either.  I have to stick a ruler or hanger back there to retrieve it when she wants it.  Well until the other day, not sure where she had it hidden but it was somewhere under my bed.

During the night, around midnight, I woke up to what felt like demons under the bed.  Pixel was under there digging around for what I later would learn was her Fuzzy.  I drifted off to sleep again only to wake to the bumping noises as she was playing kitty cat soccer with her Fuzzy behind the desk, under the desk, under night stand, under the bed, and on and on.  I got fed up and crawled down on the floor, found Fuzzy and got back in bed.  With Fuzzy clenched in my hand I started to drift off to sleep again.  I felt whiskers, then she licked my fingers, then she started to paw at my fingers in an attempt to get to her Fuzzy.  I guess I fell asleep because later I woke to the bumps in the night…again.

I am a patient woman but this was getting to be a bit much.  Kitty soccer and then she was in the bag with a blanket I’m working on, then out of the bag and I had just about enough again.  I crawled out one more time, this time taking Fuzzy and when I got back in bed, it went under the pillow.  Pixel hunted high and low around the bed until she realized where it was, then she climbed up on my pillows and stared down at me like a furry vulture for a while.  When that didn’t work, she curled up next  to me, never  taking her eyes off me until she fell asleep.  She was still there this morning waiting for me to give  her back her Fuzzy.  Now she is curled up on the bed, sleeping  on the spot on my blanket where Fuzzy is safely hidden underneath so the other cats cannot find it.

I wish I could get that focused on any one area in my life!

Fuzzy

Bible Study With 167 Facebook Folks

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I love technology.

I love my church family.

I love my brothers and sisters in Christ.

I love studying God’s word.

Now, combine all that, through the brilliant idea of a college student and friend and you have a Bible study with 168 people (and growing) through a Facebook group for encountering Proverbs 27:17.

Proverbs 27:17

New King James Version (NKJV)

17 As iron sharpens iron,
So a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.

I was SO excited to be invited into this!  We are spending now through 2/23/13 studying through the book of Romans.  One chapter a week.  Not hard at all.  And interacting on the group. You cannot begin to imagine how sweet this is for me!  Some are folks I know, some are strangers, all are of a common interest and desire.

Thank you Jessie, this is a FANTASTIC group!

 

A 100% Refundable Candidate!!

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There is no way you could miss that it is an election year and that we are coming up on election day!   Both parties are pushing hard to get your vote with lots of promises, and if you are like me you are skeptical about them keeping most of those promises.

Your money and your family are important to you.  Jobs are important to us all.  And  there is something you can do to help the economy, the job market and your wallet:  VOTE TWICE!

Yes VOTE TWICE!  Cast your vote for president, and get out there and campaign  for your candidate.  But cast a second vote, for YOU!

I have a candidate that creates jobs daily for anyone that needs employment.

My candidate knows and IS quality at a very reasonable price.

This candidate is 100% refundable, send it back if you are not satisfied and get your money back!

My candidate is just a phone call away whenever you need something or have a question.  And THIS candidate will have answers.

My candidate? AVON!  Every day new representatives launch their own business, providing secondary income to their families. Some work it full time!

AVON has quality products that I would stand up against any department store brand not only in price but in satisfaction.

Shop from your seat, not your feet!  AVON comes to YOU so you can go green and save gas, not add to the pollution, and do all of your holiday shopping right from home!

Birthday, anniversary, holiday, or “oops I’m sorry” gifts, AVON has it ALL!

Check out the AVON platform at My Avon Store by clicking “shop eBrochure” on the side and look at what AVON has to offer!

Need employment?  Go to START AVON and use the code: martigardner  so YOU can start your very own work at home business!  It is only $10 to start and that is your full kit, free website and FREE training! You start making money right away!

Your vote DOES count!

Flagger Ahead!

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I’m a tad OCD.  Okay maybe more than a tad.  Order is important to me, certain things need to be a certain way.  Not everything, I don’t organize my clothes closet by color, season, and item.  But when a sign tells me something, like “hot surface” or “fresh paint” then that is what I expect to find.

So, I was driving along today, minding my own darn business and that of my sister, as she was in the car with me, when we came up on a bend in the road.   A sign had been placed on the side of the road that said “Flagger Ahead”.  I slowed down as it isn’t worth the pedestrian kill score stick figure for my back window, I don’t have time for that hassle today as I am in route to my favorite store, Hobby Lobby, for yarn to begin my next hooker project.  I slowed way the heck down, as many of these flaggers do not stand out like they should, despite their flashy, neon reflective vests and hard hats.  And do you know what we saw????? NO FLAGGER!  NONE!  Not a single person around in fact.  Just another sign, that said “Rough Road Ahead” and that it was, very rough, as someone had dug up the asphalt.  But NO flagger to be found.  In fact not a single worker in sight.  This is very distressing to someone with OCD, I kept waiting for the flagger to jump out of no where with his ‘STOP’ sign, then I’d accidentally hit him and that would start that nasty mess with the local law enforcers and well you know no one wants  that.

Then, on down the road, while still minding mine and my baby sister’s business, was another sign coming up on yet another work zone on the road, that said ‘CAUTION MEN WORKING’.  And again, NO one around! Not a single man or woman for that matter, to be seen, working or otherwise.  Just  lots of orange flexible fencing around a large hole in the road, lots of heavy equipment, but no men.  No one working, sleeping, sipping Long Island Iced Teas…just NO one.  My eye began to twitch after that.  Where are they?  The sign warns us, we slow down…and nothing.  Talk about a let down.  Heck, we live for the eye candy!

Speaking of eye candy, Delhi’s resident shirtless mowing, young fire fighter hottie was no where to be seen either.  Darn the luck.

My OCD is all static like now because of the let down in that nothing was where it was supposed to be or doing what it was to be doing as per the signs.

ARGH!!!!

Jealousy Is Indeed A Disease

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Having been on the receiving end of bullying growing up, I have a soft spot for those who must endure other’s senseless ridicule.  What is very sad is when a poor choice in life by someone, not thinking in the long term, becomes fodder for the bullies who just cannot let it go, and that person becomes so upset that they take their own life.  This was the case with a truly beautiful young lady from our area.  She made a poor choice to send a naked photo of herself to a boyfriend.  Before long that photo was everywhere.  I’m not certain of the details as to how the photo(s) made their way around, but if I had to guess I’d say a jealous girlfriend of the boy? Who knows, the point is that to take those photos and circulate them like that, in my opinion, makes the one circulating them partially guilty in her life ending.

My beautiful daughter

It is particularly sad to me because when the story broke, I noticed that the young lady looked a lot like my baby girl.  I’ll let you decide that for yourself.  Similar hair style, color and beautiful smile, just an all around pretty young lady.  Such a tragic loss of a young life because of the black hearted, evil spirited individuals I can only imagine were jealous of her.

My daughter is beautiful, both outside and inside.  She is one of the most giving, kind hearted people I have ever known.  She has such a gentle spirit and would do anything for anyone in need.  My baby girl has had her share of bullying over the years, it happens to pretty people.  Especially those with soft hearts.  Jealousy is one wicked, ugly disease.

What strikes me as even sadder about this situation is that my daughter has been bullied and stalked by a girl who became enraged when my daughter began seeing a guy who told her he was single.  It depends if you listen to him or the girl stalking my daughter, the boy’s ex-girlfriend, as to his attachment status at the time.  The attacks came hard and heavy after it was found out my daughter was seeing him.  And yes sleeping with him.  She is an adult, he is an adult, it was a mutual choice.  The ex even went so far as to make slanderous statements that my daughter was a whore and contracted HPV from the young man, supposedly that he received as a lovely gift from the former girlfriend.  After extensive testing, my daughter’s doctor informed her that no, she herself does not have HPV, nor has she ever had it.  Seems you have antibodies in your system if you did.  For the past year she has endured tests periodically to confirm this.

At first I felt bad for the young woman (this is not one I can call a lady by any stretch of the word and you’ll understand why here shortly), to not only have this disease but to have had this young man cheat on her, if that is in fact what he did.  He says no, she says yes. He claimed she was a psycho, and based on her behavior I’d have to say that is the case.  She was supposedly disowned by her own father for a while, because being the victim of bullying herself, she went off the deep end and landed in a pysch ward somewhere.  But I have stopped feeling bad for her because it has been a year since my daughter was with this young man, and this girl just cannot leave her be.  Constant veiled and not so veiled references on twitter, following her and I on Pinterest, and making continued unkind remarks whenever it seems she gets bored.

Recently a nude photo of my daughter, taken in a moment where she  herself lacked clear judgement, has made its way around.  We now know how, as not everyone this young ex-girlfriend turned stalker thinks is her  friend is really such.  In fact they were so appalled that after losing someone to suicide for such an act, that my daughter’s bullying stalker  herself would go and do such a thing.  We’ve learned that texts and images in texts are like anything on the Internet and in cyberspace, they carry digital fingerprints that make them easily traced back to their origins.  We’ve given very serious thought to legal action, as it seems to be the only way to get this person to stop.  Ignoring  her only fuels her fire, as does taking return shots at her.  For a while my daughter even removed herself from Facebook and Twitter, only to have this girl’s friends begin texting and calling her.  My guess is she is still in serious need of psychiatric assistance.

Yes, in case you haven’t figure it out, this girl, the bully, seems she was friends with the young lady from the article.  She  lost a friend because bullies couldn’t leave her alone and then circulated nude photos.  And yet, there she is doing exactly the same thing!  What a horrible way to honor a friend’s memory when their life ended in such tragic means.  I am betting the deceased girl’s parents would be so proud of their daughter’s friend.  Frankly it makes me sick to think she could suffer the loss of someone and have such an evil, black heart as to repeat what took her friend, on someone else.  Oh yes, jealousy IS indeed a disease, it eats the heart and soul.

My daughter will be the first to admit, she is a Christian, but a work in progress.  She has made mistakes, but then haven’t we all?  But she continues to follow the Lord and try hard to be the person she knows she should be.  When we talked tonight while she visited, we talked about how sad it is that this girl could lose a friend that way, then turn around and do the same thing.  That anyone’s soul could be so empty and evil, so full of bitterness and unkindness.  And then my baby girl reminded me that we need to just pray for this young woman, as God has said:

Matthew 5:43-48
[ Love Your Enemies ] “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust.

So, I have agreed with her, that while we are still uncertain about moving forward on pressing  charges, we will indeed pray for this girl.  And certainly I would ask my readers that are believers to also keep her in your prayers.  And from this point forward we won’t mention her again, here or on twitter, no tweets or posts even remotely aimed her way, and we will hope that in time she will move on with her life to better pursuits than attacking others, and that God will change her bitterness to happiness and joy in her life.

The Elf On The Where?

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I love the holiday season.  For me it starts Monday, October 1st and runs through New Years Day.  Halloween and all things spooky kick it off and it rolls through 3 months, 1 full quarter of the year.  Seems appropriate that deep winter follows, good time to hibernate after all of the activity.  I even coordinate my cell phone wallpaper and texting theme (I use GO SMS Pro) to the various holidays.

As  far as Halloween goes, I’m not into haunted houses unless it is the real deal, like Waverly Hills Sanitorium or some such truly haunted place.  I do not like masks on people, I need to be able to see their eyes to be comfortable. And I am no fan of anything or anyone jumping out at me or touching me.  In other words I am not one that likes being scared by pranks and stage makeup, but I am into paranormal type frights because I’m not scared by that, just fascinated.  I do enjoy the fun side of Halloween, like carving pumpkins and cute witches  and goblins that come ringing my doorbell, fun foods for parties and even a good costume party if folks dress creatively.

Thanksgiving is like intermission with food.  I enjoy food.  REALLY enjoy food, goes with being a Taurus, there is an ongoing love affair with all things delicious and edible, and a bittersweet relationship with the scale as a result.  Thanksgiving day is just for loading up on calories for energy for Black Friday shopping, and a great excuse to bring the family together.  Hopefully you don’t  wait for such occasions to have your family come by for dinner.  Around the Diva Den all it takes is a phone call in the afternoon and some creative combining of resources to produce a family dinner.

My all time favorite holiday is Christmas.  So much so that thanks to living in this very big house, we can have 2 trees, which is my dream.  I love decorating trees, and would have one in every single room!  Even my bedroom has a tree, a Charlie Brown tree :)  because it  is such a great Christmas show.  I love the decorations, smells, sounds…everything about this holiday rocks!  We have a tradition of watching “It’s A  Wonderful Life” on Christmas Eve after all the festivities are done and we’re in our jammies.

I want  to start a new tradition this year.  I get that in this house everyone is an adult, and while we believe in the spirit of Santa, we’ve gone beyond truly believing in the person.  However, traditions can be fun for adults even if they are mostly for kids.  Last year I stumbled on the whole Elf On The Shelf craze just after the holidays.  I think the entire thing is just adorable and my hat is off to the authors of the book, who have created a very special tradition in so many families around the globe.  Even though we are adults, I want to ‘adopt’ an elf and begin the tradition.  I’m checking out the local adoption centers, you can find your local centers on the website, Elf On The Shelf so you can adopt your own family elf.  For those parents looking for creative ideas for their elf to be found each day, I found this cute blog of 100 Mischievous Elf Ideas, they are great!

It is never too early or too late for that matter, to start thinking of ways to make holidays more fun and enjoyable for children young and old alike!

Not Welcome Here!

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I think at some point in life we all dream of having wealth and fame.  To be a household name, with enough money to do whatever we desire on our bucket lists without worrying about how we’re going to pay the electric bill when we are done with our latest adventure.  Pulling up in front of a hotel in our limo, crowds going wild over our appearance when the door opens and our feet, wrapped in only the best designer shoes, hit the red carpet as we are quickly escorted by our security staff through the crowd.  I have no idea what I’d want to be famous for, mind you.  I cannot sing and I’m not one that enjoys being center stage so not sure that kind of fame would do it for me.  And I cannot act either so being a famous movie star isn’t likely to be my ticket to stardom either.  But I sure would not mind all the money and the special treatment that goes with having your name in lights.

Regardless of what would make us famous celebrities, we can dream of that kind of fame.  But what about the responsibility that goes with that well-known name and star on the Hollywood walk of fame?  I’m not talking about being a role model, because sooner or later a sports hero or singer is going to do something we do not want our children to emulate.  I’m thinking more in terms of the idea that having money and notoriety not being a free pass to act irresponsibly or even cross the line into criminal behavior.

In an article I was reading the other day, Top Celebs Banned by Hotels, I was a bit disappointed by the behavior of some, and not at all shocked by the behavior of other well known names of fame.  The  behavior of some of these  people is just juvenile and in many cases would land the average person in jail.  Do these celebrities think that their fame and money makes it acceptable for them to behave this way?  And when are we as ‘fans’  going to start demanding more from those we are making wealthy by attending their concerts and movies?  I don’t mean more as in above average, I’m just thinking in terms of responsible, adult behavior!

One example being John Travolta.  According the article it would seem he has a little trouble keeping his hands to himself when getting a massage in some hotels.  Never mind that the advances are on male employees, the mere fact that he would do this to anyone turns my stomach!  I wonder how long it would take a hotel to show a guest lacking fame and wealth the exit door for such behavior?  And Lil Wayne, he must have quite the reputation if he cannot even check IN to the Wynn, his reputation having preceded his arrival.  And then there is Britney Spears, behaving in a way publicly that no parent would permit from a toddler during dinner.  Some on the rest of the list were a bit of a surprise, others not so much.

What makes these people think that they are some how exempt from acting with some maturity?  Or is it just me?  Read the article and let me know what you think!

So Many Pins, So Little Time

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*walks to the podium, head lowered, adjusts the microphone, and speaks softly, “hi, my name is Marti and I am a Pinterest addict”.  From around the world millions chime in, “Hi Marti…..”

Seriously, that would be me, where does one sign up for pinner anonymous?  And I am not alone.  It used to be I heard “oh, are you on Facebook? Add me!”  No one asks anymore, because pretty much most of the free world and then some are on Facebook, now everyone just adds you without asking.  That can be a tad awkward when you get friend requests from people you only know because you sat next to each other at a stop light.  And you know that isn’t  that much of an exaggeration.  Even folks in witness protection have a Facebook.   In fact, I find it difficult to trust anyone that is NOT on Facebook.  Like Long Beach, who you will remember has surfaced again.  He doesn’t have one.

For the record, I did give Tumblr a try, but frankly not impressed.

Pinterest…just WOW.   At first I didn’t get what the big deal was, what was so cool about it.  When I first wanted to check it out you had to be invited by someone else, making it feel like some really cool, virtual, exclusive club.  Now everyone and their grandmother’s maid is on there.  And it is no wonder everyone is on there!

Think of Pinterst as virtual bulletin board and filing cabinet for all of those things you see in a magazine that you want to keep.  Instead of stacks of magazines in the basement that you will never touch again because you cannot remember what it was you wanted to keep, you simply pin things to your boards under your account.  You organize it as you see fit.  At first I just did it for fun but now, I see the serious potential in this.  I pin recipes I want to try, decorating ideas for various holidays, tips for organization, cool looking rooms like home offices to give me ideas for the future.  I even have my dream board on there to motivate me for my business.

I’ve found myself actually using the pins too, like this one for example.  I have a pair of jeans that the zipper refuses to stay up.  Loose or tight fitting, this pair is one of my favorites that floats along with me as my weight shifts, but the zipper is always slipping down.  I saw  the  answer on Pinterest and pinned it:

Not sure who thinks of stuff like that, but thank you!  I LOVE this.

I have 79 boards that I pin things too.  Organization and cleaning tips are among my favorites.  I’ve tried to get my sister-in-law, Martinis Needed, to take the plunge but she is holding out on us.  She would eat this thing up! Even men are getting on Pinterest and pinning all kinds of stuff they want.  I could seriously see my ex-hubby and brothers doing it.  You can pin pretty much from any site and the picture lands on your board but clicking it takes you to the webpage or article you found it within.  I have a board of blogs I like to keep up with so I don’t have to try to remember them or find them in my ‘favorites’ list.  I can also follow others pins, either all of their boards or particular ones.  That was a trick to adjust to at first for me!  I have friends that are into cake decorating, I am not, so I don’t want to see 100 photos of cake ideas. But they have other boards I am interested in the items so I follow those and when something crosses my feed I like or want to remember, I repin to my boards from theirs.

Below is my Christmas Tree Board.  I LOVE Christmas and I’d have a tree in every room if they’d allow me too!  So far, 2 trees add to our decor each year, so far. Waaahaahaaaaaa!  And beneath that is my organization board. It is my shameless attempt to get Martinis Needed to try it out, as she IS the queen of all things organized.  You can click —> HERE to follow me on Pinterest.

Oops…

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I meant to be at church yesterday, but I forgot that I had committed to working at Harvest Home Fair.

But that is okay, I’ll be there, leave me a place on the back pew where  I cannot distract anyone!

Plan B Is Taking Shape

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I want to go on record here and say this:  The Biker is a great guy.  Really he is.  A heart of gold that is giving to a fault.  He loved me completely, didn’t try to change who I am, wanted me to soar free and true to myself.  He even encouraged my eccentric side, appreciating my pink hair and desire for more ink.  He loved my passion even when it was in the form of a royal hissy fit, he simply loved me down off the edge.  He did his best to take care of me and my various needs.  But it wasn’t ‘right’ for me.  Don’t get me wrong, I love him, but not that sweep me off my feet, full hearted, kind of love that can stand the fires of trials that will inevitably come along in life.  The love that grows old together in rocking chairs on the porch.  The very last thing I wanted was to break his heart, and not only once but twice now.   I broke it off before but went back.  See, I really do love him and care about him, and tried to make the 2 pieces of the puzzle that are The Biker and The Marvelous One, fit perfectly.  But they don’t.  It is a good thing that we did not get married in July as was the plan at one point.  Had we done  that I’d have made the best of things, holding to my vows and living life trying my best to be what he needed and wanted in a wife.  But I’d never have been  able to love with my whole heart, and that simply is not fair to him.  He deserves a woman that feels about him, the way he feels about me.

This is not the first time someone fell for me pretty much from first sight and then hard as time went by.  Like others he has wanted and loved me from a distance until I was available.  No, not being arrogant, I just am one of those women that men seem to get all wrapped up in, they all  tell me how they just knew I was the one from the first time they see a photo, meet me etc.  They tell me I am amazing, sexy, fun, passionate, full of life, the total package.  Then they all hit the ground running over time, I am a force of nature, very strong in personality and I do not bend easily.  Some call it stubborn, I prefer to call it strong willed.  The ex called it emotional, the Biker called it passionate.  Whatever it is, I’m not an easy woman to love.  The Biker loved me anyway and would have been happy to keep me, but I had to be honest that it just wasn’t there on my side.

So, here I am single and flying free but solo.  And I’m really very okay with that.  Plan B is in place again and unfolding slow and steady, and I feel very good about it.

Part of Plan B is getting my mojo back on my Avon business and staying focused.  The relationship derailed me for a while.  Direct sales can be a lot of work at first and as this is my full time job, I need to actually treat this as a job and work it.  I love what I do and embrace it.  I also am now a representative for SwissJust.  It will be work too.  So working 20-25 hours a week on each means full time in direct sales and  that means I have to focus.

Another part of Plan B is getting back to what  I love…writing!  I have 3 blogs that have been neglected for a while.  Time to blow  the dust off of my laptop and get back to my love of writing.  It takes several hours a week to keep up with them, not to mention my desire to write novels and it is time to get the ideas out of my head and into writing.

My faith has been part of Plan A, but on the back shelf.  Not anymore, it is back on the priority shelf with Plan B.  I’m returning to my bible studies and getting back into women’s bible study on Friday mornings.  Leaning toward returning to my former church again, it isn’t perfect for me but the doctrine is very sound and that matters more than anything else.

Tomorrow evening I start my kick boxing class.  2 nights a week for 1 hour each I will be in class kicking my way to better fitness.  And I will get back to walking again too a few mornings a week.  I NEED to get my weight back down and get in shape.  I’m not getting any younger, in fact I am going to be 50 in the spring, time to do something NOW.

All this activity aside, priority one is my family!  I have a granddaughter now, 7yo and full of energy and giggles.  I have a grandson on the way due around the holidays.  When I’m not doing all this other stuff I am crocheting things for the baby and my granddaughter.

I’m BUSY!!!!!

I’m happy pursuing Plan B right now.  I’m not sure where to fit a relationship into all this that is currently on my schedule.  Dinner and a few beers, sure I can do that.  But I don’t have the time to give to someone, to nurture love and the relationship.  If I felt I was missing out on something right now, that I NEEDED a man in my life, and the right one came along, then I’d adjust accordingly.  But that is the issue, I’m not feeling like I need one.

So, make no mistake, my beloved Biker will always be a very dear friend, and will make some woman a very cherished and adored princess, but it won’t be me.  Being cherished and adored was wonderful, but I cannot give back what is not in my heart to give.  If there is a Mr. Right for me, he’ll find me. Until then, I’m living my Plan B and loving life!

Dust Bunnies From Under The Couch

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Last week while mom was in the hospital, my sister and I cleaned the house.  Oh I mean we REALLY cleaned the house.  As in moved the furniture and vacuumed, dusted, purged (read: threw out all the crap).  If you know anything of my sister-in-law from over at Martinis Needed, you know that her sweet, OCD self must have everything “Mr. Spiffy” clean.  For those not familiar with Mr. Spiffy, I recommend you watch the Backyardigan’s episode, “What’s Bugging You”.   We jokingly say it ain’t clean if it ain’t Angie clean.  Mr. Spiffy would likely fall short of her standards.  We were shooting for Angie Clean.  We came close!

It is always an adventure to move anything around here and look under it.  Assorted dust bunnies are a given, but with 3 cats also in residence, you will find secret stashes of their various stolen treasures.  One of the cats used to swipe coins from around the house and hide them under the rug in the kitchen.   That came to a halt when we discovered it a few too many times, and we’ve yet to locate her new hiding place.  Not sure if she was saving up for a bus trip to escape but she always had at least a few dollars in random change.  This time, we found not only cat treasures, but enough plastic food to stock a small, toddler grocery store.  Seems when I was in the childcare business here, the little people were shoving it under furniture.

Me and my granddaughter, Little Red, this past Monday.

Memories can be a lot like those dust bunnies, until you actually go looking for them or the couch of life is moved, you don’t know they are there.  My son, his wife, and my adorable granddaughter stopped over Monday for a visit.  HIJACKING: I absolutely LOVE being a grandma, best role in life EVER!!!  One reason being in order to be a grandparent you had to have been a parent, and I have the best kids.  *Return to Blog*  Somewhere the topic came up of our blood types and I mentioned I knew my son’s because it was on his crib card in the hospital.   He asked if I still had that so I went up and brought  down my memory box.  It is a wood box with a hinged lid that my brother, Yatz, made for me in high school.  I have special, “in case of fire” items in there.  I had to explain that means in case of fire in the house grab that box while exiting.  I have in there the outfits my kids came home from the hospital wearing, their crib cards, their bracelets, and countless other items.  My granddaughter had a lot of laughs looking at old photos of not only her daddy, but her uncles, aunt and grandma too.  It was a lot of fun going through that box again, and if your past photos popped up on Facebook, blame my son. :)

The winds of time blew the Long Beach dust bunny out from under the couch of life.  I know, very interesting timing.  Right in the middle of writing my post the other day about the Biker and I going our separate ways, I  received a text from him.   I didn’t even have his phone number anymore, was clueless at first who was messaging me.  Last time I had heard from him he was vowing to change my mind about all men being pigs, contrary to what the ex-husband told me, and I was dumping live piranhas in the mote and pulling up the drawbridge to this princess’s castle!  He had NOT changed my mind, by the way.   He tells me he is coming this way in a few weeks or so, to take me to dinner.  I will believe this when the food and the drink land in front of me on the table while I’m listening to him tell me about himself in his delightful, Irish accent.  If by some miracle this actually happens, I assure you there  will be a photo to prove it. (don’t hold your breath, dear readers, I’m certainly not!)

Another dust bunny was found beneath the couch of life today.  A former neighbor growing up (we’re talking when I was very young), found and commented on a blog post of mine. Pat is his name.  He used to live next  door and after hearing about the health of another former neighbor, dear sweet Annie, decided to look up our family and track us down to say hello.   A few shared remembrances there, very pleasant ride down memory lane again.

And here I thought I’d have nothing to write about today!

Yet Another Lesson From My Cat

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I’ve noticed my beautiful baby has a tendency to sleep…a lot.  If reincarnation was a reality, I’d want to come back as a pampered house cat.  Mine is pretty darn pampered.

Lately my baby has been irritated  with me and hasn’t slept in my room, let alone with me in weeks.  My being in love and in a relationship seems to have threatened her comfort level.  Not to mention being a cat she is highly OCD and if I am gone over night it totally screws up her neat little world.  I completely understand that, I’m learning that I am not only rather ADD but I have some serious OCD issues, and I do NOT like my neat little world order messed with one bit.

If I sleep away from my home, anywhere other than my room, it messes with my brain for days.  In my room I have created for myself a haven, a nest of sorts.  It is MY space, and I researched  color psychology when choosing the color in order to have an atmosphere of peace and tranquility here.  When I am stressed, being in this room calms me down and helps me think.  When sad, my room helps sooth my nerves and bring me a feeling of peace.  It is the one place that is all mine, not shared with anyone but my cat.  And in her world, for things to be balanced, she expects to find her mama sleeping there at night.  She seems to sense that I am mentally and emotionally fragmented the past 24  hours, and headed for a slight melt down.  She was on my dresser, one of her favorite hang outs, when I got into bed last night.  As soon as I turned off the light she jumped down on the bed and curled up by my leg, where she remained the entire night.  She left in the early hours of the morning just before the sun rose, then returned and stayed until I woke up.  Then she came and curled up by my head for a love fest of ear and chin scratches and purring.  Now today she has followed me all over the house like my shadow.

The  foundation of life has been yanked out from under me a bit the past 24 hours or so.  Well okay, more like just rocked hard.  Too much too fast and I’m overwhelmed to say the least.  I noted that when Pixel gets ‘stressed’ she goes off to a dark, cool place and sleeps.  Being one that hates the dark and fears it, I prefer at least soft light coming in the window.  But I’m all over the cool temps and sleeping.  So I did that.  I turned on my fans in my room, providing a nice ‘white noise’ that kept me from hearing anything else.  I shut my door and curled up on my bed and just slept.  Pixel got up on the dresser and watched over me while I was sleeping.  My thoughts are still in slivers, but I’m letting them just cascade down until all of the pieces fit into a picture that makes some sense to me.  It was not a real restful nap, but long and it did help some.  I considered crawling under the bed  and hiding, another trick of Pixel’s when she needs her  space, but I am pretty certain my big butt wouldn’t make it under there and I’m too claustrophobic to find it anything but unnerving.

A song came to mind (I love how healing and soothing music can be) when I first laid down to nap, it’s been stuck in my head since.  So, I leave you with one of the few Beatles songs I really love.