Archives

We’re Putting The Tree Up

The trees went up last night..as in they are out of the boxes, up and lit.  After digging through a variety of containers it became obvious we were lacking some things.  Seems last year when they packed up the Christmas stuff, the other Divas tossed a lot of things.  So we had it on hold for tonight to actually decorate the tree.

My daughter got Lord Voldemort to help her with the tree there.  All she had to do was start pulling stuff out and trying to move that casket size box up the stairs herself  (the damn thing weighs about as much as a  body loaded end of life container) and her daddy was helping her. Her, the boyfriend and her dad decorated over there. That cracks me up, that girl has that man wrapped so tightly around her finger.  He would say otherwise but grumpy old Walter said over and over he would NOT have another dog in that house ever.  Enter Okeloni, the 2 year old Akita my daughter recently adopted from a shelter.  Yes, she has her daddy wrapped alright.  I was glad Scrooge decided to help her out and they were able to begin a new  tradition even if it is without me.  I was always the one to get it out, put it up with my kids, Ebeneezer rarely did much of that. Talk about a little black rain cloud hanging over the holidays.

I admit to being a bit apprehensive about this Christmas.  All of the ornaments that hold sentimental value to me are over hanging on the tree at the ex-husband’s house.  I have nothing of mine here.  This is my favorite holiday and time of the year, and I’ve always loved decorating the tree.  So when my daughter called to tell me she was bringing my  nativity that she and her brother had bought me years go I was thrilled.  I also requested a particular ornament that holds very strong sentimental value to me and she brought it too.  I love that kid.

Today the Divas went shopping to find ornaments for our tree.  I picked out one  just for me, my  first initial in silver, with gem stones.  And then I found another, a silver fire place that says “Our First Christmas In Our New Home”.  I  bought that one too.  Now I feel much better, like I have something in the mix here.

And now, we are going to begin to decorate the trees, complete with shatter proof ornaments as suggested by my daughter.  The cats already have taken to climbing the damn trees. One received a squirt bottle enema when I shot her off a branch.  She in turn stalked the tree thinking the tree attacked her.  That would be Ditzy!

I Am A Ninja Warrior

I am armed and dangerous  to my prey.  I hunt them down, a lethal assassin I am, stalking quietly until the perfect moment to attack.  I show  no mercy when I kill my targets, often leaving behind their mutilated bodies as a warning to others.  I am a ninja warrior…

My sister is deathly allergic to most types of bees, wasps etc.  Over the years, when she would get stung, the reactions grew more severe, causing her to always be in possession of an Epi-Pen when outside.  The reactions now are deadly, she must carry two such pens to be administered immediately while a life squad is summoned, as the contents of the pen will only hold her over until the paramedics can arrive and take over life saving efforts.  I am allergic as well, though my reactions are far behind hers in severity, but they do worsen with each sting just not as dramatically as Diva Boo’s.

My Ninja sword is swift and powerful, and when I swing it, it crashes into my unsuspecting victims, filleting them into many pieces, ending their tormenting of others….

We in the Princess Palace keep a fly swatter handy when on the deck for killing any pesky insect that happens along at the wrong time.   We are territorial women when it comes to our food and personal space and frankly don’t care for anything that has more than 4 legs (and then you better have fur!).  Flies, bees, spiders, moths….we refuse to share our space, it is us or them, and it is always them!

I am well  trained, having a double pink belt to my name and my attire strikes fear in the heart of those I hunt along with my cold, black eyes…

So there I am this morning, sitting on the deck enjoying coffee with my mom and sister, when a damned bee comes along and begins to torment my sister.  Had it just flown on by after we shooed it we would have not had any issues.  However it has been very chilly of late over night and the stinger brigade is getting vicious as their time nears an end.  This one was persistent, guess he didn’t know who he was messing with here!  I grabbed the fly swatter, game on baby!

Now picture this scene…3 women, in jammies and bath robes, bed head, and coffee cups.  I have on my flamingo pajamas…white tank top with one little pink flamingo embroidered on the lower side of the top near the hem.  The shorts are mint green and white stripes, then covered with embroidered  pink  flamingos all over them, 3 cute little pink buttons and a pink elastic waistband.  I am also sporting my pink, fluffy bathrobe that just happens to be the same color pink as that of the flamingos, complete with a pink belt.  My bed head could take the gold medal at the bed head international games and my eyeliner and mascara are smeared on my face and eyelids because I was too damned tired  to wash my face before I went to bed last night.  One so very sexy sight to behold, I’m just scary sexy!

And there I am, armed with  the pink fly swatter, I nailed that little bastard in one swipe leaving him in about 6 pieces on the plastic.  One good tap  on the deck railing and his mangled  remains fall to the lawn as fertilizer.  Damn I am getting good, that is the 3rd one in 24 hours that I got on the first smack down.  Granted not nearly as impressive as when I squash wolf spiders with my bare fist but a stunning display none the less.  Hopefully  no one got that on video for YouTube.

Called into action by the screams of a damsel in distress, I bear down on her assailant and attack with my deathly sword, sending him to meet his maker.  Be afraid, be very afraid…

Don’t fuck with me…..


jscreationzs / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Do It Yourself Divas

What do you get when you have 5 women, 2 cats and a 2500 square foot house?  The need for a handy man!  At one time or another all  of us had the benefit of having a man living in the home in the form of dad, brothers, husband or step-dad figures.  Now there is only estrogen to be found in our princess palace which means we either have to outsource projects to some willing male family member or friend, or we have to learn to do it ourselves.  Lately we’ve opted for the do-it-yourself approach.  It isn’t that we have anything against men, after all if they are good eye candy what woman wouldn’t want them around working on the house?  But it is inconvenient when we have to wait on them to squeeze us into their schedules.

On moving day we did have 5 men from a local moving company merge us from two houses into one.  Two of these guys were good looking and one was an absolute hunk!  We enjoyed watching all that muscle in action, no complaints!  Once the boxes and furniture were in the house, we took over and made hundreds of trips hauling things up and down over the 4 floors of our new home.  Lacking the muscle of these hunky young men, we wore ourselves out doing many tasks that a man could easily have managed.  BUT we did it, all by ourselves without assistance.

Since moving in we’ve all attacked and mastered everything from hanging full length mirrors, unclogging toilets, setting up a wireless network, learning to check and add oil to a car, and using tools for a host of things that required some assembly including a gas grill.

Do-it-yourself-Diva

Even the dryer ventilation was fixed one night by 2 of the Divas.  Find a creepy crawler or a spider? Those are no match for us, including those big, furry looking ones the size of a hand. All die upon detection, we don’t mess around!  Unless the cats find it first then they play with it for a while before making it an appetizer (ewww).

Our most recent project was giving the patio furniture a face lift.  Our budget doesn’t have a lot of wiggle room for the purchase of new patio furniture.  My ex-husband-to-be gave me our old patio table and 6 cushioned chairs.  This set, while sturdy, was rust covered and the cushions need replacing badly, but at least we had a table on the deck and something to sit on.  We did purchase 2 nice chairs on sale, in black, and had a rain check for 4 more when the store restocks.  One evening while sitting outside on the deck we were brain storming what could be done to improve the look of the current items.  We decided that we could paint the table (glass in a metal frame) and chairs (all metal) and at the very least it would be an improvement.  About $50 worth of Rust-Oleum paint and some serious ambition mixed in with a little creative thinking, and my sister and nieces have transformed the set, it looks brand new!  They even found Rust-Oleum paint for plastic chairs and painted the 2 old green ones we had a deep red!  This weekend we’ll purchase new cushions for the chairs and have a slick furniture set sitting outside.

We still need men around from time to time for projects beyond our scope of knowledge or abilities, but it sure is nice to be able to do it ourselves whenever possible!

Saturday Seance At The Princess Palace

Yesterday was supposed to be a very busy day but even the best  intentions fall victim to mother nature at times.   My sister and  I were signed up to participate  in Paint The Town yesterday.  We got up early (5:30am), put on old jeans and gym shoes, grabbed a couple of  baseball style  hats and headed to Norwood Plaza.  It was raining but not  too hard so we had high  hopes of it stopping.  When we got there  we were so happy to see that  so many people were already there,  apparently rain doesn’t dampen the heart of  volunteers at that these  events.  Despite the  fact that everyone was  getting thoroughly soaked everyone was upbeat and enjoying eating breakfast in the drizzle.  We got our t-shirts and water bottles before grabbing our  breakfast and mingling with others.

2 of the Paint The Town 59 houses

Sadly the rain not only continued but it turned into a serious down pour and after checking radar the event was canceled and moved to July 10th.  Knowing that many of the over 1000 volunteers  won’t be able to come back that date,  and there  are 59 houses  to be painted in less than 8  hours, there is a need for more people willing to give up their day to make a neighborhood look nice.  These are neighborhoods in serious  need of some TLC so if you have time and don’t mind working with some nice people, being fed breakfast and lunch, come join us.  I’ll be posting more information as it is available.  Our team is painting one  of 2 houses, side by side.  We were given a drive by view to see our projects before being sent home looking forward to this upcoming project.

Plan B became grocery shopping for the Diva Den.  I went with mom to knock out that trip.  With our grocery list in hand and a request that I make black bean chili for dinner,  we headed out to load up on food for the coming two weeks.  Two stores and a couple of Foursquare updates later, we went to the Burger King drive through to grab lunch and headed home.   It was sunny and HUMID all of the  late  afternoon,  it was just flat out  uncomfortable  outside, I am SO thankful  for central air conditioning!

I made the chili and set  some aside  for dad and then mom and I ran that to him and picked up a  few  things he needed from the store.  Two trips to Kroger in one afternoon,  we should have our own parking spot and check out lane  as often as we are there.  Dad is not able  to drive anymore so he has to rely on us and friends to either run him to complete his errands or run them for him.  Next time we need to think ahead and call him when we make OUR trip to the stores.   We opted to skip the Reds game last night  as it was so hot and humid that just sitting in the shade we started to sweat and the threat  of rain was very likely.   Jeannette and I had  already had our share of getting soaked  to the gills.

Saturday, as mentioned in other blogs, is  wine night in  our home.   We wait until all  of us  are home for the evening then try a new wine,  or two.  My sister had picked up 2 new  ones at the store  on Friday and mom and I had  gotten cheese and crackers on our grocery trip.  We were sitting outside on the deck  waiting on Sarah  to return when the ‘severe’ thunderstorm warning was issued for our area.  The  lightening show was impressive out to the west and just before Sarah pulled in the storm hit.  Judging from the debris in the yard and on the deck,  and the 2 shutters and damaged siding on the neighbor’s house  it must  have  been more intense than we realized.

Anticipating a power outage we had a bunch of candles lit on the dinning room table and opened the blinds and turned off most of the lights.  It was a relaxed atmosphere but we figured the neighbors  likely think we were over here having a midnight seance.    The  power did not go out but we  left it this way just because.  At one point we were all being goofy and started singing songs,  or pieces of them.  Jeanne ran and got her laptop,  and then so did Jeannette.  Before long we had the actual songs playing and were looking for more good ones to sing along too,  it was Princess karaoke.   I have no idea what  time Sarah  slipped away to go to bed,  but I went up at 2:30  this morning, and my mom and sister were still up singing at 3:00am.  I slept  in until 11:30 and the only reason I even crawled out of  bed  was fear  that Pixel  would  need the litter box.  Next week the Divas have decided  to try some of the various imported and micro brewery beers that the  store has in stock, so that should be interesting.  Now every other week Saturday is  Divas uncorked, the others will be Pop The Top nights. All female friends and family are welcome to attend our Saturday night ‘seance’ gatherings, we can even bed you down for the night if you have too much.  Just let us know you are coming so we plan for it!

OH and before I forget, these are the two wines we enjoyed this week:

Our Saturday Seance wine selections

Forgotten Chocolate & Diva Dynamics

HAPPINESS IS:  Finding a chocolate bar in your purse that you purchased a few days ago.  Every choco-holic woman out there is asking “how do you forget you have chocolate??”  I know, I know!! It was because I bought it at the vet’s office Saturday when I had Pixel there for her first visit.  Someone was selling them for a fund raiser and I’m a push over for chocolate so I bought it.  Then I had to put some paper work in my purse, was juggling the kitten and  it slipped down inside my purse, forgotten.  I just found it and it is SO good!

All of us in the Diva Den have experienced questionable reactions when telling someone about our living arrangements.  Few seem to understand how 5 women can live under one roof peacefully.  My guess is they know of young ladies that go off to college as bosom buddies, share a dorm room or apartment, and end up unable to stand each other.  No one seems to believe that we actually have a very harmonious household with the pool of hormones we’re currently swimming in.  It is something I call Diva Dynamics.

While there are some that have referred to it as a Princess Palace, and don’t we all have an inner princess, there is no room for anyone to have a Princess complex, no one in the house has staff (except the cats).  And no one within the house is a Cinderella, we are all responsible for keeping the house clean and in order.  If you make a mess you clean it up.  If someone does leave behind a mess we give the benefit of the doubt, maybe they were in a hurry or got side tracked, and the finder steps up and handles it.   We all accept that in order to live in a house this large it takes all 5 of us to keep things in order and it isn’t fair for it to fall on any one persons shoulders.  Everyone takes responsibility for keeping their own room clean, and we’re all obligated to maintain the bathrooms, living and dining rooms, family room and kitchen. If you cook dinner one night, everyone else cleans up and handles dishes.

We keep a grocery list on the refrigerator and anytime someone uses the last of something, or notes supplies are low they add those items to the list.  Everyone knows where to find the toilet paper, paper towels, shower supplies etc and no one believes in the restock fairy in our Den, we’re ALL fairies and we all know how to replenish where needed.  We all look pretty adorable in our wings and tiaras too!  We keep a pitcher that filters water in the refrigerator and when you use it to fill your water bottle, you fill the pitcher, very simple.  It is not uncommon for one of us to ask the others if they have laundry that needs to be done, so that when the washer gets ran it is for a full load.  Or if, while doing laundry, we notice enough there in the laundry room for another load, we just do it.   We all know how to fold clothes once the dryer stops, and everyone puts the clean towels away.  At night before going to bed every Diva knows to scan the common areas for her own things and take them to her room as she heads up.  Even the coffee pot is loaded and ready when we go to bed because those of us that drink it make sure it is set up each night.

We all respect each others private spaces, our bedrooms, and each others personal property.  You don’t use it without asking the owner.  Since we are all connected via our BlackBerry phones, we’ll message each other for permission before using or borrowing anything from one another.   Number one rule, if it isn’t yours you don’t use it or eat it or wear it without permission from the person that claims ownership.

We Divas haven’t gone completely green but we do try to do our part.  We all use a water bottle for a few weeks rather than going through cases of bottled water.  We found a good way to individualize our bottles was to buy hair holders/elastic bands and each use a different color.  We found some with plastic jewelry so each bottle has bling, very Diva like!  We fill up from the filtered pitcher and no spread of colds etc.  We reuse anything we can, save our aluminum can tabs for charity and try not to waste.  There are no tree huggers in the group but we do try to make good use of what we have.

My bottle bling


I think part of the reason this all works so well is because we are all family first, then friends.  Family has each others backs, loves each other no matter what.  We all allow for each other to have faults and make mistakes and we don’t hold that against each other.  We talk out problems when they do arise and try to find a solution or compromise that leaves everyone happy.   We’re all very protective of each other and if one of us hurts, we all hurt with them.  If someone hurts one of us from outside they just raised the wrath of the entire Den, heaven help them.  We also are all supportive of each other in everything from weight loss to trying to break habits like biting nails or cursing.   We can tease each other, all of us are able to dish it out and take it well, but we also know not to get to carried away to where someone gets their feelings hurt with it.

When it comes to matters that will impact the whole household, we have a pow-wow.  We had one when we first moved in to discuss any and all home improvement projects anyone noticed needed addressing. We talked about solutions, and got those prioritized by weighing in pros and cons until we all agreed on what needs fixing first.   A pow-wow can be called to address any issues that arise if someone thinks it is needed.   We all know that if it will impact the household, the Divas all have a say and if we cannot reach a compromise or agreement then whatever it is cannot happen.

We all understand that we are family, friends, and a team and there is no ‘I’ in the word team.  Someone said we are like a mini sorority.  While we are all individuals, we also have to function as a unit in order for this to work, and so far I think the Diva Dynamics are working very well.

Rosie Sow

The Diva Den has a new member, Rosie Sow.  Rosie is a ceramic pink piggie bank, sporting a tutu and a tiara.  In the midst of the moving hoopla over the weekend my sister and Jeanne were at Target in search of needed items when Jeanne spied Rosie lounging on a shelf.  Because Rosie is decked out as a Diva they felt she was needed in the household.  We all agree she is a perfect fit. She was given the place of honor on the kitchen counter next to the coffee maker.

Now I need to be up front, Rosie is my personal name for our counter top royalty, we have not all agreed to a name for her as of yet because we’ve just been too busy getting settled.   I hope the other chicks don’t mind but she needed a name for the blog and calling her a pig just seemed rude, and we in the Diva Den are all about positive reinforcement and supportive words and all against negative energy or tearing each other down. We are  our own greatest support network and Rosie being a part of the team she needs to be treated with respect.  Besides she has a tiara which makes her a princess like the rest of us in the palace so Rosie it is.

The original purpose for Rosie was all loose change would be fed to her and over time we’d build up quite the savings to be put toward a yet to be determined goal.   We have a household emergency account set up so we will probably use the sow savings for something fun.  Either way Rosie is quickly putting weight on her ham hocks as each day we all add any left over change from our pockets and purses to her tummy.

I mentioned in an earlier blog that in the this household we say ‘fuck’ a lot.  We get it, not a lady like word but hey, we’re Divas, we do what we want when we want.  Mom noticed over these past few days that we have a lot of little kids in the neighborhood, several living on either side of us.  The houses are not on top of each other, there is good distance between, but the little tykes trek through the back yard to each others to play.  Inside the house we really cannot hear much room to room as the house is very large,  and the walls have great insulation that buffers the noise quite well.  However if you walk around the house, as mom did,  you will hear a good deal as you pass under windows.   This means those adorable children are unwillingly enrolled in Cursing 101.  We all know we need to eliminate the F-bomb from our vocabulary and now we have good reason to make it a goal.  Let these kids parents educate them in swearing, we need to set a better example.

Mom decided that every time one of us drops the big F word, we should have to deposit  50 cents in Rosie.  At the rate my sister and I let that one fly we could fatten pinkie up to her tiara in a week!  In fact just yesterday my sister walked out and fed Rosie $5 to cover her extensive use of the big bad word.  I managed to squeak by on $1.   We all agreed to come up with a more acceptable expression and now Farkle (a favorite game for many of us on Facebook) has become the substitute for “fuck” in our house.  We Divas know that if Farkle is used it is a big curly tailed deal, but the neighbor kids won’t be taking home any new words that might get them a time out on the naughty step.

To go along with her new status as the language monitor Rosie has been elevated to the top of the refrigerator.  We needed her spot on the counter for the toaster and frankly she looks more appropriate up high looking down on us all keeping watch over our phraseology and reminding us that too many trips to the contents of the fridge and we’ll start rounding out like our little pink porker.

Rosie Sow

Dessert First

I had a friend, Janie, that used to say if you went out to dinner some place fancy you should order dessert first.  Her reasoning was that the dessert in most 4 or 5 star places is usually the best part, and you wouldn’t want to choke on your meal and die having missed dessert.  I always loved her way of thinking, go for the best part first!

A number of years ago my husband and I were kinship foster parents to 4 kids.  My cousin is a navel officer and his wife lost parental rights over their kids and he was heading to Iraq for a year.  We took in the kids who were 2, 4, 5 and 8 at the time.  The year was tough at times, rewarding at others.  4 little kids with a lot of emotional baggage but I won’t go in to that.  We tried our best to offer a home full of love, stability and FUN!  We had all kinds of special weekly ‘events’ like Crazy Hair Day – a day to wear your hair totally crazy just because we could.  The 2 girls sporting 8 or 10 pig tails all over their heads, the boys with their hair spiked up on end.  Some days were jammie days, we stayed in our pajamas the entire day, again just because we could.  Fridays were always a hit though! I worked 3 days a week at the time, 12.5 hour days, so I could have Monday and Friday off while they were with us.  Fridays we had Turkey Surprise for breakfast.  Their dad had called chocolate chip pancakes Wild Turkey Surprise and I wanted to keep their connection to him as much as possible so that was the Friday breakfast, only I would jokingly call it Turkey Poop Surprise.  Friday nights were always movie night, everyone in their jammies then popcorn and a movie starting at 8pm.  But the best part of Friday was Dessert First night.  On Fridays we always had dessert first, and if you did not eat all of your dessert you were not permitted to have dinner.  This was one night the kids absolutely loved beyond all the other fun and believe me even the 2yo knew what night was Dessert First.   It didn’t take long for us to realize that there was no need to make dinner those nights, rarely did anyone actually eat their dinner. I learned much during that year, and one of the things I learned was from Dessert First.  Go for the best, most important part first!

This weekend the Drama Divas will have the keys to our new home.  Saturday morning we will receive the keys, the current occupants are moving Thursday and want to clean on Friday so we can move into a clean home.  With any luck things will fall into place and the movers will be able to move us on Saturday.  We are ALL excited!

Originally I had wanted the first night for me and my sister.  This was mostly just because I want to get out of the house I share with my ex and I cannot wait so I don’t care if I am sleeping on the floor alone, I just want OUT.  My sister said she was going with me so I wasn’t alone, which I love her to pieces for doing.  We all had planned to paint our bedrooms before we all moved in the house.  But now I’m thinking why wait?  Sure we can paint easier with empty rooms, no doubt about that.  However we can still paint with the furniture there it will just be a bit more work.  The best part of this move is all of us being under one roof together without me having to leave each night and sleep else where.  To finally all be under one roof as one happy family.  I talked to mom on the drive in this morning and assured her that all of us moving in is way more important than painting or being there with my sister, it is all of us girls together that is the best part – our dessert first.  The painting and decorating is secondary to us all being together for me, so I want my cake first.  None of us have rooms currently in colors we cannot manage for a few days until the new paint goes up on the walls.

Hopefully mom can find a reputable mover that can get us moved in this Saturday.  Then Saturday night when Sarah is home from work, we’ll open up a bottle of wine (we need to find a special one for this occasion with a very special name suited to the event) and we will have our dessert first, our first night all under one roof together.  We’ll wake up Sunday morning for the first time in the Diva’s Den/Estrogen Tank, have coffee and breakfast together in our new house all together.  The rest, the painting and decorating,  is just extra icing on our cupcake, for now we’d just like that cupcake!

**additional sprinkles on my cupcake:  My new laptop shipped and estimated delivery is this Friday. My bedding shipped this morning!!!! **