Monthly Archives: September 2010

10 Things I Love About Fall

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Mama's Losin' It

I love the Fall for the change in temperatures.  Oh I am a total warm weather fan, but I love being able to wear my warm, soft, fuzzy on the inside sweat shirts.  Especially hoodies, I need that pocket on the front to put my cell phone, keys and other items in when I am out and about.

Having the windows open due to the change in the temperatures is nice too.  Cooler outside and less humidity, even on a day when it is in the mid 70′s like today, the windows are open and the breeze blowing through, and sleeping with the windows open is even better!

Football season is in full swing, and I LOVE football!  Ohio State, UC and of course the Cincinnati Bengals are  my teams, I just love watching them!

Fire pits are another plus.  Sure, there are some cooler evenings in the summer when you can use them, but it is so nice to be able to sit around the fire pit with coffee or a couple of beers, with friends and snacks and just relax on any given weekend.  I love the smell too.

Speaking of smells, there is nothing like the smell of fire places if you are out walking on a cool, Autumn night.  Kinda puts me in a romantic frame of mind.

The return of the holidays is on the horizon, and I LOVE the holiday season.  But for now, the hay rides, cider, and Halloween are all fun and all put a smile on my face.

Time to for hooking again when the Fall weather sets in!  I love to crochet but when it is hot out it is miserable to have a big blanket over my lap.  Fall weather means I can pick up the yarn and my hook and snuggle under my latest project.

While shorter day light time isn’t a real thrill, I tend to get more sleep in the Fall.  My body says it is bedtime once it gets dark so I tend to go to bed much earlier than I do in the summer.  It is like my major recharge time once the days grow shorter.

Food changes with the seasons, the focus moving from cookouts and burgers to chili and stews in the Fall.  I LOVE when it is time to mix up the meals and start changing what we serve.   Last night we dined on strawberry almond salad for the last time, as the strawberries need to be fresh for this to be a great meal.  Chili, soup, stew, all of these will now become part of our menu.

And last but not least…change in the outside world around me.  I LOVE the colors of this time of year!  I am blessed to live in an area of the country where we get to experience all 4 seasons fully.  This makes us appreciate each one all the more.  Fall brings about the leaves on the trees changing color, mums in  bright oranges, amber and gold, even the air takes on a different smell, you can detect the change with your nose!

2 Truths & A Lie

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BWS tips button

Welcome! Tell 2 truths and a lie and make us guess which is the lie.
You’ve played this game before, so why not join The Scoop on Poop and CA Girl every Thursday by:
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Okay readers/visitors, can YOU determine which 2 are truths and which one is the lie? Leave your guesses in the comment section, then stop back next Thursday when I will let you know what is true and what is fictitious!

1. I LOVE liver and onions!  Slap some fresh peas next to it on the plate and we have DINNER baby!

2.  My sport of choice to participate in growing up was track.  I ran track for 2 years, though I never was any good at the long distance, I was a sprint runner.

Andy Newson / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

3.  My favorite TV  show of all time, that will pull me away from the computer and onto the couch is CSI:NY.  I think Gary Sinise is sexy as hell and everything stops when that show is on my TV!

Okay, which is the lie and which are the truths? YOU tell me!

Applications No Longer Being Accepted

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~*~  ~*~  ~*~

“I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.”
~ Marilyn Monroe

~*~  ~*~  ~*~

I LOVE that particular quote, it is very much how I feel.  I am selfish, my life is all about me and the world I move in revolves around me.  I am definitely impatient, when I want something I want it NOW.  And insecure? Sure, I think everyone is insecure.  While I am very comfortable in my own skin and with who I am, there are days I lack confidence in my own abilities.  Mistakes – oh boy do I make some doozies, left to my own devices I can chalk up some gold medal winners single handedly.  Out of control is another given, I have a temper and I have been known to throw a class ‘A’ temper tantrum though I have ceased the really bad ones (thanks Lexapro).  I still get kinda out of control when having fun and rarely stop to think or care what anyone else thinks of me in a given situation, I act for me and me alone.  SO those things make me a bit hard to handle for some (like Lord Voldemort/ex-husband).

At my best I am a very loving person.  I am very loyal to those that I love and often forgiving of their short comings to a fault.  I never trash my man to anyone and therefore often had trouble relating to other wives during ‘hen club’ sessions.  I never spoke negatively about my hubby, though believe me he has his share of faults, some glaring.  I am very protective of those I love.  I am simple and easy to please, very affectionate and I enjoy intimacy (yes I LOVE sex – there I said it). I’ve blogged in the past about why I think I’m over all a pretty cool chick to know.

BUT if you want all the good that I am, and believe me there is a lot of good in this perfectly imperfect woman, then you have to be willing to accept the bad along with it.  I no longer make any apologies for who and what I am, what you see is what you get and if you don’t like it fine, move along because you are holding up the line for those that want the total package.

I recently posted a blog about searching for friends with benefits, Qualifications For A Frog Prince With Benefits and stated that applications were being accepted.  Well that application process has now been closed, I am no longer accepting applications for this position.  The response was flattering, to say the very least, lots of interesting pigs men wanted to be considered (don’t take offense, remember, the ex is the one that told me all men are pigs, before he showed me he is their king).  I’ve seen quite a number of these swine gents and given a few a serious test drive.  I really cannot say I found fault in any of those as far as the benefits side of things is concerned. Ya’ll are rocking oinkers!  However, for now the position has been nicely filled.

Amongst the number of hogs and wild boars many fine fellas that I’ve met, one from the past emerged.  He was an online friend, and a few times in person hug and hello.  He was unaware of any application process currently taking place, I more or less sought him out.  I was on my way to the office one Saturday and spotted a guy on a motorcycle that reminded me of this one.  I had kept his number over the years, though I’ll be damned if I know why, just a ‘feeling’ I should not erase that one when I did my periodic clean up of my phone contacts.  I first did what every cyber crack addict does, and got online and tried to find him on Facebook, Myspace, Twitter and through old email addresses.  When that didn’t work I decided to just call him.  My hesitation in this was I didn’t know if he was currently involved with anyone and I did not wish to create any drama in his life.  However it was my last remaining option so I called and left a message on his voice mail. Within minutes he phoned me back, launching us into an interview process ‘get to know you’ cycle with Mr. Hot 50+ (now known as Mr. Twisted Steel And Sex Appeal – which he TOTALLY is!).

I’ve been privileged to be the fender fluff on his bike a few times of late, and recently the passenger in his really sweet and sexy Corvette.  We’ve exchanged emails, many phone calls, and spent time together both for and without the benefits.  He is all twisted steel and sex appeal, nice hard muscles, wrestles, musician, and scores tops on the benefits charts.  He expressed that he had no interest in the ‘lifestyle’ I participate in, as he is not one that likes to “share”, but he would never ask me to stop doing something I enjoy, and he didn’t feel he has the right too, he simply did not care to know anything about what I did apart from him.   I admit, when I thought about somethings he said, I am not all that keen on sharing him at this point either.  For now I want to get to know him, spend time with him, and enjoy this friendship cupcake that is so generously iced.  No, not in a commitment sort of arrangement, this friendship is far from that if it ever ends up there. We’ve both been burned badly by the fires of emotions and both overly cautious about entering that inferno again.  I’d say the best way to put it is we’re both only interested in one dessert selection off of the cart for the moment.  So for now, just really not interested in gluttony when it comes to the FWB (one great one is more than enough), I’m going to enjoy this special friendship and the fringes that go with it.  I’ll still enjoy my guy friends just not the physical side of those friendships.

So, for now, the “toad” I kissed recently turned out to be a gentleman in disguise and I think I will just hang out here in this pond for a while.  Life is short and I’m not passing up a good thing.  If we get bored with each other, I’ll hop off this lily pad and open up the application process again.

Day 11 → Something People Seem To Compliment Me On The Most

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30 Days of Truth

Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on

Without a doubt it would be my eyes.  Long ago I received compliments on my eyes and I learned to play up that feature.  Many have told me that they can read me clearly in my eyes no matter what is coming out of my mouth, my eyes will give me away.

Click here for more information about the 30 Days of Truths

Wine & Cheese – 15th Serving

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Every week on Wednesday I  devote a blog to whining.  Despite being a really happy, positive person, I do have things that annoy me at times.  I never let anything grate on my nerves for long but thought it would be fun to vent them periodically in my blogs.

I also feel that good things, the cheese in life, should be acknowledged as well.

I’m even going to throw in a bit of dessert, a piece of virtual chocolate, something that made me laugh or smile  just a bit more than normal.

Sit back and join me now for the 15th serving of some wine and cheese!

WINE

Gabba Gas Up

I’m really very tolerant for the most part, I swear to you I am.  But this one just floored me.  There are 2 establishments near me that sell gas, one is a Speedway station, a combination carry-out and gas station.  The other, across the street, is a  UDF (United Dairy Farmers) that also sells gasoline.  Without a doubt every time gas takes a jump up in price, UDF will hold off that day until later to raise their price, causing a mass rush to their pumps to fill up.  It isn’t bad enough that there is no logical reason for the price to jump 10 cents a gallon, but then there is this line of cars snaking out into the street from every entrance, waiting to fill up their tanks while it is still less expensive here than across the street.  I get that, I too will take advantage of this savings if the line isn’t too long and I happen to notice the price difference.  Sadly most of the time it is the traffic jam in their parking lot that alerts me that UDF is holding off on changing the price.  They aren’t dumb this is drawing in motorists in droves, no doubt making more in that afternoon off all these bargain hunters than Speedway will make all the rest of the week off the price hike.  My issue is with the idiots that stand in the parking lot and talk!  The line has formed, everyone is waiting and Joe Schmoe and Billy Bob are standing there having a conversation, catching up on the wife and kids.  Pay for your damn gas and get the hell out of the way!  If you have already paid then MOVE THE HECK AWAY FROM THE PUMP! The only reason no one is running your sorry asses down is there isn’t enough room in the congested parking lot to get up enough speed to make it worth it.

Air Expensive

WOW, really? We charge for air now?  75 cents to use the air at the gas station to put air in my car tire??? I could not believe it.  I pull in, knowing the tire is very low, thanks to the multitude of pot holes on my way up I75 every day (that in and of itself is a whine), the ones that once in a grand while I hit because I zoned during the freeway waltz and forgot to dodge, pull up to fill the tire and WTF? Seriously? 75 cents?  I dig through my purse, dumping the contents on the seat, go through the ash tray, under floor mats, and nope don’t have 75 cents on me.  Oh that’s right I had to pay Rosie Sow for dropping the ‘F’ bomb (I say Fuck a lot!), well shit.  SO, now I have to drive to the bank to use the ATM to get cash, which I NEVER have, the smallest denomination available is a $10 bill, then go back to the gas station to get change so I can pay for AIR.  Why are we charging for air? Is someone going to be sending me an itemized statement on my death bed for what I’ve been breathing up until that point? 30 minutes later I am finally able to get on the highway to head home, in time to get stuck in a long mess of traffic because some loser on his cell phone got in an accident up ahead and blocked 2 lanes of traffic.  Well I don’t KNOW that he was on his cell phone but odds are in my favor that if I put money on it he was busy talking and driving.

Can  you believe it??? I only had 2 things to whine about this week…just 2!  Not to worry, I’m sure I’ll be back up to 3 in no time.

CHEESE

My Bengals won again on Sunday.  Now, I will give you that it was far from a pretty win, in fact I still say the offense just SUCKS. But thanks to the defense showing up again, we won.  YA!!!  I’m certain I can take ALL the credit for their luck, as my jersey is sporting the number 13, my lucky number, and my name, which no doubt is bringing them loads of great luck!  :)

I gotta say that I had a pleasant surprise this weekend when a very special friend drove 40 minutes to take me for a ride because he simply wanted to see me.  We both have lives packed with obligations, so we rarely get to actually see each other.  He simply wanted to take me for a ride in his very sexy car, hold my hand, kiss me and spend a few minutes with me.  We spent all of about that same amount of time together as it took him to get here, and that is all he wanted! Just to spend a little time with me.  Hard to knock a guy that just wanted to be together even if only for a short drive.  He may just restore my faith in the male gender enough to admit maybe not ALL men are complete pigs.

Brach’s Candy Corn is on the shelves and SO fresh!  And I found a new flavor, caramel.  I think this could be a serious problem for me so I will not be taking advantage of the recent sale I saw on this, one of my all time favorite candies ever.  But I must admit, it totally thrilled me to pieces when I savored a handful or 6 this weekend.  It’s scary how easy I am to please sometimes.

DESSERT

M&M: the perfect food, containing all four food groups: sugar, caffeine, chocolate and grease.
~ From Daffynitions Twitter feed

Day 10 → Someone I Need To Let Go, Or Wish I Didn’t Know

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30 Days of Truth

Day 10 – Someone You Need To Let Go, Or Wish You Didn’t Know

I’ve been thinking on this post for well over a week now, trying to determine if I have a ‘need to let go’ issue or a ‘wish I didn’t know’ issue.  I am really a firm believer that everyone that comes and goes in our lives is there, however briefly, for a reason.  We may not see it or understand until long after we can look back, if there ever is an enlightening time, but everyone serves a purpose.  Garth Brooks wrote a great song, The Dance, that often over many years, rings true to me again and again.

Looking back on the memory of
The dance we shared beneath the stars above
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known you’d ever say goodbye
And now I’m glad I didn’t know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I’d of had to miss the dance
Holding you I held everything
For a moment wasn’t I the king
But if I’d only known how the king would fall
Hey who’s to say you know I might have changed it all
And now I’m glad I didn’t know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I’d of had to miss the dance
Yes my life is better left to chance
I could have missed the pain but I’d of had to miss the dance

During the course of this year I have often thought about those words as I have worked through the pain of my divorce.  23 years is a long time, in fact fully one half of my life.  I spent one half of my life married to the man that was Prince Charming to me.  My love for him is still there, I doubt it will ever not be the case.  I loved him unconditionally, staying even when he gave me reason to file for a divorce, and other times when it just got so hard and so painful to be married to him through his 17 surgeries and the asshole he was throughout, because I loved him that much.  I believed in him and he was the center of my world.  The hardest thing to face for me was that my love and devotion was one sided, that only one of us really meant “for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, til death do us part”.

I’ve never not taken ownership of the issues that I myself had, once I was able to see them.  With medical help I was diagnosed with what is a simple chemical imbalance and medicate that problem with a great, antipsychotic drug that balances out the serotonin.  It took missing my meds for 2 days for me to SEE for myself just how that imbalance was impacting my emotions, taking them to the extremes.  It is too late to do anything about the past, but for the future I am able to be ‘normal’.  In that two day span I saw crystal clear what I must have been like, not all of the time, but on those occasions when for whatever reason I’d be off balance and hit overload.  I’ve also began to seriously wonder if I wasn’t ADD as well, as I’d obsess about things at times, which I also no longer do to such abnormal extremes.

Over the past few weeks I’ve regretted the way things ended between me and hubby.  Oh I joke around here and there now calling him Lord Voldemort, He who shall not be named, and of late Grumpy Dwarf.  But it is now in fun, not out of a mean spirit.  I never really had a malicious intent toward him, just a lot of raw pain I struggled to over come.  I won’t say my heart is healed, as it is not.  My intentions for 23 years were always to make him happy, and to love him no matter what.  It was hard to be tossed out of his life and see him move on so fast to something or someone else, whatever the case may be.  By the time he told me he wanted out, he was already ‘moving on’ with his life, I was just facing it for the first time.  His present, of being a single man and going out and being free of me, was still my future.  His mind and heart had left me behind and started new, while mine was just standing up after the storm, chest deep in debris from the shock and realization that it was over.  Throughout these past months he has turned completely away, blocked me from contacting him and even has a very angry, hateful attitude toward me.  He never was able to understand why I was so upset and angry at him throughout the months prior to our divorce, he never grasped that he was months, even years (according to him) ahead of me in the acceptance phase.  I don’t know exactly how he expected me to react, maybe he thought I’d be sending him flowers and wishing him well, when instead I lashed out at times in hurt.  I made threats at times regarding the house and other parts of the divorce settlement, but never carried through on them.  When the time came I kept my word, signed the papers, and walked away.  All in all I think I handled things very well for someone that was so deeply in love and so devoted, after being handed my heart in a thousand pieces and rejected.

I’ll forever regret that things did not turn out the way I had dreamed, that we’d grow old together.  I regret that loving him with everything in me was not enough.  I regret that while I was very much in love and happy, he was not.  I also regret that he is angry and not willing to even attempt to be civil for the sake of our kids.  I do not regret that for 23 years I was able to share my life with my Prince Charming, to be his lover, to find my strength in him, to turn to him when I needed reassurance or help, or find security when I was afraid.  I will always have a spot in my heart for him.

Recently someone asked me to really think hard, IF Pete ever wanted to put things back together again, would I be willing to try.  I thought on that, a long time.  Even with the help of the medication to bring me in line, even though I love him still and always will, the answer is no.  It is him that I need/needed to let go.  I knew when I came up on this topic that my friend’s question was in perfect timing. And I went through a mental and emotional process over the past week of doing just that, letting ‘him’ go.

I also came to the realization that in time, I MIGHT allow myself to love someone like that again.  But it will be slow in coming about.  I deserve someone that will love me with the same intensity that I love, that will love unconditionally, that will see me as a blessing in their life, and see how fortunate they are to have me.  Just the way I felt about Pete, I deserved that in return.  Next time, IF there is a next time, I will not stay in a relationship with anyone that does not match me in opening up their heart and soul to me, the way I did for Pete, the way he never was able to for me.  We all bring baggage along in life, and that is fine.  But don’t hide it, put it out there so we both know what we are getting into.  Talk, share, and be open about what is tolerable and not tolerable.  But if you want to take my love, you better be giving just as much back and giving first, or it won’t be yours to have.

So..it is Pete, Lord Voldemort, He who shall not be named, Grumpy Dwarf etc, that I need to let go.  There is the door, good luck and don’t let it hit  you in your cute, tiny little ass.

Click here for more information about the 30 Days of Truths

Meet Me On Monday 09-27-2010

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The past 7-10 days have just been hell! The boss resigned, my work life is on end and so damn stressful that I amazed I have not quit and gone home several days, and that my hair is all still in my head.

I apologize to my readers for the change in the look of my blog, I am bouncing between 2 different themes/backgrounds/layouts trying to decide which one I like best.  Hang with me I will figure it out.

Okay it is the 16th edition of Meet Me On Monday, a great MeMe that is hosted by Never Growing Old that is a fun way to get to know the person behind the blog, if you wish to participate on your own blog click the icon or  link above to join us:

Blogging is a funny thing…we tell our most intimate thoughts for all to read and yet most of the time I find myself sitting and wondering, “who is this person!?”  I know them…but yet I don’t know them!  I want to know who the person is behind all those words so I thought of a great way for all of us to “meet” each other!

Every Sunday I will post five get to know you questions that you can copy and paste into your own Monday post and we can all learn a little more about each and every one of us!!

“Its a great way to to meet new friends and for others to get to know me better….one Monday at a time!!!”….as quoted by the Chacogirl!! I will make this SIMPLE and FUN!!!

Questions:

1.  How many TV’s do you have in your home?
2.  What is on your bedside table (nightstand)?
3.  How many pair of shoes do you own?
4.  Can you change a flat tire?
5.  Do you prefer sweet treats or salty treats?

1.  How many TV’s do you have in your home?

We have 5 TVs in the Princess Palace.  On large screen in the family room, then 4 of the Divas also have a TV in their room.  I currently do not but keep hoping to finally afford a small flat screen for my room, it just is not a big priority at the  moment.

2.  What is on your bedside table (nightstand)?

My nightstand is across the room, holds a lamp and a decorative box on the top of it.  Next to the bed is my vanity which has my glasses, watch, some lotion and a lamp as well.  My kitten enjoys getting up there at night when I am asleep and knocking the lotion and eye cream off on to the floor..and my watch, and my glasses..

3.  How many pair of shoes do you own?

Roughly off the top of my head 15 pair? Not all that into shoes, for certain no more than 20.  That said, some are summer/warm weather ones, some are colder weather, and a pair of riding boots for those opportunities to be fender fluff on someone’s bike.

4.  Can you change a flat tire?

That would be a big NO.  I know it is something I SHOULD know how to do, and probably should be something I learn, but it is not currently in my DIM (Do It Myself) manual.

5.  Do you prefer sweet treats or salty treats?

Both, depending on my current mood and if I am suffering from PMS.  My favorite way to get them both is to mix Brach’s Candy Corn and dry roasted peanuts together.

10 Things On My Mind This Week

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At this writing there are only 90 shopping days until Christmas.  Unlike the past few years I really need to get focused and start shopping NOW.  That way if we do have lay offs for the winter (my line of work is seasonal) at least I will have that done and not hanging over my head.

Work – I am so stressed out at the office.  The boss resigned last weekend and this week I had to juggle managing production in 2 territories/cities.  I think I finally figured out the best way to do this but I am still wired and hoping it works.  I hate to fail so I’ve lost sleep and given myself a multitude of tension headaches trying to cover everything…and knowing that there are things that fell through the cracks that could not be helped.  Facing that I am one person and it will work itself out isn’t easy sometimes.

My dad – I’m growing concerned about him.  We have him over every weekend to get him out of the house.  He lives alone (my brother is living there while working out new living arrangements with his pending divorce but he is rarely around) and his health is failing.  His legs have lost feeling over the years and he falls a lot but won’t go into assisted living.  I know I need to check in on him more, but there is only so much time in a day and I am already stretched in so many directions.  I need a clone.

Sticking with the Shrinkvivor goals so that I can get rid of this last 15 or so pounds that have hounded me for years.  I know with the holidays just around the bend there is great risk of putting on weight instead of losing it.  Gotta stay focused!!

My son – with the recent shooting of 2 local police officers it just makes me all the more aware of how dangerous his job is and how much I really do worry about him.  Keeps my praying daily for his protection and safety.

My baby girl – her first week back of her last year of college.  She is carrying her largest class load ever and is trying to work too, so she is learning very quickly about how valuable sleep is to her and has a real appreciation again for the opportunity to nap now and then.

SLEEP – I am not getting nearly enough and I need to do so.  I need to make myself go to bed earlier before I run myself down and get sick.  I cannot afford to be sick right now with no medical insurance and not getting payed if I am not working.

I need to get a flu shot.  I’ve only failed to get one 2 times in the last 20 or so years, and both times I missed it I got the flu bad.  Not taking a chance with it this year because I cannot afford the down time.  I just hate having to spend the $25 right now, but I know it will be worth it.

Keeping close watch and sending out resumes even though I am working at the moment.  If this job shuts down over the winter I’m going to need something and it never hurts to look.  If I can find something full time with benefits, which I very much NEED, and the pay is good, I’m going to go for it.  Just unnerving looking into something else new right now, not sure I am up for anymore change at the moment.

Me time – I need to find a chunk of time every day just to veg and let myself relax.  The pressures of life keep trying to worm their way in and take over, and I cannot let the happen.  I need to give myself 30 minutes a day to either nap, read, crochet…something just for myself, uninterrupted.

10 Reasons Why I Love My Job

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Mama's Losin' It

There are always a lot of reasons we hate our jobs, so I decided to chose this writing assignment so that I could THINK through the reasons I love my job.

1. I’m employed! Sounds silly but I was let go from my previous job after 26 years with the company.  I spent 18 months drawing unemployment and crawling the walls.  Certainly I did enjoy being home and free to spend my day as I wished but my kids are grown so there wasn’t a lot to do.  I did experiment with some cooking and that went well, and enjoyed laying pool side in the summer, but I NEED to work.  So finding this job was a blessing!

2. Other than my subcontractors and the boss coming and going throughout the day, for the most part it is just me there.  I have a lot of freedom to listen to whatever I want on the radio, curse a blue streak when I feel the need, and other than the phones I am really left undisturbed a good portion of the time.  I like this, I do not do well with micro-managers so being able to function without someone over my shoulder is great.  And when I need it quiet to concentrate, it is QUIET.

Simon Howden / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

3.  The challenge..seriously since the boss resigned over the past weekend my job has become a world class challenge.  I’m trying to get my balance in managing 2 territories and doing all the necessary follow up and preparation so my subcontractors are on the ball and supporting the owner and VP that are now handling all the quoting and sales in these areas as well as their own.  I am stressed but it is like being dared to fail so I’m all over it and trying hard to succeed.

4.  Not going to lie, the free donuts on Fridays are kinda special to me.  The building management provides them in the coffee lounge every Friday morning, and that is just a sweet (no pun intended) little perk I very much enjoy!

5.  Free coffee is another mega plus!  The building management also provides the free coffee daily and anymore I need all the life giving push I can get in the mornings.  More than once I’ve read or heard about studies indicating that ADD adults tend to be medicated by caffeine which then masks the symptoms.  The women in my family drink coffee like addicts shooting up so there may indeed be something to it.  We can drink an entire pot each and sleep like bricks, and we’re focused on it so who knows.

6.  It keeps me busy!  Nothing is worse than watching the clock tick slowly by and being bored out of one’s mind.  This job keeps me hopping and that makes the day go by faster.  In fact some days it goes by too fast and I wish there were a few more hours to the work day so I could stay ahead of the tasks when things pile up.

7.  The job is the paycheck and the paycheck is keeping the bill collectors at bay.  I am able to pay all of my debts and that is a huge plus for me since I have no desire to have bad credit.  Took a long time after the first divorce 25 years ago to get my credit score rebuilt, not about to let that happen again.

8.  The close proximity of Chipotle Mexican Grill is another thing I LOVE about my job.  I am addicted to their steak bowl with rice, black beans, corn salsa and cheese so having one literally a block away from me can some days make it all worth the effort.  Comfort food makes the day so much better!

9.  Parking is a plus, it is also free and there is a large parking lot out there.  Knowing folks that have to go downtown to work and pay ridiculous amounts of money to park in the garages makes me realize how fortunate I am that my wallet is not forking out money to plant the car between a couple of white lines somewhere.

10. A full hour for lunch if I want it!  In that hour I am able to recharge my mental batteries and untangle my thoughts so I can tackle the remainder of the day.  Sometimes that may involve a few rounds of Farkle on Facebook, a good novel, or putting my head on the desk and taking a nap.  Whatever I do with it, that full 60 minutes that is ALL mine makes for a better work day!

Wine & Cheese – 14th Serving

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Every week on Wednesday I  devote a blog to whining.  Despite being a really happy, positive person, I do have things that annoy me at times.  I never let anything grate on my nerves for long but thought it would be fun to vent them periodically in my blogs.

I also feel that good things, the cheese in life, should be acknowledged as well.

I’m even going to throw in a bit of dessert, a piece of virtual chocolate, something that made me laugh or smile  just a bit more than normal.

Sit back and join me now for the 14th serving of some wine and cheese!

One  would think by now I’d run out of things to whine about…or at least be so sauced by the 14th glass of wine that nothing could annoy me…think again!  :)

WINE

Bungles Are Back!!!

It is football season, and so therefore you can expect me to whine about the Cincinnati Bengals.  WTH was that sorry excuse of a win about Sunday? Do we  HAVE an offense??  I would rather have a notch in the win column, yes, but really boys 5 field goals is all we could produce to get our 15 points? You really aren’t thinking we can  take on the likes of the Pittsburgh Steelers playing that way I hope!!! Thank GOD the defense decided to show up to play Sunday.  GET IT TOGETHER!!!!

Talking Heads

And while on the topic of sports…I swear the announcers for the football games could seriously just shut up already.  “He is wishing/thinking/wanting blah blah blah” like they can read the  minds of the players or something.  They must seriously love to hear themselves talking because they never shut up.  Really, say nothing, we can all see what is going on, we don’t need your non-stop jibber jabber.  You are not funny or entertaining!

Old Fart Dating

Did I miss something? When did turning 50 make one a senior citizen?  I keep getting these ads on the sidebar of my Facebook telling me I can meet thousands of senior singles on a particular dating site with a head line that says “Date Men Over 50″.  WTF??? So what you are telling me is less than 3 years I’m considered an old lady??? Do I get a senior discount at the store? Do I then qualify for a Golden Buckeye card?  Will AARP start sending me stuff in the mail? REALLY????  Sorry but um NO men at 50 are not seniors, in fact several are pretty damn hot!

CHEESE

Speaking of hot men over 50..I recently reconnected with hot one that I had  met in the past.  I’ve been hesitant to mention him because honestly I wasn’t sure how he’d feel about that. But now I’m going to as I pretty much have his okay.  I think.  Either way, he is a NICE GUY, and I like that!  A great heart, super personality, BRAINS, strong faith, all wrapped up in tall package made of sexy eyes and smile, muscles, outstanding kisser and….OOPS this is my PG-13 page…..  Yes I am enjoying this friend with benefits.  He has a nice bike too and I admit it, I love being wrapped around him as his fender fluff, just spending time together as friends.  Getting to know him better has been very nice and I’m looking forward to continuing.

Gotta mention this one, and I feel like I should be getting paid for pimping them…I’ve mentioned Febreze Home Collection Luminaries before, and now they have seasonal scents in the stores. The one sleeve has spider webs and spiders, perfect for Halloween, and OMG the scent of Caramel Crisp reminds me of caramel apples. It is SO wonderful!  Again, gotta love it, they are like having a candle lit (looks like one) and it will go out after 4 hours.  Safe to ‘burn’ without risk of kids, pets knocking them over (or falling asleep) and starting the house on fire.  Check the site for more seasonal scents or your favorite store.

Autumn…while I am totally a summer person, loving it HOT outside, tan skin, swimming, beaches etc., I must say that sleeping with the windows open and needing to snuggle in under my comforter at night has been SO nice!   We’ve also been able to enjoy our fire pit a few evenings and nothing smells like a wood burning fire or fire place.   :)

DESSERT

“Bachelors know more about women than married men. That’s why they’re not married.”
~ From Funny One Liners Tweet Feed

Click HERE for past editions of Wine & Cheese Wednesday.

Copyright © 2010 – The Musings Of Marvi Marti – ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

I Received Some Love Today!

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It is always nice to receive comments and feedback from readers on the things I write, I read them all and I do try hard to reply to them all as soon as possible.

I received some unexpected love today in the form of a blog award from McKenzie over at “Life As A Stay At Home Mom.

1. I accept this award from Mckenzie…thanks again!!

2. Pay it forward to 5 other bloggers. This list will be below this. (originally saw this for 15 bloggers but honestly 5 was easier for me with so much going on behind the scenes so I cheated and made it 5 – sorry to the originator!!)

3. Contact those blog owners and let them know they have been chosen.

This was very hard to chose, as I follow a lot of blogs and I think ALL of the women and their blogs are beautiful in different ways.  You all make my reading time a total pleasure so I felt I should honor you by passing this on.

AWARDS TO:

Are You Serious? – Midwestern Mama

Never Growing Old

Things I Can’t Say

Jeanne Nicole: Adventures Of A Not-So-Average Teen

La Bella Vita (get writing again!!!)

Lights, Camera…ACTION!!!

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Francesco Marino / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Once upon a time, I looked ahead in my life and saw myself married, a stay at home mommy, taking care of 3 or 4 little ones and happily married to Prince Charming.  He would go to work and I’d work at home, keeping a neat and tidy house, with all of our children well behaved and absolute little darlings under my guidance.  We’d go to church on Sunday mornings and visit the grandparents on alternating Sunday afternoons.  And of course we’d grow old together, watch our children get married and then we’d be the grandparents, living happily every after.

REALITY CHECK!!!!!!

Fast forward:  I never was a stay at home mother, in fact outside of being unemployed for 18 months recently, I’ve worked since I was 16 years old.   I married shortly after high school and then found myself divorced and raising a child, before finally meeting Prince Charming and marrying “til death do us part”.  HA! or til someone decided to toss in the towel and go his own way.  Nursery Rhyme over, the prince was a fraud and happily ever after isn’t happening. At least not for the moment.

When I was married it was about US, a team, me, him and the kiddos.  Decisions were made based on what we, or I should say HE (the control freak that he was) felt was in the best interest of our family team as a whole.  It worked for us and I can honestly say he played the best hand he could with the cards life dealt us.  During that time I had to consider more than myself when I did things, because my actions could, and often did, impact the whole family. Even back when I first started blogging on Myspace, I had to consider how my writings would impact my husband and kids.  Hubby would scrutinize anything and everything I had written (when he was aware) down to what I posted on other people’s Facebook walls (see he WAS a control freak).  I was allowed to be a free thinker just not have freedom of expression if he thought what I had to say was wrong or out of line.  He liked having control over the flow of information when it came to anything we did, so he would put his foot down frequently and I either deleted or edited based on his wishes.  And yeah, I went along with the program, it worked for us.  The kids grew up to be responsible adults (so far) at 20 and 26 years old, working and pretty much beginning to live their own lives independent of us.

Then came the D-I-V-O-R-C-E and with it a whole lot of rewrites of the future script and scene changes.

I recently had a conversation with the ex-hubster and it was not pretty.  Actually it wasn’t much of a conversation, he called me (he has me blocked so I cannot call his phone), I listened while he cussed a blue streak and yelled at me.  See, my blogs no longer need his stamp of approval, I no longer get his official okee dokee when I post on someone’s Facebook walls or comment on their status.  He doesn’t read what I write about, but ‘hears’ about it from others.  He cannot see what I post in the land of walls and status updates because on Facebook he has me blocked so nothing I do is even visible to him.  So he gets his information 2nd or 3rd hand.  He claims he doesn’t care and tells folks that but they still keep informing him.  Either he is putting on one hell of a show and really is interested, or he needs to remove some well meaning friends from his life because they don’t seem to be getting the message.  He really IS a lousy communicator, not always very clear so maybe he needs to be more blunt and tell them to shut the hell up?

Anyway our most recent conversation was about my blog content, and how he felt I had no right to share some of the information about our personal life that I have chosen to write about.  In between the considerable use of the words “fuck”, “shit”, and “bullshit” I was able to determine that I had shared things he felt MIGHT impact his job (references to our extra curricular activities, all of which were legal and fun) and might impact our children’s lives.  I’m not entirely sure what all of those things are specifically other than he was fuming pissed off because he didn’t see the humor others did not find the humor in a recent post in which I claimed I “wanted to fuck one of his coworkers”.  I explained the post, related to the Plastic Joy Award I had been given, was a joke, it was all in fun.  He said no one else found the humor in it and that everyone took it seriously.  Since the ‘co-worker’ didn’t seem to be upset over it (yeah I checked) and took the teasing from others quite well, I’m not really at all certain what has Lord Voldemort‘s briefs in knot.  Maybe he is jealous he didn’t make my top 5?  He did mention that I need to think about someone other than myself and watch what I write about blah blah blah.

So, I thought on that since this past Thursday’s rude, obnoxious scolding I received (I know, I should simply have hung up, but him going off like a 5 year old throwing a temper tantrum was just too entertaining), and I arrive at the following conclusion:

YES I AM VERY SELFISH, I THINK ONLY OF MYSELF AND YES THE WORLD REVOLVES AROUND ME!

:: puts hand to ear and listens closely for the shocked ‘gasps’ from readers:: …..hmm….nothing! Maybe because no one else is shocked by this revelation that isn’t the least bit news?

See, what the ex doesn’t seem to grasp is that there is no team US any longer.  He no longer has control, no longer gets to call the shots where I am concerned.  I’m 47 years old, my kids are grown and no longer live with mommy, and I’m divorced.  That leaves only ME to be concerned about.  Well me and the recent addition to my life of one kitten but rest assured she is well fed and cared for and couldn’t care less what I write about regarding her antics.  When divorce happens the team breaks up and each member goes their own way.  My life now revolves completely around me, I am the center of my world, it is no longer him.  I do everything I do based completely upon my wants, desires and motives and no longer need to consider how anything I do or say will affect anyone else in the long run.  Life now really is all about ME!

Now that I am sitting in the director’s chair of life, one of the things I decided to do was write about my life experiences.  Sometimes those blog posts will be about my life when married, the differences between those times and now, life as a single woman, things I’m learning about myself.  They will cover past and present adventures, experiences, perspectives and even future hopes and dreams.  But the key to all of it is I am in the center of that, it is about me now!  When he was in a lead role in this production, he could call the shots and had input as to the content of my writings.  But now, at best he makes a guest appearance, barely enough to be considered supporting actor in the show, and since he has no contract he doesn’t get to edit the script.  If he wants to direct, he has his own reality show of life.  All scenes I share are from my own perspective and I make all editing decisions.  The key element is I present it honestly and in writing, he chooses to do it verbally so there is no ‘evidence’.  Whatever!

Ah the ongoing saga of the divorce.  Guess the dust just hasn’t settled completely.

CUT! That’s a wrap people, we’re done for today.

*********DISCLAIMER*************

Regarding said co-worker of the ex – yes he IS hot, yes I certainly would do the sheet mambo with him IF I was younger blah blah blah, as what woman in her right mind would NOT want to have hot monkey sex with the young stud, but he isn’t into us older chicks. Besides it was a JOKE folks lighten the hell up!

Copyright © 2010 – The Musings Of Marvi Marti – ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

I Want To Be Mikhail Dubrinsky’s Life Mate!

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Today’s writing prompt from Plinky was, “If you could be a character from any book you’ve read, who would you be?”

WOW that answer came to me immediately, Raven from Christine Feehan’s first book in the Dark Series, Dark Prince.  Like me she is head strong, independent and takes a strong man to control her.  I don’t mean just physically, I’m talking strong willed, minded, but not abusive, totally masculine, yet a romantic.  A true MAN.

She meets Mikhail Dubrinsky of the Carpathian race, a race of blood feeders that, should they not find their life mate, will eventually turn vampire..the undead.  She isn’t looking for a man in her life, but their minds touch one night…yes they speak in their minds.  She is somewhat psychic I guess you’d say, she feels his pain in the night far away and connects with him.  All kinda off the charts but very cool reading.  VERY sexy stories, very steamy sex scenes, intense love and killer plots.  Romantic thrillers of sorts rooted in the paranormal.  They make this whole Twilight thing look like nursery rhymes.  If you like this sort of stuff, I highly recommend this series of books.

This is the first book in the series, and the first one I ever read.  I have now read them all.  Such a pity these guys are only fiction, because they are the shit!  They have ONE life mate, she is it, she completes him and makes him whole.  As he grows older he loses his ability to see in color and feel emotions until he finds the woman who is his life mate.  She is what keeps him from turning vampire, she is the balance for the man and the only woman for him.  Too many pluses to go into here but if I could be any character in a book I read, I’d be Raven, his life mate because THAT is a man I could see giving up my swearing off of long term relationships.

The Carpathian males have to bind their life mates to them with the following words.  I always thought they’d make outstanding wedding vows from a man to his wife…but then, the ones spoken today usually don’t mean a damn thing to men anyway so why in the world would these? Ah the stuff of dreams and fantasies…

Carpathian Binding Words

I claim you as my life mate
I belong to you
I offer my life for you
I give to you my protection, my allegiance, my heart, my body, and my soul
I take into my keeping the same that is yours
Your life, happiness, and welfare will be cherished and placed above my own for all time
You are my life mate
Bound to me for all eternity and always in my care

To be loved and cherished like that, like Mikhail held Raven in his heart, hell yes that is what I want!! The stuff of fiction, I know.  The way we gals feel about our men but men are pigs and not capable of that kind of love and devotion in return.   I’ve seen it time and again, men think with their penis, not their brain.  Something cuter walks by and they will give up a life time of someone who loved them with all of their faults to chase that skirt, or to go find themselves and happiness.  Men are nothing but horn dog swine.  Now, sure the men in these books have a sex drive to beat all, but only for their woman. They are faithful to the very end.

Anyway this was NOT a book review, just an answer to a question about being a character in a book.  I want to be Raven.

Wine & Cheese – 13th Serving

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Every week on Wednesday I  devote a blog to whining.  Despite being a really happy, positive person, I do have things that annoy me at times.  I never let anything grate on my nerves for long but thought it would be fun to vent them periodically in my blogs.

I also feel that good things, the cheese in life, should be acknowledged as well.

I’m even going to throw in a bit of dessert, a piece of virtual chocolate, something that made me laugh or smile  just a bit more than normal.

Sit back and join me now for the 13th serving of some wine and cheese!

WINE

Traffic Light Forfeiting

I swear every day I can see more and more reasons to ban cell phone use when driving.  Not just texting, as the city of Cincinnati has now passed an ordinance that bans texting/emailing while behind the wheel, but ANY use of cell phones while operating a motor vehicle.  Today when I headed out to pick up some lunch,  I was waiting for the light to turn left out of our office complex.  Turning left at this intersection requires waiting for the signal to give you the arrow, because someone deemed it too dangerous to make  that decision for oneself.  Likely due to idiots like the one I observed waiting to turn left INTO the complex.  Two cars were in that turn lane waiting on the arrow, and believe me this is a long wait, I have to endure it every morning.  I could balance my check  book during the wait and if you know me you know that takes a while.  When at last the signal changed the first car pulled away and turned into the office complex.  The  second car never moved.  I began to wonder if the driver had died at the wheel when I looked closer and could see he was so busy texting he did not realize the light had not only changed but that the car in front of him was gone.  I am not entirely certain he ever did realize he had sat through the long awaited opportunity because by the time I got the light to turn out he was still keying something into his phone, oblivious to the fact that he was one and a half car lengths from the stopping line and occupying the  turn  lane all alone now.  THAT is just plain ridiculous.  Anyone that absorbed in a text conversation should not  be driving.  Put the phone on silent and put it down and concentrate on driving the car.  And please, never, never, NEVER be in front of me at a light, or behind me while in motion, I don’t think you are safe.

What Not To Wear – Ever

If you are a man pay attention to this please.  Unless you work out on a regular basis and are muscular and solid, please do not wear wife beater shirts out in public and think you look hot.  Seriously if you have man dinners peaking through your shirt (man boobs), you have no business being seen in this shirt out in a public place.  And when you need suspenders to hold your pants up to go along with this shirt, then dear gawd go purchase a full length mirror and take a good look at yourself.  If you are over weight that is fine, but please, consider those of us that have to look at you when you use one of your dumb pick-up lines.  We do not find you attractive, you not a hunka hunka burning love.  You have bigger tits than an NFL cheerleader, cover that train wreck of a physique up please!!  I’d gouge out my eyes or pour bleach in them but the image is burned in my mind for life.  You won’t see my big butt in Daisy Dukes or spandex shorts, gain some fashion sense!

Sam Witches

No,  they are not a new Halloween treat, or decoration.  It is a total mispronunciation of the word sandwich.   S A N D W I C H.   Read it again,  S A N D W I C H.   Note that there is no ‘M’ in that word, sandwich.   It is is NOT pronounced ‘sam witch’, there is no such thing as a samwhich, samwitch, or samwich.  It is a SANDWICH.  The ‘D’ is not soft.  Say it with me, SAND,  and now this part, WICH.  It makes me flipping crazy when people order a samwich or tell me they made a ham and cheese samwich for lunch.   There is no such thing, even dictionary.com did not list it as slang.  One more time, try it, SANDWICH…..thank you.

CHEESE

Nothing is quite as nice as finding money you forgot you had.  In your jeans pocket, stashed behind your drivers license for a rainy day, or in my case opening your ashtray to figure out what is rattling around and discovering a nice handful of change!!!  Obviously I don’t use mine for ashes as I do not smoke.  I forgot that is the ex-hubby’s favorite place to dump change and the other day was trying to figure out what I was hearing in the car when I opened the ashtray and discovered about $2 in change. YA ME!!!

Recently I stumbled across a blog page that caught my eye, because they had developed a FUN way to shrink your jeans…by sizes. Shrinkvivor is like the show Survivor but online and for losing some weight. This is so cool and I cannot wait for it to begin tomorrow! My sister, a fellow blogger, decided to get in on it too. We’re in different tribes which adds to the competition and will make this much more fun!

And last but not least, sleeping with the windows open!  While Summer is by far my favorite time of year, because I HATE being cold, I have to admit that with the gradual change of seasons taking place it is SO nice to not only have the windows open and the air conditioning off, but I LOVE sleeping with the windows open.  On top of the nice breeze while I sleep, and the night sounds of crickets and tree frogs, my kitten is able to occupy herself when she isn’t sleepy by watching out the window, which beats her climbing on the night stand or dresser to pounce on me when I’m sleeping.

DESSERT

I have NO clue of the  origin, but this was too funny not to share.  Longer than the usual dessert I serve up but very enjoyable!

Amazing Grace

As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man.  He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper’s cemetery in the Eastern Oregon back country.

As I was not familiar with the backwoods,  I got lost and, being a typical man,  I didn’t stop for directions.   I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone and the hearse was nowhere in sight.  There were only the diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch.  I felt badly and apologized to the men for being late.

I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place.  I didn’t know what else to do, so I started to play. The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around.  I played out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. I played like I’ve never played before for this poor, homeless man.

And as I played ‘Amazing Grace,’ the workers began to weep.  They wept, I wept, we all wept together. When I finished I packed up my bagpipes and started for my car.  Though my head hung low, my heart was full. As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, “I ain’t never seen nothin’ like that before and I’ve been putting in septic tanks for twenty years.”

Apparently I’m still lost…

Day 09 – Someone I Didn’t Want To Let Go, But Just Drifted

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30 Days Of Truth

Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.

The first time I met them was in the airport.  They came off of a flight from San Diego,  accompanied by their temporary foster parents.  I teared up when I first saw them, knowing how scary this must be for them.  A few months prior their daddy had put them on a flight out to San Diego from Norfolk, not even knowing if he’d ever see them again.  They flew away to the other side of the country leaving behind all that was familiar including their beloved Nanny.   When they slipped out of the house that morning their mother didn’t know they had left.  She had pretty much cracked down the middle mentally and they were not safe there with her while daddy was at sea.  Her antics and lack of ability to care for the 4 little darlings resulted in them losing their babies, the state of California, who had control since the nightmare started there, ordered the kids returned to state custody.  Intent was to place them all for adoption and we knew no one was going to take 4 kids, ages 2, 4, 5, and 8.

My ex-husband had been raised in foster care until he was 7 years old.  When I first mentioned my cousin’s children to him, he told me no way, we were not taking one of the kids.  My cousin’s sister had hoped a few family members would be able to care for a child or two and at least get them all in one city.   Pete has a tough shell around his heart but there are cracks there, and his memories of foster care got to him.  He decided we’d just take all 4 kids for a few years until my cousin would be state side and able to make arrangements to get his kids back.

That was how we became the Brady Bunch of sorts.  That November night in the airport waiting area we became foster parents to these 4 kids.  I had received a folder on each child, complete with photos and medical history, and anything my cousin could think of to describe the kids.  I suspect the nanny, an angel if ever there was one walking this earth, supplied much of the information.  I would consult her several times in the coming year.  I did my homework,  read the materials over and over, but nothing prepared me for seeing those 4, scared little faces, uprooted for the umpteenth time, clinging to their temporary parents.  My first insight to their fragile state was on the way home.  The 8yo asked me how long they were staying with us, and I said at least a year.  He asked if that was longer than 30 days.  Then again when we got home, and the girls, 5 and 6, discovered that their daddy had brought  me their bedroom furniture and clothes and they were jumping up and down clapping about their things being there. They insisted on calling us mom and dad rather than aunt Marti and uncle Pete, and if that made them feel more stable we were fine with it.

That night my family was there to help welcome them, we had a big feast of pizza, it was complete chaos, and then after they were tucked in for the night and the house was quiet and I was laying next to Pete in bed and said “what have we done”.  I was just as scared as the kids.  He wrapped around me and said “it’s not so bad, 14 people left and went home, only 4 are up there”.

Two weeks after their arrival, Pete came home one afternoon, and the 2yo spoke his first words (the social workers and other foster parents said he couldn’t talk), “oh, dats ome” (oh dads home).  I cried again.  I did a lot of that for the first few months.  Like the day Pete had to break the 5yo baby’s heart.  She asked when she was going to get to see her mommy again.  She had been told somewhere along the way that mommy was very sick and in the hospital.  No one had told her she’d never see her again.  Pete had to tell her that day that she was not going to see mommy again, and she sat in his lap for 2 hours and sobbed her heart out.  Tough old dad held her and cried along with her.  I spent an hour curled up in her bed that night repeating the tears until she finally cried herself to sleep.  Life is just a bitch sometimes, and to all the wrong damn people!

For Christmas my sister found an ornament, after searching everywhere, that had 8 snowmen on it and had it personalized.  Me, Pete, our 2 kids, and our 4 babies names, one per snow man.  I hung it on the tree, and later noticed the 8yo boy standing there just looking at it for the longest time.  Then I heard him whisper “wow, we really are a family now”.  No one told me I needed to stock up on tissues for this adventure, another boo-hoo moment.

I’m not going to sugar coat it, being parents to 6 kids is not easy, especially when you go from 2 to 6 over night.  2, 4, 5, 8, 15 and 21.  We had our hands full.  But we did the best we could to make it fun.  Hubby home schooled the 8yo to get him up to speed, and rather than the 5yo going to kindergarten we held her back a year to give her time to adjust to her new life without her mom.  I changed my hours at work to 3 days, so I had 4 straight days with the kids.  We had fun days each week, like crazy hair day when we’d wear our hair in wacky styles.  Or pajama day when we stayed in our jammies all day because we could.  We had dessert first nights on Friday, if you didn’t eat all of your dessert you didn’t get dinner.  Needless to say it wasn’t long and we quit making dinner at all, it become dessert for dinner night and was a huge hit.  Friday was also movie night, oh Friday mornings we always made what their dad called, Wild Turkey Surprise (and I called Turkey Poop Pancakes), chocolate chip pancakes.  The kids totally loved all the ‘special’ days we could come up with, it gave them fun and we all looked forward to them.  And Pete and I found our inner child again.

The kids became Bengal fans (hard to avoid living with us), and were a huge part of our life for a year before dad divorced mom, got the nanny to join him in Virginia and was able to get his kids back.  We stayed in touch at first frequently.  They came to see us for Christmas that next year and then again in the summer.  I stayed in touch with the nanny often at first but over time life went on and little by little we lost contact.  We’re on each other’s Facebook and so I get to see how the kids are doing.  I never intended them drift away, they took a big piece of my heart back to their daddy’s when they left.

Every Christmas that ornament is carefully unpacked and I hang it in a visible spot.  Every time I see it I pray for the kids, and for the nanny, Crystal, now their mom.  Yes their fairy tale had a great ending, daddy married the nanny and she rocks!

Me, Pete, our daughter and our 4 'babies'

Meet Me On Monday

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Blogging is a funny thing…we tell our most intimate thoughts for all to read and yet most of the time I find myself sitting and wondering, “who is this person!?” I know them…but yet I don’t know them! I want to know who the person is behind all those words so I thought of a great way for all of us to “meet” each other!

Every Sunday Never Growing Old will post five get to know you questions that you can copy and paste into your own Monday post and we can all learn a little more about each and every one of us!! (go to her page to link in!)

“Its a great way to to meet new friends and for others to get to know me better….one Monday at a time!!!”….as quoted by the Chacogirl!!

She will make this SIMPLE and FUN!!!

She will add a linky on her page so we can follow who participates and get to know them better!! Be sure to link the POST and not just your whole blog!

Questions:

1. What is your favorite pasta dish?
2. What is the last thing you do before going to bed?
3. How many nights a week do you go out to eat?
4. Are you an avid book reader?
5. Would you rather have x-ray vision or bionic hearing?

What is your favorite pasta dish?

My ex-husbands stuffed-shells with meat…OMG that man is a fantastic cook and that by far is my favorite pasta dish!  Hmm…wonder if we in the Diva Den could pay him to make it for us?

What is the last thing you do before going to bed?

I  always make one last check of Twitter and Email via my cell phone, then I check-in on Foursquare into my big, comfy bed!!!

How many nights a week do you go out to eat?

It is rare we go out to eat in the Diva Den.  IF we do, maybe once every two weeks, usually payday, but most of the time we eat at home, preferring home cooked meals and our together time around the dining room table.

Are you an avid book reader?

YES! Though I have to be careful or I will end up staying awake half the night lost in a good book so I try to limit reading books until the weekend.

Would you rather have x-ray vision or bionic hearing?

Hearing!!! My hearing is kinda bad as it is, one ear in particular so I have a very difficult time hearing if there is a lot of background noise.  Bionic hearing would be awesome!

Filomena Scalise / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Frankly My Dear…

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Without a doubt this is one of my all time favorite movies, and despite its length I can darn near mouth right along with the entire script while watching it.  Once a year I will get it out and watch it and every few years re-read the book.

I grew up with a fascination about the pre-Civil War south, and into the war itself.  I loved the dresses of that time, the way women were true divas in the south, and I especially loved the Scarlet types that didn’t mind being at the heart of a good scandal now and then or bucking the ‘system’.   My favorite romance novels are often historical fiction from that same time in history.

When I was growing up my parents took us camping a lot, and one of the places we visited was My Old Kentucky Home.  I still remember it and just loved it!

In high school I took a literature course, Mind Of The South, where we studied various southern authors.  I came to really embrace the spirit of the character of Scarlet O’Hara.  She IS/WAS the ultimate Diva.  Her favorite reality show was definitely her own!  She also was certain it was all about her, always was and would be.  While that is a selfish attitude, it was that same out look that held her together through the worst times in her life and enabled her to do whatever she had to do to care for herself and her family.  She was a steel magnolia if ever there was one.  Okay, so not her directly, but her character was modeled after women who had come from the old South, through the war, and managed to pull themselves up and survive after the war ended.  Margaret Mitchell fashioned the character after women in her family and stories of women who had done just that.

I’ve had a tendency over the years to look at situations and think, what would Scarlet do?  She wasn’t afraid to go for her goal, seek whatever it was that made her happy, and she was more than willing to go against tradition if it was in her best interest to do so, all while not give a flying frog’s ass what anyone thought of her.  She didn’t waste time fretting over what she couldn’t change, because she could “think about it tomorrow, because tomorrow is another day”. She even accepted a marriage proposal to a known rake, because he suggested they get married just for the pure fun of it.  Now, if the right rogue were to come along even I might consider it again, IF it was strictly for fun and nothing more.  Assuming he can afford to keep me in Princess splendor as I so deserve! Lord knows Captain Butler was more than able to do it for Scarlet so why not make that the next bar of standard for myself? Yeah, I  like that.


This blog was written as an assignment from Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop

Mama's Losin' It